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Shop: Original Sensible Seeds USA West Coast Strains   Unfolding Nature Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order

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I am worried about my friend
    #3029023 -

My friend is messed up. My family and my other friend is all he has. He comes from a family of alcoholics/addicts. His mother abandoned him and left him with his gram. His father comitted suicide when he was a young boy. He has had trouble with beer since we were 16. Whitch led to other things. He became addicted to crack. Now he battles with the aftermath of that period every day. He still blowes it sometimes. Normaly when he is realy drunk. He just will never refuse it. He doesnt remember at the time of getting it what it makes him feel like when he does it. He gets so sad coming off it... That he wishes he did enough to kill him. He has gone threw 14 grams in one night. I feel that he feels there is no hope in life no way out of debt no where to go. I see the sadnes in his eyes and it makes me wanna cry or just look away.

He says that the three of us is all he has in this world. How can I help him and still live my life the way I need to live it. Meaning not here where I grew up but most likely on the west coast or up north or even another contenent. How can I save him?

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Re: I am worried about my friend [Re: Corporal Kielbasa]
    #3029202 -

You cant really save him.Only he can save himself.The only thing you can do is to try to get him to see the err of his ways and support him if he does want to change.But if he doesnt want to change there isnt anything you can do for him. :frown:


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Do not desire to reach a high level.Rather work without thought of reward to iron out flaws and impurities in one's self for the sake of one's self.When one has done this one needs not to desire anymore. http://www.lifeforceonlinestore.com/yc/

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Re: I am worried about my friend [Re: Corporal Kielbasa]
    #3031524 -

You cant do anthng but be his friend and do what you can to help.

Maybe you need to suggest rehab to him, and tell him just how important it is to you that he gets through it.

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Re: I am worried about my friend [Re: Corporal Kielbasa]
    #3042597 -

sorry the hear about your friend
there is alot of past issues that he has to get over, maybe you can suggest some therapy or something to help him get over it, then he might be able to see his addictions.
all you can do is tell him how much you care about him and love him, and that there are alot of people around him that feels the same and will do anything to help him out and everything that happened in his past is not his fault not his doing.
tell him that there is a place in this world for him.
nelson mandaala once said "in order for you to become something you go to know what it is to be nothing"
this truely could be a turning point in his life

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Re: I am worried about my friend [Re: Corporal Kielbasa]
    #3048789 -

your a good soul.  But know its not up to you to save him, you can guide him you can help him but you can't necessarily save him.  He has to help himself.  Just let him know that there are positive things in life and that there are people that do care about him.  Therapy or rehab may be a good idea.  Don't worry there's plenty of time to live your life as well.....keep in mind, your doing it right now...your learning and experiencing life...you'll get to where your going, you'll see :wink:

:heart:


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~Earth is the Insane Asylum of the Universe~

A closed mind is a wonderful thing to lose.

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Re: I am worried about my friend [Re: Corporal Kielbasa]
    #3049964 -

You are not the one who can help him. He must want to help himself, then he is the only one who can do it. You can be there for him and give him support but that is all you can do. I know from experience. He will look you in the face and lie to you tell you he wants to straighten up. He will think of a million reasons for you to loan him money, don't give in for you will be supporting his habit. good luck everybody needs a friend like you.


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Live each day like it will be your last, tomorrow my never come.
SporeSmart

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Re: I am worried about my friend [Re: UncleMike]
    #3063260 -

I guess I never been true to him. Never told him how I felt about what he does. Always was just a timid witness to his and our trials in life.
I need to be true to myself and him by telling him what I think of what he does. I never want to piss people off so I stay quiet. I know I need to tell him how we feel.

My house is the safe house for him and my mother is his confedaunt, he has come here crying and my mom was his mom. She always told him how it is but I think he needs to know how his friends feel about it.

Thaks eveyone for helping out. Sometimes I need some extra imput.

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Re: I am worried about my friend [Re: Corporal Kielbasa]
    #3064451 -

You are right. You need to tell him. Let him know you will support his recovery but not his habit. Be there for when he falls on his face, for this will surely happen.
I hope he realizes how lucky he is to have friends like you and your mom.


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Live each day like it will be your last, tomorrow my never come.
SporeSmart

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Re: I am worried about my friend [Re: UncleMike]
    #3064529 -

He has fallin on his face countless times. It is just getting on my nerves. The other day he cracks open a beer while we are driving. This is after he has gotten 2 DUI's and a couple car crashes. Hes like I am what I is and they aint going to stop me. I just sighed. From now on im goin to be like a drill sargent and shape his ass up.

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Re: I am worried about my friend [Re: Corporal Kielbasa]
    #3064731 -

My house is always a drop in center for kids that just aren't dealing well or have no where to go...I have a new girl living in my room :smile: she's neat, and like your mom, my mom is her main confident, and more like a mom to her then her real mom is.  So I have some idea where your coming from.  Even when its alot to take....its still nice to be able to help someone.


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~Earth is the Insane Asylum of the Universe~

A closed mind is a wonderful thing to lose.

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Re: I am worried about my friend [Re: Gillette]
    #3065578 -

Its a hard life your friend has lived. I too was aboaned by my parents and raised by my grandmother and it is very hard to cope with I still have problems when i hear my friends talk about their parents. He needs to cpe with that and drugs are not the anwser like every one else has said ask him to seek help, hes only piling the shit higher for himself, better he deals with it sooner than latter.


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I work my shitty 9-5 and I pay my taxes, I'm not hurting anybody else. So why do you care what i do in my spare time.

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Re: I am worried about my friend [Re: Protester]
    #3065610 -

Protester said:
Its a hard life your friend has lived. I too was aboaned by my parents and raised by my grandmother and it is very hard to cope with I still have problems when i hear my friends talk about their parents. He needs to cpe with that and drugs are not the anwser like every one else has said ask him to seek help, hes only piling the shit higher for himself, better he deals with it sooner than latter.


piling shit isnt a good habit... it always falls all over you

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Re: I am worried about my friend [Re: Gillette]
    #3067765 -

Gillette is your computer working again?

Protester if you where around id give ya a big ol hug.

I know he will be alright. He just scares me sometimes.

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Re: I am worried about my friend [Re: Corporal Kielbasa]
    #3068516 -

nope computer is still busted :frown: I'm trying to get someone to fix it in the next week or two, I need it for school and stuff.


--------------------
~Earth is the Insane Asylum of the Universe~

A closed mind is a wonderful thing to lose.

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Re: I am worried about my friend [Re: Gillette]
    #3074961 -

Np we all have problems and need some one to talk to sometimes.


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I work my shitty 9-5 and I pay my taxes, I'm not hurting anybody else. So why do you care what i do in my spare time.

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Re: I am worried about my friend [Re: Gillette]
    #3075130 -

you guys are learning a valuable lesson from your mothers. Each of you are very lucky.


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Live each day like it will be your last, tomorrow my never come.
SporeSmart

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Re: I am worried about my friend [Re: UncleMike]
    #3076159 -

UncleMike said:
Each of you are very lucky.


Thanks she is definetly some one I admire. :thumbup:

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Shop: Original Sensible Seeds USA West Coast Strains   Unfolding Nature Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order

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