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Another friend died, too many funerals
    #15524750 -

A good friend of mine from Narcotics Anonymous died the other day and his funeral is today. It still hasn't really hit me, still feels really strange since I just had dinner and a great time with him last Saturday. I guess I'm thankful that my last memory of him was having a blast at a restaurant, swapping funny ass stories with one of his friends that I barely knew. And sober too.

We would talk pretty much every day, multiple times a day. Hell, I talked to him more than my sponsor. He was such an upbeat, positive person, even when talking about all the wreckage he was attempting to clean up in his life due to his years and years of drug abuse. We were talking in his car last week and we were talking about death for some reason. He had said if he died tomorrow, at least he would die clean and sober. And god dammit, he got his wish. 4 days later he had a massive heart attack.

But fuck, man this will be the 5th funeral I've been to, starting with my aunt's death in July of 09.

I gotta start figuring out what I'm going to wear.


--------------------
Same thing happened to me when I played Neil Armstrong in Moonshot. They found me in an alley in Burbank trying to re-enter the earth's atmosphere in an old refrigerator box.

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Re: Another friend died, too many funerals [Re: WakeboardrB]
    #15524809 -

Sorry to hear that. I lost one of my best friends in August due to an accidental overdose and it really sucks, especially when he was only 27. Hopefully you don't have to attend another funeral for a while.

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Re: Another friend died, too many funerals [Re: Evil Toadstool]
    #15524829 -

What did he die of


--------------------
new trade list 
my own WCA V: I

"Ha! Marshall you're so funny man You should be a comedian, god damn!" Unfortunately I am I just hide behind the tears of a clown"

Meteloides said:
Stick to naturally occurring substances! Like Shrooms! And DMT! And Datura! And Amanita Phalloides! And Nutmeg! And Hemlock!
That'll expand the shit out of your DNA.
:ancientaliens:

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Re: Another friend died, too many funerals [Re: Evil Toadstool]
    #15524847 -

I hope not. I have another good friend through NA that was admitted to the hospital a few days ago because he had some heart trouble in the past and they were having a difficult time getting his medication straight to regulate his heart rate. I called him yesterday and he was doing well. He was being held for observation and I hope he gets out today for the funeral tonight. We were all very good friends.

And the funerals in the past, 2 were cancer, my aunt and my friends dad, 1 was my brothers best friend that died when he hit a deer on his ATV at 70mph (or rather the deer hit him), and the most recent one was another good friend of mine through NA who killed himself, but was sober at the time.

Man I'm going to miss him though, whenever I was feeling down we would talk and he would always put such a positive spin on the situation and just talking about our troubles made both of us feel like a huge weight was lifted off our shoulders.

He was one in a million, that's for sure. I'm just so glad I have the awesome memory of the last time I saw him and that he got his wish to die sober.

No idea what I'm going to say to his daughter though. She was in college out of state when it happened and I never met her. Apparently out of all the years of his drug addiction and destruction, they still loved each other very much. In fact on the obituary page there are 30 photos of him throughout his life and half of them were of him and his daughter as she grew up.


--------------------
Same thing happened to me when I played Neil Armstrong in Moonshot. They found me in an alley in Burbank trying to re-enter the earth's atmosphere in an old refrigerator box.

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Re: Another friend died, too many funerals [Re: WakeboardrB]
    #15524865 -

Rexter said:
What did he die of


WakeboardrB said:
4 days later he had a massive heart attack.



:facepalm:

That's terrible to hear, OP. Your friend was right, though. At least he did not let his former addiction get the best of him.

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Re: Another friend died, too many funerals [Re: Caine]
    #15524876 -

Sorry for your losses, OP.

Love to their family and friends.

Pardon the cliches, but we should always cherish life and never forget its fragility.


--------------------
Machine Age Maya

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Re: Another friend died, too many funerals [Re: Evil Toadstool]
    #15524885 -

Evil Toadstool said:
Sorry to hear that. I lost one of my best friends in August due to an accidental overdose and it really sucks, especially when he was only 27. Hopefully you don't have to attend another funeral for a while.


So sorry to hear. That really strikes a chord with me as I am 27 and I'm very surprised I had never overdosed in my 10 years of very active addiction. It reminds me of my own mortality. Hell, a few days before thanksgiving someone forced me off the road while I was driving home and I ran head first into a tree at 40-50mph, totaling my truck. I was lucky as hell, just had some scrapes and bruises from the seat belt and airbag and it aggravated my lower back injury I've been dealing with since I was 15.

If it wouldn't have been for the seat belt, I would have gone straight through the window and probably went face first into that fucking tree.


--------------------
Same thing happened to me when I played Neil Armstrong in Moonshot. They found me in an alley in Burbank trying to re-enter the earth's atmosphere in an old refrigerator box.

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Re: Another friend died, too many funerals [Re: Morphogenesis]
    #15524890 -

I knew some people that had heart attacks in there 30s or 40s that were former users. I had a doctor tell me it is common for people that use or have used coke or crack to have a heart attack 10 or 20 years earlier than they should have. It has something to do with the way it changes the heartbeat.

I think I'm in the same boat, with high BP and no job and no insurance.

Shit sucks. At least it was quick.

:peace: :love:


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Re: Another friend died, too many funerals [Re: Caine]
    #15524891 -

Caine said:
That's terrible to hear, OP. Your friend was right, though. At least he did not let his former addiction get the best of him.


Unfortunately I do believe his former addiction problems did play a part in his heart attack. I'm sure he did a lot of damage to his body over the years.

But that's the way it goes, I'm sure I did a lot of damage to my body over the years of drug and alcohol addiction. This is yet another reminder that I have to stay clean no matter what.

And thank you all for your sympathy, it really means a lot.


--------------------
Same thing happened to me when I played Neil Armstrong in Moonshot. They found me in an alley in Burbank trying to re-enter the earth's atmosphere in an old refrigerator box.

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Re: Another friend died, too many funerals [Re: WakeboardrB]
    #15525027 -

A good friend of mine died recently as well, it's a strange feeling. Sometimes I end up wanting to call him, or stop by his home but I know I'll get no answer.
Good vibes though man, I'm glad he does the way he wanted. Sober :smile:


--------------------
No sympathy for the devil, keep that in mind.
[url=
]Buy the ticket, take the ride. [/url]
Are you lost?

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Re: Another friend died, too many funerals [Re: Legend]
    #15525041 -

Yeah, he always took pride in his high drug tolerance for some reason. I wasn't with him the night it happened but over the last couple months he started snorting some kind of prescription drug. I'm not sure which one as I only smoke weed and eat shrooms and try stay away from that shit. Whenever he drank he would always have a 60oz of crown royal on him. Deadly mixture. He went to sleep on a Sunday and no one found him until Wednesday. He was too decomposed to find out what was in his system. I planned on having a "wake up call" talk with him the following weekend.

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Re: Another friend died, too many funerals [Re: WakeboardrB]
    #15525078 -

Sorry to hear of your losses

Always hard when a friend dies, as most of the time it comes unexpected and are the hardest to accept.

I had a friend die a month after he turned 21 in a car accident, him and his younger brother were both killed.  No known cause.  That was one of the toughest losses I have experienced as we were best friends since grade school.  It's been almost 10 years now, and I still think about him and all the good times that were had.

Stay strong.

:peace:

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Re: Another friend died, too many funerals [Re: MadSeasonAbove]
    #15525109 -

Sorry that this happened brother.

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Re: Another friend died, too many funerals [Re: Legend]
    #15525159 -

legit27 said:
A good friend of mine died recently as well, it's a strange feeling. Sometimes I end up wanting to call him, or stop by his home but I know I'll get no answer.
Good vibes though man, I'm glad he does the way he wanted. Sober :smile:


Yeah man, it's strange. The past few days whenever I picked up my cell phone I automatically went to his number since we used to talk almost every day this past month, sometimes 3-4 times in a day. It was so strange, thinking back... Wow, he's gone.

He was a very big part of my support group, someone who knew exactly what I was going through and someone I could share shit with that I wouldn't with anyone else.

Hell, just a few minutes ago I felt the need to call someone up just to shoot the shit and was like fuck... I can never call him again.

I don't even want to call his cell phone and listen to his voice mail message. I know I probably should, just to hear his voice again, but I don't know if I'm ready for that.


--------------------
Same thing happened to me when I played Neil Armstrong in Moonshot. They found me in an alley in Burbank trying to re-enter the earth's atmosphere in an old refrigerator box.

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Re: Another friend died, too many funerals [Re: MadSeasonAbove]
    #15525214 -

MadSeasonAbove said:
Sorry to hear of your losses

Always hard when a friend dies, as most of the time it comes unexpected and are the hardest to accept.




Yeah, I agree. When my aunt died from cancer, I had a little time to prepare. Not long though, which was probably a blessing. She died a little over 2 months after she was diagnosed. It hurt like hell that she died, but in a way I'm so glad it was so fast. She didn't linger in pain for years and have be subject to tons of radiation therapy and procedures. And it helped that my other aunt (her sister) is a nurse, well they both were, so she was able to take care of her sister in her final days instead of having hospice or her dying in a hospital like my grandma. In fact, we knew she was going and were there at the time of her death. She was in and out of consciousness for short periods of time right before she died and her sister actually helped her along with a massive shot of morphine, which we were all grateful for, even though it was illegal. She was on her way out and probably would have lingered for hours and hours or another day or two if it weren't for that. It was her time to go and her sister did a very courageous thing by speeding up the process.

Now my friends dad, it didn't go that way. He had pancreatic cancer and lived more than 2 years after he was diagnosed. He went through chemo and radiation multiple times and during the last few months he was in a great deal of pain. It was a shame to see him have to suffer like that.

Now with my friend who just died, apparently he was gone within 5 minutes. I don't know if it was painful or not, but he was dead before the paramedics got there. I really hope it wasn't painful, but at least it was quick.


--------------------
Same thing happened to me when I played Neil Armstrong in Moonshot. They found me in an alley in Burbank trying to re-enter the earth's atmosphere in an old refrigerator box.

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Re: Another friend died, too many funerals [Re: WakeboardrB]
    #15525251 -

WakeboardrB said:
A good friend of mine from Narcotics Anonymous died the other day and his funeral is today. It still hasn't really hit me, still feels really strange since I just had dinner and a great time with him last Saturday. I guess I'm thankful that my last memory of him was having a blast at a restaurant, swapping funny ass stories with one of his friends that I barely knew. And sober too.

We would talk pretty much every day, multiple times a day. Hell, I talked to him more than my sponsor. He was such an upbeat, positive person, even when talking about all the wreckage he was attempting to clean up in his life due to his years and years of drug abuse. We were talking in his car last week and we were talking about death for some reason. He had said if he died tomorrow, at least he would die clean and sober. And god dammit, he got his wish. 4 days later he had a massive heart attack.

But fuck, man this will be the 5th funeral I've been to, starting with my aunt's death in July of 09.

I gotta start figuring out what I'm going to wear.


This story makes me sad.

I'm glad he was able to defeat his addiction.


--------------------

BigUpRadio
WorldReggaeShow
DreaderThanDread - Listen!
(druqs said) don't get arsey, just get RC.

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Re: Another friend died, too many funerals [Re: Its Pat]
    #15525469 -

take a lession from this OP.



alway carry a special asprin for heart attacks


and

be comfortable with the way you are, because death is sneaky.



sorry for your loss of a friend


--------------------
EVERYTHING EVENTUALLY BECOMES A DESERT


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Re: Another friend died, too many funerals [Re: Its Pat]
    #15525878 -

Its Pat said:
This story makes me sad.

I'm glad he was able to defeat his addiction.


He had been in and out of NA since like 1989. I think his longest stretch of sobriety was 6-7 years. This time he came back around the same time I came back and just celebrated his 9 month anniversary a few weeks ago.

So who's to say if he would have relapsed again or not, but he did have more than 9 months clean when he died.

It's funny, a few weeks ago we were driving out to a guys house to look at a truck that was for sale that he needed for his new business, which required towing a trailer. We got to talking and he said his greatest wish would be to die sober.

He got his wish.


--------------------
Same thing happened to me when I played Neil Armstrong in Moonshot. They found me in an alley in Burbank trying to re-enter the earth's atmosphere in an old refrigerator box.

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Re: Another friend died, too many funerals [Re: WakeboardrB]
    #15528034 -

Man I hate open casket viewings. He didn't look anything like himself, except for his hair.

Same thing with my aunt. I don't understand it, if they're going to make a person look like a fucking mannequin, what's the point of even having an open casket. It just upsets people.

Other than that the service went pretty well. The priest got lost and was 20 minutes late, so they asked people to come up and share stories and talk about what a great person he was. Everyone that talked I knew and I found out a lot more about how much of a great guy he was.

I'm going to miss him and I have a feeling every time I go to a NA meeting, I'll be expecting to see him there, joking and laughing with me and all of his friends. Definitely a weird feeling.


--------------------
Same thing happened to me when I played Neil Armstrong in Moonshot. They found me in an alley in Burbank trying to re-enter the earth's atmosphere in an old refrigerator box.

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Re: Another friend died, too many funerals [Re: WakeboardrB] * 2
    #15528046 -

being in 12 step groups was really conducive to knowing people that die, in my experience.

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