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Fleeting (new) daddy fears.
    #15345060 -

I'm having fleeting new daddy fears.

My little one is cooking in the oven ( My girls belly )

And I'm starting to get a little...

"DUDE... RUN!!!"

I love my girl, and I'm VERY excited that I'm going to be a daddy, to that little bundle of poop, and screaming.

But I have all those "Old desires" lingering in my mind.

Like..

*Get a van
*Tour the country
*Live on the cheap

*Go off Meds

*Party, drugs, music.

etc.

But now I'm like..

*Stay home hubby.
*Bill payer
*Mr. Mom
*Stay on Meds
*Refrain from dro0Gz

etc.

But yeah man..

They are just fleeting.

Rational fears I believe.


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IT'S A FISHY!!!!! ----> :fishy:

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Re: Fleeting (new) daddy fears. [Re: Bundy]
    #15345073 -

Being a father is a scary thing.
You are now the role model for a developing human being.
Don't take it lightly.

EDIT: BTW, dads can still take drugs if done responsibly.


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Re: Fleeting (new) daddy fears. [Re: Bundy]
    #15345081 -

I know that feel.  I get this dreadful, sinking feeling if I ever accidentally end up on the baby aisle at the store.  It's like a preview of what's to come if I ever do have children.

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Re: Fleeting (new) daddy fears. [Re: Bundy]
    #15345083 -

You've made ya bed, now you must lie in it :tongue:

Enjoy the 20 years of slave labor paying for the child.  :lol:


Sorry maybe I should be sympathetic but if your gonna make babies and have sex without protection then you have to be prepared for what we know is coming and thats 20 years of being a good role model, loving father and working everyday to pay the bills for that kid.  You shouldn't of fucked her if you were unsure about that.

My dad bailed on me and i turned out a right prick so dont bail on your kid.

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Re: Fleeting (new) daddy fears. [Re: nice1]
    #15345167 -

I agree with everyone so far. Just because you're having a kid doesn't mean you can't do the things you want. You just do them responsibly. I'm 24 years old with a 3 year old son. I've been 'Mr.Mom' for the last 3 years. I didn't plan on having a kid but it happened and it happened at horrible time but you do what you have to. And it's very worth it, I must say. I have a dead beat dad too and if anything it makes me be that much more on point for my son.

It's incredibly hard, make no mistake. The only time I have to myself is about once a month, I wake up at 4am and eat a few doses and have nice trip before he wakes up. A big allure of tripping these days is just trying to better myself for him.

Your feelings are entirely understandable. Being scared is one thing, I still am, just make sure you DO the right thing.


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I am the storm. I am the wonder.

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Re: Fleeting (new) daddy fears. [Re: nice1]
    #15345181 -

nice1 said:
You've made ya bed, now you must lie in it :tongue:

Enjoy the 20 years of slave labor paying for the child.  :lol:


Sorry maybe I should be sympathetic but if your gonna make babies and have sex without protection then you have to be prepared for what we know is coming and thats 20 years of being a good role model, loving father and working everyday to pay the bills for that kid.  You shouldn't of fucked her if you were unsure about that.

My dad bailed on me and i turned out a right prick so dont bail on your kid.



My (real) dad bailed on me too. So I wouldn't dream of fucking my kid over like that. It's just feelings. Feelings of wanting that life, that either way, kid or not, I wouldn't have gone through with. I just have the "What if's" floating around.

"A mother becomes a mother when she becomes pregnant, a father becomes a father, when the baby is born"

I knew what I was doing, we both did. We have money, a place, etc. I just have those little fears, and wants, and what ifs.

But honestly though, They are pretty easy to let go.

Everyone around me has been saying that I have this happiness to me now, that I didn't have before.

Even my girl has been picking on me pretty hard. I went out, got a bunch of baby books, have been reading them pretty much non-stop ( taking breaks here and there for the Shroomery, and errands )

I got a scrap book, and I even started writing a journal for my baby.

"Letters to my Baby"

So I've been writing these little letters "Dear Baby" telling my unborn child what's going on, how the family is, what I'm like, what her mommy is like. I figured I'd keep it up until she was 16 or so, and give it to him/her. Or maybe a college present.

Fleeting fears I'm sure are pretty common. They'll pass.

I just wanted to post, cause I love my shroomery family, and value all your guys' feedback.


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IT'S A FISHY!!!!! ----> :fishy:

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Re: Fleeting (new) daddy fears. [Re: Bundy] * 1
    #15345198 -

Bundy said:
I'm having fleeting new daddy fears.

My little one is cooking in the oven ( My girls belly )

And I'm starting to get a little...

"DUDE... RUN!!!"

I love my girl, and I'm VERY excited that I'm going to be a daddy, to that little bundle of poop, and screaming.

But I have all those "Old desires" lingering in my mind.

Like..

*Get a van
*Tour the country
*Live on the cheap

*Go off Meds

*Party, drugs, music.

etc.

But now I'm like..

*Stay home hubby.
*Bill payer
*Mr. Mom
*Stay on Meds
*Refrain from dro0Gz

etc.

But yeah man..

They are just fleeting.

Rational fears I believe.


You're life is going to change.  Your life is going to change no matter what you do.  These changes are now thrust upon you.  Happened to me 21 years ago.  Now you must be a man.  You must put away childish things and accept your responsibilities.  They are great but not overwhelming.  You must embrace the challenge.  You cannot wallow in what could have or should have been.  You only have what is. 

Nothing wrong with being intimidated by the awesome responsibility.  You can win this.  Good luck to all three of you.


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Re: Fleeting (new) daddy fears. [Re: Bundy]
    #15345207 -

I hear ya

Congratulations man, all the best to ya  :cheers:

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Re: Fleeting (new) daddy fears. [Re: Bundy]
    #15345218 -

BTW, just being there and being involved in the child's life makes you better than half the fathers out there.
Also, time out is your friend. And their enemy. :smile:


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Re: Fleeting (new) daddy fears. [Re: Bundy]
    #15345230 -

Itll be ok man, once you get the hang of it, fatherhood is awesome. Im molding this little dude. Teaching him new things. Also, now i have a REASON to want work hard. I think the hardest part is losing the selfishness in favor of sacrifice. My wife and I are actually planning, yes planning our next child, the fun part is getting to shoot your loads intentionally. Ride that shit till you pass out.

Take a deep breath and brace yourself for crazyness. My son is the reason I addapted to sleeping 5-6 hours a night. Weekends are Daddy time, i sleep till 9.

Learn all you can about babies. How to reduce fevers and such. It can get scary the first time they get really sick.
Make sure to give your girl plenty of attention and encouragement. Its a hard time for the ladies before and after. How you treat her during pregnancy will affect you relationship after the birth. Lotta dudes tune out and the girls freak out.

Any how thats my advice.


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"With me the horrid doubt always arises whether the convictions of man’s mind, which has been developed from the mind of the lower animals, are of any value or at all trustworthy. Would any one trust in the convictions of a monkey’s mind, if there are any convictions in such a mind." Charles Darwin

"DNA neither knows nor cares. DNA just is, and we dance to its music." Richard Dawkins


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Re: Fleeting (new) daddy fears. [Re: Circle Jerk]
    #15345297 -

OP I just had a baby girl 4 months ago (I am 25) and she is the joy of my life. It was intimidating to think about before she was born, but when you actually meet your child and hold her/him in your arms they will have your heart from that day on. It's going to be hard man but anything thats worth doing is hard right? Some advice give that kid the best life you possibly can (I don't mean with material things).

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Re: Fleeting (new) daddy fears. [Re: The Influence]
    #15345673 -

The Influence said:
OP I just had a baby girl 4 months ago (I am 25) and she is the joy of my life. It was intimidating to think about before she was born, but when you actually meet your child and hold her/him in your arms they will have your heart from that day on. It's going to be hard man but anything thats worth doing is hard right? Some advice give that kid the best life you possibly can (I don't mean with material things).


:like:


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IT'S A FISHY!!!!! ----> :fishy:

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Re: Fleeting (new) daddy fears. [Re: Bundy]
    #15345697 -

Bundy said:
I'm having fleeting new daddy fears.

My little one is cooking in the oven ( My girls belly )

And I'm starting to get a little...

"DUDE... RUN!!!"

I love my girl, and I'm VERY excited that I'm going to be a daddy, to that little bundle of poop, and screaming.

But I have all those "Old desires" lingering in my mind.

Like..

*Get a van
*Tour the country
*Live on the cheap

*Go off Meds

*Party, drugs, music.

etc.

But now I'm like..

*Stay home hubby.
*Bill payer
*Mr. Mom
*Stay on Meds
*Refrain from dro0Gz

etc.

But yeah man..

They are just fleeting.

Rational fears I believe.


I love how people use the word "meds" to make it seem like they dont mean drugs.


anyway, that run dude run feeling is natural.

i think the whole Marry, settle down, reproduce way of thinking is pushed on us and doesnt come naturally to men. The reproduce instinct is pretty strong and so is the get the fuck out of there instinct. YOu already listened to one now listen to the other n GTFO.

Your subconsious knows best. ALWAYS. only when we refuse to trust our intuition do we bring suffering into our lives.

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Re: Fleeting (new) daddy fears. [Re: Apostle]
    #15345718 -

When I say Meds, I literally mean meds.

My Anti-pyschotic medication.

I can't really raise a baby if I'm hallucinating.

But I did mention Drugs up there too.


--------------------
IT'S A FISHY!!!!! ----> :fishy:

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Re: Fleeting (new) daddy fears. [Re: Bundy]
    #15345769 -

Lots of anti-psych meds cause psychotic like symptoms and IMO are probably the cause of the problems they supposedly  treat.  Every person i have seen put on stuff like haldol was pretty normal before treament(aside from the anxieties and "depression" that affects us all).

Thinking these anxieties n fears arent normal leaves people willing to label themselves as "crazy" in order to be fed pills they hope will make them "happy".
Problem is these pills alter your personality greatly and leave you worse off than you were before.

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Re: Fleeting (new) daddy fears. [Re: Bundy]
    #15345782 -

set up the baby's room with mad blacklights and lava lamps n trippy as fuck blacklight posters n crazy ass huge stuffed animals n little trees in there, n incense burning n a humidifier n stuff.  n play fucking crazy music in there all the time (like experimental music n acid jazz n stuff).  n put pictures of naked elves n dragons n shit all over.  n hang trippy blankets from the ceiling.  n write chinese all over the walls.

basically set up a trip pad, n raise ur kid in that cradle of fung.  n meditate n project images of spiky green emo hair'd elf chicks having blissful sex n shit.

n when the kid is old enuf start fightin' it with karate n manhandling it so they r not super sensitive n afraid to be touched.  n have sum cats or something.  n feed the kid whey protein shakes n spicy fish stew so they'll grow up with sexy fat legs.  n if it's a girl put that kid in shorty shorts as soon as u can.  n if u wanna...  blow that shit up man.  show that kid love.

raise an acid elf that dun even need the chems.  please.


--------------------
uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhmmmm... ... ...


ok.

Edited by stimpson (11/09/11 05:16 PM)

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Re: Fleeting (new) daddy fears. [Re: Apostle]
    #15345900 -

Hologram said:
Lots of anti-psych meds cause psychotic like symptoms and IMO are probably the cause of the problems they supposedly  treat.  Every person i have seen put on stuff like haldol was pretty normal before treament(aside from the anxieties and "depression" that affects us all).

Thinking these anxieties n fears arent normal leaves people willing to label themselves as "crazy" in order to be fed pills they hope will make them "happy".
Problem is these pills alter your personality greatly and leave you worse off than you were before.


I'm on the Anti-psychotics for hallucinations, and they do help. While I agree with what you said with MOST cases, it isn't the case for me.

They level me A LOT. Off meds I'm a baskett case. Blocking off doors and windows and shit, taking a 10 minute drive and turning it into a 40 minute drive cause I think someone is fallowing me etc.

If I'm gonna have a kid, I can't be doing that stuff.

Once my kid is old enough, and I can explain whats going on in my head, then I'll attempt ( again ) to go off meds. But for now.. Meds it is.


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IT'S A FISHY!!!!! ----> :fishy:

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Re: Fleeting (new) daddy fears. [Re: Bundy]
    #15345937 -

hey man i used opiates my whole life for silencing my mind so i'm not judging you. Most of us are under the grips of one chemical or another :shrug:


Best of luck.

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Re: Fleeting (new) daddy fears. [Re: Apostle]
    #15345976 -

the fear will pass dude and will soon be replaced with a joy you cannot get anywhere else. :thumbup:
also
he's your replacement man. train him well


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wake the phantoms and invite them to dance

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Re: Fleeting (new) daddy fears. [Re: Apostle]
    #15345988 -

From your posts it's clear that you haven't had schizophrenia or a child though.


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