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Registered: 12/12/03
Posts: 1
Last seen: 14 years, 4 months
Bad Trip Questions
    #2173827 - 12/13/03 12:37 AM (14 years, 4 months ago)

Ok, this is going to get wordy, but only so I can get the best answer out of you guys.
I used to grow my own mushrooms, Id done about 4 trips (1 - 2 grams each) never really saw stuff,
was just a good enjoyable high. A year ago, after finishing exams, 4 of us all did about 3 grams of my
own mushrooms. It was the most stupid thing ive ever done. It was a bad atmosphere (people there i
didnt feel comfortable with), I was totatally stressed out and not in the right state of mind.
The high hit really hard and sudden, and it made me panic. Basically, the next 2 hours were very very rough,
and I think I had my first real panic attack in my life during this high. The high was just too intense
and I couldnt deal with it. After I started to come down I felt much more calm and even enjoyed the physical
side effects of the high. Ive always been somewhat of a hypocondriact (sp?), so during this high, I was
in absolute terror that I had lost my mind and would be crazy for the rest of my life. Of course, this didnt
happen but that fear and insecurity has never quite let me (that I fucked up my brain somehow).
The rest of the the school year went without incident. After my spring exams, I went home for the
summer. The first two nights I was at home I had what I can best describe as panic attacks. From my under
standing of 'flashbacks', these were not it. I was just panicing (I am a fairly anxious person, especially
socially). Of course, these panic attacks did remind me of panicking during my mushroom trip, so I was
totally freaked out that I was having a flashback, or something fucked up related to that bad trip.
The next morning I woke up feeling fine and the rest of the summer was great. I can honestly say I had
the best time of my life that summer.
In the fall I went back to school. And heres when the problems started. It was about 8 weeks into
the program. (3rd year aerospace engineering) Needless to say I was extremely stressed out. And there was
a dozen other things going on in my life, not to mention I was very unhappy with school, especially after
having such an awsome, happy summer. So one day during class (I had to go home that day for my sisters wedding
where I would see a lot of family from Europe that I dont see often - anxiety) I basically had a nervous break
down. I just totally panicked. I had to leave the room and gather my senses. That was almost two months
ago. Since that panic attack (or anxiety attack or nervous break down...) I have been an absolute mess.
Extremely anxious, I didnt want to go to class (although being around people always made me feel better when
I could relax) I was somewhat paranoid (trying to find out what the hell was wrong with me)... and basically
just a shit load of fear and panic. I often fear (and panic) that my bad mushroom trip had a lot to do with
this. But when I actually get a grip and rationalize it all out, I find that hard to believe.
Anyway, this is a fear Ive carried with me for long enough (one year now) and I just want to let it go.
Im having strong symptoms of depersonalization (which I never had before my breakdown) and im just tired of
having this fear/anxiety on my mind. I can deal with the fact that I fucked my self up by overstressing my
self because of school and bad life style. But when I have that thought that this is all because of my bad
mushrooms trip I just fucking loose it, I feel like ive ruined my life and that I might as well give up now.
Give me your opinions on this. Do you think my current situation (and nervous breakdown) have anything
to do with my horrible trip a year ago. As im writting this the question seems silly to me. But its just a
fear that I have and I need to hear other peoples opinions. And tell me about how you were able to let go
of the fears from your own bad trips. I havent done mushrooms since this bad trip and never will, but I
would be lying if I said I didnt enjoy the good ones, and I want to have a positive memory of those experiences
on the whole... Anyway, sorry this was so long, but I really need your advice now!

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Registered: 11/27/03
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Re: Bad Trip Questions [Re: Mauder]
    #2173980 - 12/13/03 02:20 AM (14 years, 4 months ago)

hmmmmmm... The first time I tripped I did 3 grams, and at one point I really thought I has gone insane. I was thinking "this is how people in insane asylums are all the time, and I am now one of them and now everybody sees me as one of them, WHAT THE FUCK I CANT FUNCTION IN SOCIETY LIKE THIS!!!"

Anyway, that trip was not a bad one, but at that moment things were really scary. You have to understand that many people have bad experiences on shrooms, and that you're not the only one. You probably learned things during that trip that you are still not willing to accept. I really think you're just going to have to sort things out yourself, but believe me, although you might be lost in a tunnel now, it is possible for you, and anyone if that tunnel, to find the exit within themselves. The exit does infact exist, it is called peace, so will find it, but you truly have to look for it.

(and remember, life is a wonderful thing and we live it to experience many great things, this experience will only make you wiser.)

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Carpal Tunnel
Registered: 08/30/99
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Re: Bad Trip Questions [Re: Mauder]
    #2174471 - 12/13/03 11:51 AM (14 years, 4 months ago)

dr abram hoffer has had good results giving his patients vitamins & minerals (especially niacinamide &/or niacin, both forms of vitamin B3)
do a search around here, or a googlesearch on the web, for info on his work & books & such...

old enough to know better
not old enough to care

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Re: Bad Trip Questions [Re: Mauder]
    #2193703 - 12/21/03 12:15 AM (14 years, 4 months ago)

yes bad trips occur, they suck. but you won't die (unless you do something really stupid) My worst trip was me alone in my room contemplating whether the mushrooms were in fact growing me. INSANE! I learned a hell of a lot about myself and the people I'm around, so although I considered it a "bad" trip, there wasn't really anything bad besides the extreme anxiety and worrisome. Having someone with you that you feel comfortble talking too really helps in those times of need. Don't keep thinking the shrooms had something to do with it, they are a fairly benign (as most people here can attest) entheogen and phsychedelic with no proven ill effects both long and short term.  Try examining where else in your life all this anxiety and panic may stem from (other than the obvious trip). I've said to myself on numerous occasions following a "bad" trip that I would never do them again...but. :smirk:

Wee, sleeket, cowran, tim'rous beastie,
O, what panic's in thy breastie!
Thou need na start awa sae hasty,
Wi' bickering brattle!

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Re: Bad Trip Questions [Re: Mauder]
    #2194657 - 12/21/03 10:51 PM (14 years, 4 months ago)

Its not the mushrooms, your just a nerotic mess that needs to get a grip.  :smile2: More mushroom could even help with this, but only if you aproach the experience from a rational perspective. If you use them the way hippies use them you will only become more confused.

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Registered: 12/18/03
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Re: Bad Trip Questions [Re: Mauder]
    #2195188 - 12/22/03 08:29 AM (14 years, 4 months ago)

I'm there with ya! It's taken me 12 years to deal with my bad Trip! Take your time determin what your goals are ect. My Bad Trip was because I was not sure why I was doing it. I was just bord, and had 4 hits of acid laying around during winter break and decided. What the hell! Not good to play with the power tools of god! Any way here is what I've previoulsy posted about how I've delt with it and how I'm finaly planing a trip again!
Previous Trip was 12 years ago with LSD. Very Very Bad Trip. I fought the whole experance. Previous to that i had had 3 low does lsd trips and they were great. I've been working on the issues reading many books on religion and such. Also have been seeing a Transpersonal therapist to work through issues (Transpersonal Psychology deals more with religions or human undersatnding and realities similar to secular huminism)The goal of this prosses is to again take an ethnogin and try and work through my issues with my fear and such. The therapist has agreed to meet after I injest and then take me to his private cabin in the woods, so that I can get out doors if nessassary without any concerns of walking in the city. And also I then have a baby sitter who knows my issues and also has had many of the same experances with ethnogins.

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Re: Bad Trip Questions [Re: Ginseng]
    #2195760 - 12/22/03 03:38 PM (14 years, 4 months ago)


Ginseng said:
hmmmmmm... I was thinking "this is how people in insane asylums are all the time, and I am now one of them and now everybody sees me as one of them, WHAT THE FUCK I CANT FUNCTION IN SOCIETY LIKE THIS!!!"

Anyway, that trip was not a bad one, but at that moment things were really scary. 

I'll second that, I had the exact same thoughts.  For me, a good analogy was my first orgasm.  As it happened, I was confused and terrified at first, because it was the most intense sensation I had thusfar experienced.  But as I let go, it turned...um... orgasmic  :confused: :tongue:  The world on shrooms comes in with fewer filters, so everything takes on an extremely heightened significance.  Its intense as hell, but wonderful.  Perhaps you should get some counceling for your anxiety disorder.

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Re: Bad Trip Questions [Re: pyramid314]
    #2196913 - 12/23/03 01:11 AM (14 years, 4 months ago)

In my experience, bad trips usually come when you FIGHT IT. I've been to the Void (900 mg DXM + 3 bowls of dank), and it only became hell because I fought the dissolution of myself. I felt myself slipping away, and I wasn't prepared for UNEXISTENCE. I fought against the dying of the light, and once "I" (as there was no longer an I) returned from nothingness, all I knew was fear. My only other bad trip was off 6-7 grams of extremely potent mushrooms (some users of the same batch had earth-shattering trips off half 8ths). Once again I fought it, driven by my ego's reluctance to die. I fell screaming and flailing into oblivion. The time that was actually spent on a somewhat recognizable plane of existence was filled with terrifying hallucinations of a post-apocalyptic world where everyone and everything was designed to make me suffer. People appeared to be mocking me, mocking everything about my life. I became convinced I was in some self-conceived hell, and this only served to drive me further into chaos and insanity. Essentially I was responsible for my bad trip, I LET it happen. Sure the drug took me to an extremely intense place, but the fear and the panic was my own reaction. I guess what I'm saying is, DON'T FIGHT IT. Don't let the drugs win. If you can't handle the intensity, don't step up to the plate. But I think you'll find that the human mind is capable of handling incredible things. The fact that I'm still here makes me take comfort. So give yourself a little credit, and if you're going to go tumbling down the rabbit hole, leave fear at the surface. Simply let the experience engulf you, let it BE you. That's the best advice this seasoned tripper can give. Happy trippin to you all. Peace.

"Turn on, tune in, drop out." --Dr. Timothy Leary

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Registered: 05/26/03
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Re: Bad Trip Questions [Re: Mauder]
    #2199073 - 12/24/03 04:08 AM (14 years, 4 months ago)

1.- Relax and don?t take life so seriously.
2.- Never trip with people you don?t know or you don?t like. I prefer to trip alone cause every person gets different trips and people can get paranoid/anxious while you are relaxed and having a nice time and this can disturb your good mood.
3.- I don?t think is a problem of mushrooms or bad trip. If you were allready paranoid/social anxious or whatever, I think mushrooms are not your drug for right now cause they are not going to do any good. I would try to fight those fears in a normal state of conscience (drug free). And don?t take it so hard, it?s not bad to not like people, the problem is when you feel bad about it.
4.- It?s important to feel OK with yourself when eating shrooms. I?ve done them always this way and never had a bad trip and hope will not.


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