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Community > Physical and Mental Well-Being
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One of my best friends
    #2196512 -

Well, today as I'm about to head out, I get a text message from my friend (we'll call him A). A informs me that his g/f (and also my closest friend of the other sex) doesn't want to come camping with us, and I quote - "I don't want to waste my week with a bunch of drug fucked people".
Here's the background - A and his g/f don't use drugs, A used to, and doesn't smoke pot anymore (but doesn't ever bitch at me about it, he's totally sweet with it); they both drink and smoke cigs. Most of my friends drink and smoke cigs (and don't smoke pot, etc). A has wanted to do an acid trip for a while, so him and me will be doing a trip together with me and one other person and her b/f (this other person is the only other one that does drugs on a regular basis, but she doesn't hang around with us that much).
Anyways, this is no different from any other camping trips we've gone on - it's usually only one or 2 people who will be doing drugs (including alcohol), so it's not like she'll be surrounded by people doing drugs the entire week. I completely fired up at her - sent her a msg quoting what she said, and said "Alcohol is a drug. If that's how you feel about me, then quite frankly you can go fuck yourself". Her b/f (A) got all shitty at me, saying that I have no right to say that to her (oh yeah.... I'll just pretend I didn't get completely insulted by my best friend). I told him that I had every right to, and that if I turned around and said to him "I don't want to waste my week camping with a bunch of piss heads" then he would have every right to abuse me.
This really pisses me off - she's basically the closest female friend I've EVER had in my 21 years of being alive and now I have her refusing to come camping because I smoke pot and do acid/shrooms on occasion. She herself went through a stage of HEAVY drinking when I first knew her and I never once judged her or said I didn't want to spend time with her. I'm also the only non smoker in the group, so everytime I go out, I usually have to inhale large amounts of second hand cig smoke - but I never once said I didn't want to spend time with them because of it.
What the hell am I meant to do when my closest friend is getting more and more intolerant towards what you do with your life? If things go downhill from here, then I'll lose 2 friends, because my other friend who I've known for a lot longer than her is going out with her, and has been with her for close to 2 years now.

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Re: One of my best friends [Re: Sheepish]
    #2196541 -

I've had friends that if they found out that I was into LSD/Mushrooms/Marijuana etc., they would not be my friend.

The problem is society and the media, making these people believe that drugs are wrong.

Our society seems to be based on if it feels good, do it. (mainly sex, but still) But when it comes to drugs, they go completely in a different direction.

Hopefully some day things will change once the truth becomes known.

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Re: One of my best friends [Re: HidingInPlainSight]
    #2196556 -

The thing is, I've known her for over 3 years, and she's known that I do drugs the whole time. It hurts that 3 years down the line, she decides to get all high and mighty about it. If we didn't have a solid history of friendship, I would not miss her. But because she's the closest female friend I've EVER had in my life, then it's a bit harder.

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Re: One of my best friends [Re: Sheepish]
    #2196613 -

Maybe something has happened to someone she loved that was drug related? Maybe she is using the criticism towards you in hopes that you change?
Women are very complex too I might add.  :smirk:

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Re: One of my best friends [Re: HidingInPlainSight]
    #2196645 -

She has a history of very heavy drug use when she was a young teen. Not just doing drugs, but abusing the hell out of everything. Smoking pot all day, doing acid at least 4 times a week, and numerous other things - and this was when she was around 13 or 14.
I appreciate if she's concerned, but she's known me long enough to know that I have good self control. Last time I did acid was nearly a year ago, I smoke pot maybe once or twice a week. Sometimes I go without. I know lots of people that make my pot intake laughable.
And you're damn right - women are complex creatures :wink:

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Re: One of my best friends [Re: Sheepish]
    #2196674 -

Or maybe since she knows that drug use CAN (not often) lead to drug abuse, she is using the constructive criticism approach as a way of telling you she cares and doesn't want anything bad to happen to you.
Or maybe she was just feeling irritable then, you never really know with all the possibilities. You can take the remark one of two ways, 1)take it as constructive criticism or 2) disregard the comment.

-ledzepln86

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Re: One of my best friends [Re: HidingInPlainSight]
    #2196699 -

I think I'll disregard it - she believes acid remains in your spine. Firmly believes this, despite doing the drug herself.
Her b/f is a pretty much an alcoholic - gets drunk during the week, and on the weekends. If he's not getting drunk, he's drinking a lot of beer. He found it extremely difficult to go a month without alcohol. He gets drunk while he's on antibiotics. He's also quite overweight, and smokes cigs. I don't hold this against him because I enjoy his company and as far as I'm concerned it's HIS body, but it's sad that she doesn't find this a concern, whereas my occassional use is enough for her to not want to spend time with me. She should be more concerned that her b/f might end up with liver failure or drop dead within the next 10 years.
It's seriously backwards.

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Re: One of my best friends [Re: Sheepish]
    #2198055 -

Sounds like you made a good decision by disregarding the comments.
Stay in there Sheepish!  :grin:

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