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Mushrooms, Mycology and Psychedelics > Mushroom Cultivation
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Funny Questions
    #883021 -

Questions that make the Raccoon break out in laughter.

Questions like this PROVE -- those who asked -- did not read the FAQ.

Or, are brain dead -- to start out with.

Mod, move or delete as you think best.

1. How many pints fit in a pressure cooker that holds 4 quart jars

2. Is the mycelium supposed to be green, blue or grey?

3. Can you use styrofoam cups in a microwave or PC?

4. Is $90 a good price for a P. C. spore syringe?

5. Will dog shit work as a substrate?

6. How long do you have to dry a mushroom in the oven @ 400 F.

7. The jars smell like rotten eggs. Is everything Okay?

8. Does cobweb mold look like cobwebs?

9. Who is this Stamets guy?

10. Can I use Tee shirt cloth as a jar filter?

11. I want to grow 100 pounds - quick.  What's the best Tek?

12. I live in Ca. What vendor will ship me spores?

Okay, that's enough. But, there are a zillioin more.

6T  :tongue: 


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~whiskey river rafting, hot tubbing, dirty dancing & spending money on - wild women - having fun & just gonna waste the rest~

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Re: Funny Questions [Re: SixTango]
    #883028 -

Okay, I got a spore syringe from a vendor, do I inject it in my arm or my ass? :grin:


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I'm just a field researcher for Hitchhikers Guide to The Galaxy.

My entry so far.... "shrooms: Mostly harmless"

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Re: Funny Questions [Re: SixTango]
    #883029 -

zillions and zillions.

Thanks for the laugh!

pc

K


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^Pure Fiction^
The only true currency in this bankrupt world is what you share with someone else when you're uncool.

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Re: Funny Questions [Re: SixTango]
    #883050 -

Not to steal your thunder, but....

13. I innoculated my jars yesterday, and I want to trip next week, do you think this is possible.

14. My cakes have fuzzy white mold, is this alright.

15. How much yeild should I expect from a cake.


Hmmm, sounds like some reading is in store.


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Re-Defeat Bush in '04

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Re: Funny Questions [Re: SixTango]
    #883055 -

My favorite was ...........
What is an ounce ?
They should ask .............
How did I get this far with no common sense ?
But we all have brain farts and lost synapses , causing us to ask "FUNNY QUESTIONS"
I am sure I have and will ask questions in the future whos answer is plain as the nose on my face ...............ahchooo! :crazy:

May the mushroom godess bless all you're endeavors ! 


--------------------
Any information I give is not intended to aide you in the production of potentialy illegal substances !None of my exp comes from growing illegal varities , so take it as you will .
So with that said here is our mission statement .

Then the priest fell into a trance or swoon,& said unto the Queen of heaven ; Write unto us the ordeals; write unto us the rituals; write unto us the law !

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Re: Funny Questions [Re: Skikid16]
    #883063 -

"Raining on you're parade "
13 NO
14 Sure its not a contam ?
15 As much as a "properly" made cake can ......1-3 flushes !


--------------------
Any information I give is not intended to aide you in the production of potentialy illegal substances !None of my exp comes from growing illegal varities , so take it as you will .
So with that said here is our mission statement .

Then the priest fell into a trance or swoon,& said unto the Queen of heaven ; Write unto us the ordeals; write unto us the rituals; write unto us the law !

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Re: Funny Questions [Re: tripndicular]
    #883075 -

My post was a joke, and I hope for my sake, trip's was as well.

A couple more.
16. My cake is fruiting, but it also has green mold, are these safe to eat.

But in all seriousness, the validity of a question depends on the person that tries to answer it, If I posted in advanced forum, I'm sure I would be flammed to hell or moved to good ol regular Mush Cult. Newbies can ask some dumb questions, But its simple, Send em to the FAQ.


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Re-Defeat Bush in '04

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Re: Funny Questions [Re: Skikid16]
    #883090 -

I hope I did not sound as if I did not  get the joke ? I my self am new to growing my own . I have known people who did ,learned a bit there , also like gardening , some priciples apply the same , and read my ass off in cultivators book , this forumn , and erowid . I also did not mean to sound insultive to those who are mentally challenged .
But when the shoe fits...............
It looks "FUNNY" from my point of view . :cool: :wink: 


--------------------
Any information I give is not intended to aide you in the production of potentialy illegal substances !None of my exp comes from growing illegal varities , so take it as you will .
So with that said here is our mission statement .

Then the priest fell into a trance or swoon,& said unto the Queen of heaven ; Write unto us the ordeals; write unto us the rituals; write unto us the law !

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Re: Funny Questions [Re: Skikid16]
    #883094 -

Can't leave out the all important:

17. My cakes have been in the "terraNium" for a week, when will I see pins?

18. How long till my pins grow into mature shrooms?

19. Some of my pins' caps turned black and they stopped growing. What's wrong?

Yup, there are zilliions, all right! :smile:

Thanks 6T, I needed a laugh. 


--------------------
================================================



"Have some congratulatory drugs." - C. Montgomery Burns

I'll probably always do drugs, so that just contributes to the addiction to The Shroomery... It's a vicious circle of bliss. :tongue2:

TM™ :cool:

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Re: Funny Questions [Re: Skikid16]
    #883101 -

16 Only if you have an incurable disease !

I am different than many .......I believe the only "dumb" question is the unasked one !
Not knowing is a disability that makes lawyers richer . :smirk: 


--------------------
Any information I give is not intended to aide you in the production of potentialy illegal substances !None of my exp comes from growing illegal varities , so take it as you will .
So with that said here is our mission statement .

Then the priest fell into a trance or swoon,& said unto the Queen of heaven ; Write unto us the ordeals; write unto us the rituals; write unto us the law !

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Re: Funny Questions [Re: TM]
    #883103 -

20 I thought mushrooms only grew in the dark ?


--------------------
Any information I give is not intended to aide you in the production of potentialy illegal substances !None of my exp comes from growing illegal varities , so take it as you will .
So with that said here is our mission statement .

Then the priest fell into a trance or swoon,& said unto the Queen of heaven ; Write unto us the ordeals; write unto us the rituals; write unto us the law !

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Re: Funny Questions [Re: tripndicular]
    #883106 -

I'm sorry but one of the best that I have heard is

If I innoculate my cakes with two different strains, can I make a hybrid

Which I know is possible, In theory, but so highly unlikely that you'd probably have to innoculate thousands of jars to get the desired result.


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Re-Defeat Bush in '04

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Re: Funny Questions [Re: SixTango]
    #883112 -

Post deleted by administrator.

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Re: Funny Questions [Re: Skikid16]
    #883113 -

How bout

21. Can I use my own shit as spawn.

Or the winner for the absolute lazy man award

22. I'm new to growing, where do I start.


--------------------
Re-Defeat Bush in '04

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Re: Funny Questions [Re: Skikid16]
    #883117 -

That breeding shit is kinda cool , but I have not read much on it yet . Do not know if I care to know .
Was that another "funny" or was that serious ?
If serious ....... cross breeding hybrids is best done on agar .........IS IT NOT ?
Hope I am not exposing my ignorance ?


--------------------
Any information I give is not intended to aide you in the production of potentialy illegal substances !None of my exp comes from growing illegal varities , so take it as you will .
So with that said here is our mission statement .

Then the priest fell into a trance or swoon,& said unto the Queen of heaven ; Write unto us the ordeals; write unto us the rituals; write unto us the law !

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Re: Funny Questions [Re: Skikid16]
    #883122 -

I have been reading this whole post , and I could have some real "evil" fun answering them all ! Even my own ! Gotta love it , makes you feel kinda special .
Life is best when you laugh at it ! :laugh: 


--------------------
Any information I give is not intended to aide you in the production of potentialy illegal substances !None of my exp comes from growing illegal varities , so take it as you will .
So with that said here is our mission statement .

Then the priest fell into a trance or swoon,& said unto the Queen of heaven ; Write unto us the ordeals; write unto us the rituals; write unto us the law !

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Re: Funny Questions [Re: tripndicular]
    #883124 -

that breeding shit is really cool, but from what I've read, really hard. Teonen had an amazing post on this subject, sorry but i'm too lazy to use the search engine to find a link, but if you were so inclined, go ahead.


--------------------
Re-Defeat Bush in '04

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Re: Funny Questions [Re: SixTango]
    #883250 -

Great post Six!
Thanks for the laugh!

I might as well add this to the thread!

If David Letterman made up a top 10 on this.

and the #1 most asked question :

*drum roll*


#1. Where can I buy Verm?

#2. Where can I get BRF?

#3. Where can I get 1/2 pint jars?

#4. What temps do I need?

#5. How much humidity do I need?

#6. Anything dealing with perilite!!!!!!

#7. How do I dry my mushrooms? Do food dehydrators work? etc. etc.

#8. How can I grow 100 oz's fast. ?

#9. How many mushrooms should I take to trip?

#10. Anno please respond. << poor Anno

:grin:

   


--------------------
Laterz, Road

Who the hell you callin crazy?
You wouldn't know what crazy was if Charles Manson was eating froot loops on your front porch!

Brainiac said:
PM the names with on there names, that means they have mushrooms for sale.


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Re: Funny Questions [Re: Roadkill]
    #883254 -

I?d say that is a pretty accurate list of the most frequently asked questions?the top three definitely seem to be outpacing most other stupid questions from what I?ve seen lately. I think #9 should be a little higher, unless we are limiting this to the Cultivation forum.  :smile:   

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Mushrooms, Mycology and Psychedelics > Mushroom Cultivation
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