Home | Community | Message Board

MushroomMan Mycology
This site includes paid links. Please support our sponsors.


Welcome to the Shroomery Message Board! You are experiencing a small sample of what the site has to offer. Please login or register to post messages and view our exclusive members-only content. You'll gain access to additional forums, file attachments, board customizations, encrypted private messages, and much more!

Shop: PhytoExtractum Maeng Da Thai Kratom Leaf Powder   Bridgetown Botanicals Bridgetown Botanicals   Kraken Kratom Red Vein Kratom

Jump to first unread post Pages: 1
OfflineNastyDHL
Male User Gallery


Registered: 04/04/08
Posts: 3,586
Loc: New England
Last seen: 1 year, 30 days
Words, confronting denials, acceptance, honesty and communication. (somewhat 'long')
    #9074292 - 10/14/08 12:29 AM (15 years, 4 months ago)

The other night a "friend", Kristen got drunk (as usual) and stayed the night at the same house as me.  In the morning she said something like, "Damn what time is it? 11?  I was supposed to give Alyssa a ride to work this morning at 10:30 so good thing she got a ride home from her brother last night."

I said, "Good thing your roommate recognizes that you are unreliable)

She got pissed.

I talked about this with another friend, Brian, who I had just spent 2 hours with talking online about the situation he put himself in where his best friend betrayed his trust by trying to get with the girl Brian liked. 

I tried to get Brian to confront his denials, his rationalizations and his desires that were formed out of fantasy and unrealistic hopes, he got pissed at first and after I forced him to admit to me that the matter obviously still bothered him, he came to terms with himself and admitted that it still bothered him.  After some badgering and some more denying and avoiding on his part, he finally admitted that it bothered him but he denied that it bothered to him earlier because he felt immature and he didn't want it to bother him. 

After that acceptance, I talked to him for a while giving him a different perspective on his situation and contributing additional insights.  He responded to the different ideas and questions I stated very receptively.  He admitted that in all honest he would like if someone talked shit about his former best friend.  He came to terms with alot of problems that his ego created for him but he still believed that these two were the ones primarily at fault (you may assume this too, but you don't know the complete context of the situation, so trust the stated opinion(s) please).

I told him the Kristen story and he said he thought I was pushing her buttons.  I asked if "pushing one's buttons" was not just a euphemism for confronting one's denials out loud.  He agreed but thought that the words and tone are what pissed her off, not the message.  I agreed but said that the message could have been entirely the same, but had I used more compassionate words than I would have soothed her ego into a more accepting and honest state.  After I told him, "selfishness is cultivated by denials
beasue denial is just a reflection of what you want and what you dont want
and expectating others to live up to your denials is a terrible thing", he had a realization that I evoked because I caused him to relate his situation to Kristen's, those three quoted lines above, and because I helped shape his ego into a more receptive and honestly accepting state.

I thought about the possibility that messages come from within the mind, but we send them through symbols known to us as words.  We all have different interpretations and associations with these symbols but the message is without interpretation, the interpretation is created through the use of words.  We can use certain words to more accurately and honestly reflect and communicate our message, or we can also use words egotistically; inhibiting our honesty, genuineness, and effectiveness of the message.

The listening mind receives the message and depending on its forcefulness (determined by word choice) can either accept, disagree, or egotistically deny the message.  If I had said the message in a 'nicer' way, Kristen would've realized that she should treat her roommate better and that she was undependable and selfish.  However, given the way I delivered my message, Kristen avoided the information concerning her roommate and only paid attention to the attitude and it's sender, that she perceived.

By using more compassionate words I can sooth her ego into a more accepting and receptive state.  Her ego possibly lets its guard down once it realizes it is no longer being threatened.  Associations with word choice and tone may threaten the ego and its self imposed beliefs, or it may bypass this filter possibly meant to protect humans from being exposed as socially inferior or to protect the ego's way of life it has created.  Perhaps the ego has evolved to protect its creations.

Anyway, the idea that this message (a pure thought, devoid of interpretation through symbols/words) is transferrable through means other than the 5 senses does not seem unlikely to me.  The ego could protect itself by blocking out telepathic communication, but ego's could directly send messages to other ego's, which the messages could then be interpreted back to signals.  The purpose for blocking out telepathic communication could be to let the ego's evolution and development continue, so the ego could adapt to its own environment and create other filters or defensive mechanisms that it needs to be more successful.  Once the ego evolves to the point where it no longer needs to evolve further, or gets to the point where it realizes it no longer needs to evolve further, then telepathic communication may be accessible.

Messages are within naturally, words are developed and learned as ways to deliver messages through the only means we know how.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineCepheus
Balance
Male User Gallery


Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 04/19/06
Posts: 8,266
Loc: the space between reality...
Last seen: 1 year, 1 month
Re: Words, confronting denials, acceptance, honesty and communication. (somewhat 'long') [Re: NastyDHL]
    #9074413 - 10/14/08 01:24 AM (15 years, 4 months ago)

Man, that was full of platitudes and difficult to follow.

While we're on the topic of ego's, this seems, to me, to be an ego stroking thread.


--------------------
"I only ever hope to reach equilibrium, in Nature's matrix, in line with the meridian" ~ Jehst

:sun: "...and I know that I have to keep breathing, as tomorrow the sun will rise, who knows what the tide will bring?" :sun:

Free Spore Ring Europe
Send any spare spore prints you might have and help the distribution :grin:

Open Source. Freedom.  GNU/Linux

Addicting is not a word.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleWhiskeyClone
Not here
Male User Gallery

Registered: 06/25/01
Posts: 16,509
Loc: Longitudinal Center of Canada ...
Re: Words, confronting denials, acceptance, honesty and communication. (somewhat 'long') [Re: NastyDHL]
    #9075673 - 10/14/08 11:43 AM (15 years, 4 months ago)

This thread has been closed.

Reason:
You posted this in P&S already


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Jump to top Pages: 1

Shop: PhytoExtractum Maeng Da Thai Kratom Leaf Powder   Bridgetown Botanicals Bridgetown Botanicals   Kraken Kratom Red Vein Kratom


Similar ThreadsPosterViewsRepliesLast post
* if honesty isn't the best policy, what is? Smack31 2,054 17 10/22/02 06:47 AM
by Bruiser
* Hippie commune.....not in Holland LearyfanS 2,003 9 05/19/04 06:41 AM
by Krishna
* Acceptable greiving period after breakup?
( 1 2 all )
xmercury 2,300 31 09/18/04 12:08 AM
by Bully
* honesty..............it's still here scotsman1 604 9 07/17/04 01:02 PM
by ToTheSummit
* I have decided to leave the community.
( 1 2 3 4 all )
Anonymous 5,003 78 12/09/04 04:23 PM
by Jim
* why is it so hard for people to accept drug use?
( 1 2 all )
lilbilski4life 4,005 26 07/15/05 10:15 PM
by Stoned_Druid
* my goddamned community college ZippoZM 938 14 05/03/05 01:13 PM
by tomk
* Are there any real communities out there? Adamist 1,699 18 07/10/03 08:17 PM
by Baby_Hitler

Extra information
You cannot start new topics / You cannot reply to topics
HTML is disabled / BBCode is enabled
Moderator: Entire Staff
577 topic views. 4 members, 45 guests and 39 web crawlers are browsing this forum.
[ Show Images Only | Sort by Score | Print Topic ]
Search this thread:

Copyright 1997-2024 Mind Media. Some rights reserved.

Generated in 0.023 seconds spending 0.008 seconds on 14 queries.