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Sex with your backyard furniture
    #8219699 -

link


Quote:
(BELLEVUE, OH) -- Police say a man in Bellevue, Ohio was caught on tape having sex with a picnic table.

Bellevue Police Captain Matt Johnson says Art Price, Jr., 40, was seen on four occasions between the hours of 10:30 a.m. and noon having sex with his picnic table. What makes this a felony, Johnson says, is that it took place in close proximity to a school, which made it likely that children could have seen Price.

The neighbor -- who wishes to remain anonymous -- saw Price walk out onto his deck, stand a round metal table on its side and use the hole in the umbrella to have sex.

The most recent instance took place March 14, we're told. A neighbor videotaped Price.

"The first video we had, he was completely nude. He would use the hole from the umbrella and have sex with the table," Johnson says.

Police say Price admitted to the crimes -- four charges of public indecency. Usually these sorts of things are misdemeanors, but in this case, they are felonies.

"What boosts it up to a felony is that the statute says if it's likely to be viewed by a minor," Johnson explains.

The Price family did not want to talk with us, but neighbors did. Some are not happy Price was released on his own recognizance.

"He shouldn't be allowed just for the fact that he could do that again -- and nude that close to a school. That should be zero tolerance," says Brice Jacobs, a neighbor.

Price is married with three school-aged children. Neighbors tell us they're now worried about the kids.

"Hopefully it stays between the adults and the kids don't get a lot of the information so they aren't so cruel to the little kids," says Emily Grote, a neighbor.

This case has police in this small town shaking their heads. "Once you think you've seen it all, something else comes around," Johnson says.

Report: WTOL, Toledo




I love the non intellectual response about being nude where children may see. LOL, i wouldnt stik up for this guy, but how hillarious is this that he gets this rap based on the fact that "the children" might be harmed, sound formiliar? Now its illegal to potentialy comit a crime? example: getting busted with a large personal supply of pot just over the dealing threashold and being tried for selling to children because you live near a school.

hey assholes: the guy was fucking his picknik table, you dont need to say anything else.

i bet he's a shroomery member...


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Re: Sex with your backyard furniture [Re: rodfarva]
    #8219779 -

Yup. Ya can't be nude anymore. Humans can't be nude.

:cop:

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Re: Sex with your backyard furniture [Re: rodfarva]
    #8219797 -

Tangerines?!

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Re: Sex with your backyard furniture [Re: Atheist]
    #8219806 -

he did this at his house on his powch? fuckin cops and idiots

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Re: Sex with your backyard furniture [Re: milkman]
    #8219813 -

why didnt he just use a paper towel roll?:foreheadslap:


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I need Jesus.

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Re: Sex with your backyard furniture [Re: Atheist]
    #8219817 -

Atheist said:
Tangerines?!


i didnt want to say anything, but tangerines does live in ohio and went missing from the shroomery for about the time it takes to get araigned by video and returned to your backyard.

i wounder if the cops kept the table as evidnce.. they should sieze the house because it was involved in a child pornography case.


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Re: Sex with your backyard furniture [Re: thoughts]
    #8219819 -

he shouldv bought a Fleshlight

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Re: Sex with your backyard furniture [Re: Atheist]
    #8219842 -

Atheist said:
he shouldv bought a Fleshlight


and put it in the hole of the table then brought it inside, cause obviously the funiture turns him on and not the pussy ha

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Re: Sex with your backyard furniture [Re: milkman]
    #8219861 -

my microwave is looking pretty sexy right about now
its giving me bedroom eyes


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blankk said to fee:
btw you're a total fucking psychedelic pimp
Turtletotem said:
I want to become a sun worshipper, so next time an atheist smugly asks me where god is, I can point smugly at the sun and laugh my ass off.

Then I drive away in my solar powered piece of shit car, cool stuff man.

And then I go kill a bitch because the flaming orb in the sky told me to do so, and I don't know, oppress a few minorities here and there in the name of nuclear fusion?

Religion is fun.

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Re: Sex with your backyard furniture [Re: fee]
    #8219933 -

he was later quoted "that table wanted it..."


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Re: Sex with your backyard furniture [Re: rodfarva]
    #8219981 -

Quote:
The most recent instance took place March 14, we're told. A neighbor videotaped Price.


:popcorn:


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"You should view the world as a conspiracy run by a very closely-knit group of nearly omnipotent people, and you should think of that group as yourself and your friends."

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Re: Sex with your backyard furniture [Re: rodfarva]
    #8220470 -

rodfarva said:
he was later quoted "that table wanted it..."


lololol :cool:

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Re: Sex with your backyard furniture [Re: rodfarva]
    #8220548 -

He probably knew his neighbor was looking and wanted to show her what he was made of.

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