Auto-SummaryThis forum post recounts a tumultuous relationship where the narrator's girlfriend, a 19-year-old college student, engages in unprotected sex with an older man during a night out, potentially exposing both to sexually transmitted diseases, including HIV. The girlfriend, who has been on birth control, never informed the narrator about the encounter, which occurred a month ago. The narrator expresses deep betrayal and concern over the potential health risks, questioning the girlfriend's judgment and selfishness. The post highlights the girlfriend's jealousy issues and her tendency to prioritize social rebellion over their relationship. The narrator is devastated, fearing the long-term health implications and the impact on their relationship. They urge the girlfriend to get tested for HIV and other STDs, emphasizing the gravity of the situation and the potential for devastating consequences.
is how i feel.
the reason im posting this is i have this need to get it off my chest, but i was asked not to. so, i suppose its alright if i discuss it anonymously on a message board with total strangers and hopefully unbiased opinions.
Meet my girlfiend. when she and i got together, we were both virgins. At first, we used condoms because i thought it the safest and wisest thing to do. Then, as the sex in our relationship turned toward a more 'ritual' or often-occuring routine i started not using condoms.
i then realized the idiocy in that idea, so my girlfriend went to her family doctor and is now on birth control (the pill). So, we've been having sex for quite some time without a condom. especially, since we are renting a house together.
the dilemna at hand:
my girlfriends life is basically going to school (college) and work (shitty waitress job) all day. she never has time to do any of the activites i get involved in, and half expects me to not do them because she cant. one of the only real faults she has is this HUge jealousy ordeal. because of the jealousy flaw, she thinks i fool around with females at some of the gatherings i attend (festivals, partys...) even though i've told her i have never cheated on her and will tell her the day i do.
*drones on*
so, one day my jobs fires me. i was hired on as a temp, worked there for over 3 months, and to make a long story short was fired because i didnt meet the corporate standard on appearance. my friend who had been working with had been working there for over 6 months, and was a full time employee. they fired him the next day because he "didn't meet" their "expectations". I just turned 19, i have long hair, and we were the youngest people there. ok... enough justifying my elimination.
*drones on*
so, the day my friend A got fired he showed up at my house with friend B. Friend A had shaved half his head in out-right personal rebellion for the injustice done to him. (they even fired us a week before christmas.) Friend A, had this sporatic and spontaneous idea of going to Daytona for the night and dropping acid. I was in a depressed state and went along because it was something i needed to do. believe it or not, it was theraputic. my girlfriend went to work on bad terms with me, so i left her a note that i was leaving for the night and i would be back tomorrow. needless to say, i walked the beach till sunrise and was back in the morning.
to "repay" me for the night i had, on my girlfriends night off of work she went with a friend to a "club" in orlando. it was her first time going to a club and it is not her scene at all, but she wanted to rebel agaisnt me. she was envious of all the times i went to "have fun" with my friends. the difference in what my girlfriend did is that she told me she would be back that night, so i stayed up until 5 AM waiting for her to come home. I went to sleep and she shows up around 11 am. I can sense that she's upset in some way, but i assumed it was because she was assuming i was mad about her absence for the whole night and morning. i asked her what she did, and i even asked her if she cheated on me. she said no, and that was good enough for me.
she had spent the night in a motel.
*drones on*
since my girlfriend is a waitress, she is constantly being hit on by other men. what she didnt tell me about that night, and what she just broke down and told me yesterday is that she, in a moment of dislike for me, invited one of the older guys that always hits on her with her to the club. she had sex with a man around the age of 36 years old. my girlfriend, who is always jealous... who constantly ridicules me if a girl talks to me... who claims she still and will always loves me... who Claims the man took 'advantage' of her... intimidated her... she claims that she didnt like it and just sat there while he penetrated her...
the worst of it, she didnt use a condom. i credit that to us not having used a condom for about 94 percent of our sex life, and her having birth-control. the worst of it all is, she didnt tell me and had sex with me afterwards... not using a condom. yesterday, when she told me is almost a month later. we've had sex atleast twice since that night. my girlfriend is a fucking idiot. what if this guy has HIV or some other kind of STD? when i brought that up, she burst into tears because she never even considered the possibility. especially, when i pointed out that she fucked me over by having sex with me afterwards. What do you think the chances of this older guy had an STD of some sort? most importanly, what if this guy has HIV or AIDs? Do you think someone who knowingly has HIV would have unprotected sex with a 19 yr old female? would anyone be that selfish... that ignorant? i told her to set up an appointment for a test. she called a 1-800 number and they said the price for both an HIV and STD test would cost somewhere around 300 dollars. she cant go to her family doctor because she fears the doctor talking to her parents about the results (especially if it comes back positive for drugs). am i over-reacting? why was she so fucking stupid? she's even briefly talked about killing herself if she finds out she has HIV and she ruined my life with her own selfish blind stupidity.
i think my fate will be a paranoia for some years to come. i've heard that HIV can not show up for a couple years, and the lady at the 1-800 number said something about atleast 4-months. the whole possibility of it truly teriffies me because its totally unexpected.
apologies for droning on, and thanks for listening.
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