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Offlinestudent
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Registered: 09/26/03
Posts: 137
Last seen: 12 years, 11 days
Telling my family?
    #2111122 - 11/16/03 11:08 AM (13 years, 26 days ago)

I have been using psychedelics for almost a year now. And they have changed me. I think that I am becoming a much better person from what I have learned. And I would like to tell my family this.
I love my family with all of my heart, and I would hate to hurt them. But I feel that I need to tell them about my "drug" use. The things I have seen and felt are so beautiful. My family deserves to know. But even though I believe that what I am doing is right, I think my family won't share this with me.
What are your experiences with this? How can I tell my family without hurting them? I would love to be able to share the gifts I have received with my family.

thank you,
student


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Offlinecastaway
Isanybodyreallyhome?
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Re: Telling my family? [Re: student]
    #2111139 - 11/16/03 11:20 AM (13 years, 26 days ago)

I would love to share 'who I am' with my family, but unfortunately I don't think 'what I am' exists within the parameters they find acceptable....therefore I find it preferable to err on the side of kindness... I suppose one day I may pick-up on a vibe that expresses a desire to know 'me' as I am...untill then I guess I shall remain; Your's truly, Castaway.


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Offlinesykobish
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Re: Telling my family? [Re: student]
    #2111144 - 11/16/03 11:24 AM (13 years, 26 days ago)

If you don't think your family will respond in a positive way, then why would you want to cause yourself some unneeded stress? Don't get me wrong, i believe that honesty is the best policy.. but maybe you should take a deeper look at what you are about to do. Weigh the pros and cons.. and if you feel that you still want to tell them, then do it. Just be ready to face the consequences afterwards. My parents are very open minded people. I'm blessed to not have to worry about things like that.


--------------------
I would rather have had one breath of her hair, one kiss from her mouth, one touch of her hand, than eternity without it. One.
-={Nite-Crew}=-

*-_Thread_Jacker_-*
To love is to admire with the heart; to admire is to love with the mind. - Th?ophile Gautier.
Seek not every quality in one individual - Confucius.
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Offlinestudent
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Registered: 09/26/03
Posts: 137
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Re: Telling my family? [Re: sykobish]
    #2111178 - 11/16/03 11:55 AM (13 years, 26 days ago)

So your family knows about your use of psychedelics? How did you tell them?
I am looking for a good way to teach my family; not clear my conscience. I would love to share my personal life with them, but I cannot do so until I know it will be right.
I am trying to find a way to do this correctly. I want to share this gift with them. I have spent countless hours trying to figure out how to do this. But I have not found the answers. And I am asking for help, so they will understand. Don't they deserve the same help I was given?

thank you,
student


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Offlinejong21
Mycologist/CSMajor

Registered: 05/28/03
Posts: 576
Loc: Berkeley, CA
Last seen: 11 years, 9 months
Re: Telling my family? [Re: student]
    #2111344 - 11/16/03 01:48 PM (13 years, 26 days ago)

Think of it this way...do you think telling your family this would cause them pain? If so, do you think telling them, which seems to be a personal thing, for you...it isn't like they really NEED to know, so do you think telling them is worth the pain and worry they will feel in hearing this. Do you think this is a selfish desire for you, or will it benefit everyone? Do you even think it is possible they will understand? I know my mom would never understand, and my dad just follows my mom, even though he's done some drugs in his days. Sorry for all the questions but important things to think about.


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I either talk about my friends in the first or third person, but I never, ever talk about myself on this website. Except that last sentence.


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Offlinestudent
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Re: Telling my family? [Re: jong21]
    #2111538 - 11/16/03 03:05 PM (13 years, 26 days ago)

But how can such useful knowledge be kept secret from those which you love? I know that it would hurt my family to tell them now. But now is not the time.
I want to share the gift of psychedelics with the people I love most in this world. I am looking for a way to tell them in which they will understand. Mind you, it is not just my parents. I also have two brothers and a sister. Our ages are 53, 49, 25, 21, 19, 15. If even one of them understood I would be sucessful. Please help.

thank you,
student


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Offlinejong21
Mycologist/CSMajor

Registered: 05/28/03
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Re: Telling my family? [Re: student]
    #2111544 - 11/16/03 03:09 PM (13 years, 26 days ago)

Share the gift with people who have the possibility of appreciating it though. Do you think you're family would ever use psychedelics, specifically your parents? If you honestly think your brother and sister could benefit then tell them. I've tried to spread the good word on psychedelics, but the reality is not everyone will be open to it. It doesn't mean you shouldn't try, but is it worth trying with your parents?


--------------------
I either talk about my friends in the first or third person, but I never, ever talk about myself on this website. Except that last sentence.


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Offlinestudent
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Re: Telling my family? [Re: jong21]
    #2111593 - 11/16/03 03:29 PM (13 years, 26 days ago)

How can you not try with the two people who made you what you are? I owe everything that I am to my parents. Every day that goes by I feel like I am lying by not telling my family what I have been doing. I am not looking for justification! I am looking for a way to teach my family the good that can come from psychedelics. It is a gift that was given to me by two of my best friends. And I want to share this gift with my family.

Let me expand my question. How have you shared the gift of psychedelics with others? Is there a way to show someone how to learn from these "drugs"?

And thank you to everyone that has responded. You have helped me more than you could ever know.

thank you,
student


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Offlinestudent
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Re: Telling my family? [Re: jong21]
    #2111622 - 11/16/03 03:38 PM (13 years, 26 days ago)

One day, yes, I hope to share this with my family. I hope that one day my whole family will trip together and be closer than we have ever been. My goal in life is to share this gift with as many people as I can. But how could I ever share it with anyone, unless I have shown my family what I do? How can we ever expect to change the world, if we cannot even change the people who know us best?

thank you,
student


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Offlinesirreal
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Re: Telling my family? [Re: student]
    #2111728 - 11/16/03 04:11 PM (13 years, 26 days ago)

Man, I know what you mean!


I would love to share my experiences with everyone that I love. But we have to be careful.

They are likely to blame every problem you have on your mushroom experiences. Be careful!


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I may not always tell the truth, but atleast I'm honest
-----------

I see what everyone is saying. It is so hard to form an opinion when you see both sides so clearly!


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Invisibledownforpot
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Re: Telling my family? [Re: sirreal]
    #2111779 - 11/16/03 04:30 PM (13 years, 26 days ago)

I never tell my family anything, my parents don't know anything about me, whenever I go somewhere I just tell them I'll be at someone's house. I will never tell them I do weed or shrooms. Fuck'em


--------------------



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Offlinestudent
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Re: Telling my family? [Re: sirreal]
    #2111928 - 11/16/03 05:22 PM (13 years, 26 days ago)

Do you think think that you could convince them that what you are doing is good? I hope to some day. Maybe this thread will help us to educate those that we love.

peace,
student

[edited for grammer]


Edited by student (11/16/03 05:41 PM)


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Offlinestudent
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Registered: 09/26/03
Posts: 137
Last seen: 12 years, 11 days
Re: Telling my family? [Re: downforpot]
    #2111990 - 11/16/03 05:39 PM (13 years, 25 days ago)

downforpot said "I never tell my family anything, my parents don't know anything about me, whenever I go somewhere I just tell them I'll be at someone's house. I will never tell them I do weed or shrooms. Fuck'em"


Do you fear your family because of the law? Maybe if we can change our families' perspective on "drug" use we can start to change the puplic's perspective.

Now there are three people looking for help. Please help us.


thank you,
student


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Offlinejong21
Mycologist/CSMajor

Registered: 05/28/03
Posts: 576
Loc: Berkeley, CA
Last seen: 11 years, 9 months
Re: Telling my family? [Re: student]
    #2112011 - 11/16/03 05:46 PM (13 years, 25 days ago)

I don't know your family, but unless your parents were part of the counter-culture when they were growing up, you have to understand that the culture of the 50s and 60s, excluding the counterculture, was SO super conservative compared to today. I know you want to share this stuff, I'd want to share it too, but I think it may bring about a real negative backlash, and I'm sure you don't want that. You should focus on spreading the good word to people who would be willing to try it, or are at least open to listening to your views on it. You can't convert everyone, so you need to pick who you go after.

I think you also have to realize that psychadelics are a very personal journey. You can't force someone to get a lot out of them. For example there are people who do them to get fucked up, or because it is "cool" and that's all. You can suggest things, places to go, music to listen to, but in the end it will be up to them to actually get something more from the experience. Likewise, you can't force your parents to understand your views. Either they experimented in college and may understand or be willing to listen, or they have never touched the stuff and at this point in their lives I'm sure the thought of temptation never crosses their mind. Either way, your parents will either have already had the opportunity to realize the power of psychadelics, or will never realize it, I don't think there is much you can do that is constructive. This is my opinion at least.

Sorry to burst your bubble, I know you care deeply for your family, but you can't force beliefs on people either. I can't get my friends to enjoy classical music, in a similar way all you can do is introduce people to the idea of it and let them take the journey if they choose. I think it is too late for your parents to choose to take the journey, and telling them will only cause a great deal of stress.

If your parents did a lot of drugs back in the day, or still do drugs, by all means that changes everything. But if they are the "just say no to drugs" type people then I don't think you have much to accomplish and should instead spread the word to your peers and even family your own age, those who realistically can, as I said, embark on the psychadelic journey if they choose.

student, it would help to know how old you are. If you are in high school, without a doubt don't do it, your parents have complete control over you and them taking it the wrong way could have drastic consequences. As you get older, maybe it will be easier, but I think you should remember that unless your parents do drugs now, your whole family tripping together isn't a realistic goal. Adults never, ever start using drugs, adults that use drugs always used them before. And people that age don't care if it is a mind expanding psychadelic or habit forming stimulant, it's all just drugs to them.

my 2 cents....


--------------------
I either talk about my friends in the first or third person, but I never, ever talk about myself on this website. Except that last sentence.


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Offlinejong21
Mycologist/CSMajor

Registered: 05/28/03
Posts: 576
Loc: Berkeley, CA
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Re: Telling my family? [Re: jong21]
    #2112019 - 11/16/03 05:49 PM (13 years, 25 days ago)

I want to rephrase my comment about how adults never start using drugs...I should be more specific, as adults can and do start using drugs, like rush limbaugh, but I think usually adults who start using drugs gravitate only towards addictive things...like rx's. I don't know of any adults using psychadelics that didn't use them in college.


--------------------
I either talk about my friends in the first or third person, but I never, ever talk about myself on this website. Except that last sentence.


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InvisibleSuffer
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Re: Telling my family? [Re: student]
    #2112024 - 11/16/03 05:53 PM (13 years, 25 days ago)

My family (well, mom n pop n stepparents and sister anyway) know of my drug use (the majority of it anyway)... i think it was obvious tho.

I moved out of my house at 16 and they knew i was going to the Telluride Mushroom Fest specifically when i moved. They didnt like it one bit, and i still know that they dont understand what it means to me (except maybe my dad and my sister).

They have finally accept that it is a part of me tho... keep in mind, this is after they sent me to several therapists, and after i went to rehab. It amazes me that I can actually talk to my parents about this stuff now, but its been 5 years or more sense they figured it out. The other day my mom was actually joking with me... she said she could never figure why i took "magic mushrooms" when i wouldn't even touch the ones she put in her food. Heh... amazing isn't it?

I would say... when the time is right for you to tell them, you will know. Don't force it, expecialy if you still live at home, as that could add a WHOLE world of trouble you didn't expect. Let it come naturaly... drop hints in conversations. They may never like it, but if its truly a part of who you are, they will accept it.... EVENTUALLY

Take your time with this... your family loves you and they may not understand. They may even take actions that are detrimental to you... thinking of corse that they are doing the "right thing"


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Offlinestudent
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Re: Telling my family? [Re: jong21]
    #2112137 - 11/16/03 06:40 PM (13 years, 25 days ago)

Jong 21 said "I'm sure the thought of temptation never crosses their mind. Either way, your parents will either have already had the opportunity to realize the power of psychadelics, or will never realize it, I don't think there is much you can do that is constructive. This is my opinion at least."
"student, it would help to know how old you are. If you are in high school, without a doubt don't do it, your parents have complete control over you and them taking it the wrong way could have drastic consequences. As you get older, maybe it will be easier, but I think you should remember that unless your parents do drugs now, your whole family tripping together isn't a realistic goal. Adults never, ever start using drugs, adults that use drugs always used them before. And people that age don't care if it is a mind expanding psychadelic or habit forming stimulant, it's all just drugs to them."


jong 21-
I am the 19 out of the 53, 49, 25, 21, 19, 15. I am in my junior year of college, and didn't start experimenting until I knew I was ready. My family has great respect for everything I do. I have not let them down so far. I have been finacially independant from my parents since I was old enough to work legally, and they let me do what I feel is right. They will love me regarless of my activities. I simply want to help in trying to teach them what I have learned.
My mother is 53, my father 49, my brothers are 25 and 21. And my little sister is 15. Hopefully that will help you in understanding my dillema. My father used psychedelics for all the wrong reasons and my mother was afraid of what her parents would do if they found out. My brothers both obstained for fear of "fucking up a good thing." My sister has been bombarded with offers to use illicite drugs, but has turned down every offer. I have no fear of my families' intentions.
All I want is a good way to approach them with the subject of my "drug" use. I truely believe that my family would partake in the sacrament of psychedelic mushrooms. Did your mother ask you if you wanted to taste the blood of the lord during first communion? Would you not ask her the same question when offering a mushroom tea? My family loved me enough to teach me the ways of the lord. But I found my own ways. Why should I keep these experiences from them?
It hurts me more than you could ever imagine, when I think about what my family is missing. Please help me to share this gift.

thank you,
student


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Offlinestudent
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Re: Telling my family? [Re: Suffer]
    #2112248 - 11/16/03 07:18 PM (13 years, 25 days ago)

How did you tell your family?

thanks,
student


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Offlinejong21
Mycologist/CSMajor

Registered: 05/28/03
Posts: 576
Loc: Berkeley, CA
Last seen: 11 years, 9 months
Re: Telling my family? [Re: student]
    #2112283 - 11/16/03 07:33 PM (13 years, 25 days ago)

Don't approach it as a conversion, like them missing something. It seems like this is more a part of you than I suspected, almost like a religion in some ways. It is up to you man, since you are out of the house and self sufficient you have less to risk...you need to do what feels right.

Good luck man.


--------------------
I either talk about my friends in the first or third person, but I never, ever talk about myself on this website. Except that last sentence.


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Offlinestudent
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Registered: 09/26/03
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Last seen: 12 years, 11 days
Re: Telling my family? [Re: jong21]
    #2112356 - 11/16/03 08:08 PM (13 years, 25 days ago)

But does feeling what is right justify hurting my family? Is there a way that I can tell my family that they will understand? Is there a way to tell them where I am coming from without hurting them?
I would rather live in pain than to cause my family undue harm. Maybe I am asking for too much. Please help.

thank you,
student


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