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losing my mind
    #6069270 -

After years of use and abuse of many substances it's finally occurring. My sense of reality is shattering and I can't see anything but the transparent reflection on the falling shards. Complex delusions, blackouts. I was even hospitalized after a 5 hour long rampage I don't remember. I'm not depressed at all, but when I have my episodes suicide is often a valid thought just to end the fucking game. Don't fuck with drugs and think you're immortal, I've crossed the threshhold and I'm hoping I come back.


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Re: losing my mind [Re: rommstein2001]
    #6069285 -

What drugs have you been using and abusing over the years?


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All I know is that I dont know.

Row, row, row, you boat, gently down the stream.
Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, life is but a dream.

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Re: losing my mind [Re: badreligion2good]
    #6069296 -

heroin cocaine meth< pills. the meth pushed me over. But I've had similar episodes after big trips. Keep in mind that as far as tripping goes im very responsible, I don't trip for fun, although I do enjoy it.


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Re: losing my mind [Re: rommstein2001]
    #6069331 -

Yeah man, thats some dumb shit to be using and abusing. I wish you the best. You can stop whenever you want though, if you really want to you can do it! YOU CAN DO IT! I personally avoid synthetics that people use for recreational purposes, they're usually addictive, and take a toll on your body. Cocaine, is the exception of the rule, but only because its not a synthetic, I dont fuck with that shit either. If I ever want to try coca, Im gonna stick to the leaves.


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All I know is that I dont know.

Row, row, row, you boat, gently down the stream.
Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, life is but a dream.

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Re: losing my mind [Re: rommstein2001]
    #6069344 -

I think youll be fine.lay off the drugs have a balanced diet exercise and youll notice a huge diference even drinking coffee can fuck with you.About a year ago after experimenting with shrooms a couple times i would get shroom feelings when i was sober.especially befor i went to bed i would get paranoid and thought i was going skitzo.I remeber i was trying to fall asleep and out of nowere i thought"I should go to the market tommroow and get some tomatoes".I fucking hate tomatoes haha and it scared the shit outta me just gettoing random thoughts that i could control.but a huge majority of people go through mental episodes in there life.Youll see better times again,most poeple that are losing there minds dont even know or care for that matter,take syd barret for example.Right now i am the most mentally stble i think ive been in my whole life i never would have believed i would be like this 2 years ago.just ride it out man,maybe a phycyatrist...hope everything turns out for you


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If the doors of perception were cleansed, everything would appear as it is - infinite

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Re: losing my mind [Re: rommstein2001]
    #6099414 -

I've been there man, & you can pull out of it. Stay off drugs, and make it a conscious decision, as often as you can, to remind yourself that you are willingly not taking or touching drugs. For me, knowing that I wasn't going to be doing drugs, in addition to knowing that I wasn't doing any at the moment, provided a huge lift in my recovery. Not being sure whether you're going to expose yourself to the thing that brought you down is a huge detriment to allowing yourself to recouperate.

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Re: losing my mind [Re: rommstein2001]
    #6100200 -

hang in there brother

long live the mangs


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I have considered such matters.

SIKE

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Re: losing my mind [Re: rommstein2001]
    #6101286 -

I also give a recommendation that you take up meditation. When I put lots of time into it I find it pays off big.

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Re: losing my mind [Re: run_rabbit_run]
    #6101347 -

the insane rarely question their sanity...

and i think the ones who do on a regular basis might be the only true sane among us.


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how's your WOW?





  Edited by yageman (04/20/06 4:20 PM) 

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Re: losing my mind [Re: rommstein2001]
    #6101411 -

rommstein2001 said:
After years of use and abuse of many substances it's finally occurring. My sense of reality is shattering and I can't see anything but the transparent reflection on the falling shards. Complex delusions, blackouts. I was even hospitalized after a 5 hour long rampage I don't remember. I'm not depressed at all, but when I have my episodes suicide is often a valid thought just to end the fucking game. Don't fuck with drugs and think you're immortal, I've crossed the threshhold and I'm hoping I come back.


The main problem that I see here is your approach to these problems. You are not losing your mind. Insanity, to me, is a concept. It's a fear that you cannot do something even though you don't know what you want. So.. let's break it down to the lowest common denominator. Breath. There you go. What is so complicated now?

You will probably see stuff for a long time to come, if not forever. I know that I see stuff now even after not having done anything but weed for the past 1.5 years. Just deal with it.

Combat your delusions with logic. Understand, make conclusions, and realize the truth - now and forevermore. =)

I suggest that you take serious measures to get yourself under control. You might go to the doctor and find out why you would lose control like that. Do you know why? You could seriously hurt yourself or somebody else. I suggest getting healthy and keeping yourself in check until you feel a little more stable. I mean really devote every moment of the day to becoming healthy and motivated for something good.


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Smoking my hobbit leaf...
Please keep in mind that I am just a human being. Please read my posts carefully and interpret their meaning for yourself.

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Re: losing my mind [Re: The_Hobbit]
    #6101623 -

ive seen many kids turn psychosis to meth.
if not meth, something in it.

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Re: losing my mind [Re: CptnGarden]
    #6101866 -

going crazy is like getting drugs for free, always.


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No statements made in any post or message by myself should be construed to mean that I am now, or have ever been, participating in or considering participation in any activities in violation of any local, state, or federal laws. All posts are works of fiction.

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Re: losing my mind [Re: kotik]
    #6102238 -

Could this be a spiritual emergence turned into a spiritual emergency? Initiated by psychedelic use?


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Loving in truth, and fain in verse my love to show, That the dear She might take some pleasure of my pain: Pleasure might cause her read, reading might make her know, Knowledge might pity win, and pity grace obtain.

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Re: losing my mind [Re: rommstein2001]
    #6102902 -

Hey, man. As others have already mentioned, you can and will recover. You are not loosing your mind. And if you are, you will get it back. I suggest you get off all drugs for a while, spend more time in nature, start an exercise regime such as running to get yourself grounded again, clean up your diet of all junk food, let people touch you and touch them.

If you want you might also want to experiment with supplements such as L-Tryphothan and /or GABA. They help certain people in this kind of situations.

Above all. Love yourself, take it easy and give it time.  :heart:


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"Who are you who live in all these many forms? You're death that captures all. You too are the source of all that's gonna be born. You're glory, mercy, peace, truth. You give calm a spirit, understanding, courage, the contented heart."

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Re: losing my mind [Re: The_Hobbit]
    #6102918 -

hobbitcg said:
I know that I see stuff now even after not having done anything but weed for the past 1.5 years.


Weed could be the cause of still seeing stuff. Have you tried going off of it for a while and see if things improve?


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"Who are you who live in all these many forms? You're death that captures all. You too are the source of all that's gonna be born. You're glory, mercy, peace, truth. You give calm a spirit, understanding, courage, the contented heart."

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Re: losing my mind [Re: redtailedhawk]
    #6105109 -

I've stopped smoking for months at a time (4 months is the longest timespan). I still see stuff. Infact, I've hallucinated, just as if I were shrooming, after a run.


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Smoking my hobbit leaf...
Please keep in mind that I am just a human being. Please read my posts carefully and interpret their meaning for yourself.

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Re: losing my mind [Re: rommstein2001]
    #6110176 -

Meth psycosis is no joke and can't be cured by running or any other crap mentioned it's a slow steady complete breakdown of normal reality,the only real treatment is Haldol and a psyciatrist and Haldol is not exaclty freindly stuff.I see he hasn't been on in a while I can only hope he went to a real doctor and got treated instead of listening to you guys.If he did he may be dead,meth psycosis leads to extream paranoia almost like schizophrenia normally ending in suicide.It is in no way controlable and can reocur even after regrounding and quiting.Man I know i'm new and you may not respect my opinion but you guys play with some bad mojo sometimes.

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Re: losing my mind [Re: Mr420]
    #6111449 -

I agree with Mr420, this guy could be walking on some very thin ice,

Dude listen man, absolutely do no more drugs for a long time, even stay away from natural stuff for awhile,

Meth almost killed my ass, I had all them chemicals built up in my system, and the stuff doesn't dissipate so quickly,

If your smart, just chill out sober, the meth. will eventually dissipate completely out of your system, if you give it time, I'm talking like 6 months until your fully recovered, I doubt you ever be alright to do stimulants anymore, just stay from all that shit, is my best advice,

because if you OD on meth. , your not going to like it one bit, its a terrible way to die, so keep that in mind if you decide to flirt with that shit again, I mean theres alot more painless ways to go about killing yourself, I'm not condoning suicide, but this approach is beyond idiotic,

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Re: losing my mind [Re: Mr420]
    #6114247 -

Mr420 said:
Meth psycosis is no joke and can't be cured by running or any other crap mentioned it's a slow steady complete breakdown of normal reality,the only real treatment is Haldol and a psyciatrist and Haldol is not exaclty freindly stuff.I see he hasn't been on in a while I can only hope he went to a real doctor and got treated instead of listening to you guys.If he did he may be dead,meth psycosis leads to extream paranoia almost like schizophrenia normally ending in suicide.It is in no way controlable and can reocur even after regrounding and quiting.Man I know i'm new and you may not respect my opinion but you guys play with some bad mojo sometimes.


We all have opinions, bro. We all have experience and common sense. So, if you are so concerned with staying on the straight and narrow, then you might consider saving your generalized judgements for yourself. Logic is the ultimate consideration. Without that, your words are just mojo.


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Smoking my hobbit leaf...
Please keep in mind that I am just a human being. Please read my posts carefully and interpret their meaning for yourself.

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