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 Northernsoul
Your Reality
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 Bush vs Kerry (Fight Club Match) 
#3053390 - 08/26/04 12:27 PM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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A little something to get away from all the typical jabber about the upcomming election, and the war in Iraq.
This may be just a tad hypothetical, but If Bush and Kerry faught in a Fight Club style match in the underground parking lot under the pentigon with a crowd of yelling and cheering politicians crowding around them, including Donald Rumsfeld, Collin Powel, Al Gore, Bill Clinton, and whatever. Just a bit hypothetical I know, but who do you seriously think would win? Who's in better shape? Who knows how to fight?
I seriously think that Kerry would win. I think he learned some crazy Kung-Fu in Cambodia back during the war, and is more active when it comes to sports.
But Bush has that crazy alter ego that tells him what to do (remember the one played by Brad Pitt in the movie?) Except this alter ego makes MUCH bigger bombs out of human fat.
Anyone think Bush could somehow win?
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When it comes
I'll know, I know
Just take my clothes and leave
And I'll be gone
Edited by Northernsoul (08/26/04 12:30 PM)
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 vampirism
Stranger
 
Registered: 03/14/04
Posts: 8,120
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Re: Bush vs Kerry (Fight Club Match) [Re: Northernsoul]
#3053398 - 08/26/04 12:29 PM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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yes.
fundamentalists christians are fanatical and will assassinate kerry, or gang up on him
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Northernsoul
Your Reality
Registered: 11/17/01
Posts: 2,290
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Re: Bush vs Kerry (Fight Club Match) [Re: vampirism]
#3053406 - 08/26/04 12:32 PM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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Well, you have to guess as if they were allowed to duke it out untill the very end, when one guy taps out, or just cannot move anymore.
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When it comes
I'll know, I know
Just take my clothes and leave
And I'll be gone
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JesusChrist
Son Of God
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Re: Bush vs Kerry (Fight Club Match) [Re: Northernsoul]
#3053437 - 08/26/04 12:38 PM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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Bush would be AWOL from the fight, but he will still win. Kerry would be eliminated on a self inflicted wound. He would then write himself a commendation for that wound, and later go on to protest the outcome of the fight.
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Tastes just like chicken
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Northernsoul
Your Reality
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Posts: 2,290
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Re: Bush vs Kerry (Fight Club Match) [Re: JesusChrist]
#3053472 - 08/26/04 12:45 PM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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Yeah and kerry would start chasing Bush down from airport to airport as Bush flew around the world causing havok and building his empire!
But no, they fight, and thats all. Who would win?
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JesusChrist
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Re: Bush vs Kerry (Fight Club Match) [Re: Northernsoul]
#3053526 - 08/26/04 12:56 PM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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How the fuck would I know? Would anyone pick a candidate that they don't like? Put them in a cage and put it on pay per view, and let all the proceeds go to the national debt.
I think Georgie boy could take him. Liberals are soft, and conservatives are real men.
I would like to see a young Charleton Heston beat the shit out of that fat ass Michael Moore. It would be a different outcome than when Moore took him on during the onset of dimensia. That Moore is some credible journalist, going after a guy that is losing his mind.
I would also like to see Jenna Bush mudwrestle with Martha Stewart. Hell, I just want to see them both naked and rubbing each others bodies with baby oil.
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Tastes just like chicken
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Northernsoul
Your Reality
Registered: 11/17/01
Posts: 2,290
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Re: Bush vs Kerry (Fight Club Match) [Re: JesusChrist]
#3053567 - 08/26/04 01:04 PM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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I would also like to see Jenna Bush mudwrestle with Martha Stewart. Hell, I just want to see them both naked and rubbing each others bodies with baby oil.
Yeah, and licking eachothers cunts. I bet Martha will be doing some of that comming up hey?
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When it comes
I'll know, I know
Just take my clothes and leave
And I'll be gone
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Divided_Sky
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Re: Bush vs Kerry (Fight Club Match) [Re: Northernsoul]
#3054421 - 08/26/04 05:12 PM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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I think Kerry would put up a good fight because he would get all riled up, plus he is a tall guy, but Bush is in better physical shape so I bet he would win. Kerry would complain it wasn't fair so they would call in Howard Dean, who's rage would supercharge him into a Supersayen with superhuman strength! Aargh! But he would lose too because Bush would tag team with Arnold.
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zappaisgod
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Re: Bush vs Kerry (Fight Club Match) [Re: Northernsoul]
#3054612 - 08/26/04 05:53 PM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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Did you see the spazz throw out the first pitch at Fenway? Bush'd kill him.
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Meat_Log_Smurf
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Registered: 01/31/03
Posts: 1,144
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Re: Bush vs Kerry (Fight Club Match) [Re: JesusChrist]
#3056417 - 08/27/04 12:43 AM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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LMFAO thats so true! I really think that Kerry would win. Kerry's face is made of playdough. I think any punches landed by Bush would stick in Kerry's face allowing Kerry free reign on Bush's head. Personally I think old Dick would beat the shit outta both of them if he didn't have a heart attack in the process.
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JesusChrist
Son Of God
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Re: Bush vs Kerry (Fight Club Match) [Re: Meat_Log_Smurf]
#3056733 - 08/27/04 02:19 AM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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And you could be damn sure that Dick would kick them when they were down. I can picture the jack boot pendulum swinging away at some facial blows with the little grin that grinch gets going. You might not like that, but you gotta respect it.
I would also like to see Arnold take on the country of France. We could let them have Belgium, which would make it even.
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Tastes just like chicken
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Xlea321
Stranger
Registered: 02/25/01
Posts: 9,134
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Re: Bush vs Kerry (Fight Club Match) [Re: JesusChrist]
#3056771 - 08/27/04 02:36 AM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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Arnold is dependent on a pigs valve to keep his heart pumping. His fighting days, if he ever had any, are long over.
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Don't worry, B. Caapi
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Northernsoul
Your Reality
Registered: 11/17/01
Posts: 2,290
Loc: Inner Eye
Last seen: 13 years, 4 months
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Re: Bush vs Kerry (Fight Club Match) [Re: Xlea321]
#3058138 - 08/27/04 12:44 PM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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funny 
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