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Offlineleery11
I Tell You What!

Registered: 06/24/05
Posts: 5,998
Last seen: 8 years, 9 months
HBWR as anti-depressant?
    #5206372 - 01/21/06 12:57 PM (18 years, 11 days ago)

I've been kind of depressed these past two weeks and marijuana didn't seem to help (just fucked my lungs up with bad congestion) .....

today I decided to take 1 HBWR seed as a mood elevator, and by God it really has me feeling alright. Energetic. Wanting to go outside, but not needing to go inside.... okay with being inside. I guess part of the mood lift has to do with me having plans with a friend soon, otherwise I'd be kind of mopey still.

But I don't know. The issue isn't whether or not HBWR would work as an "anti-depressant" I'm sure it would.... the issue is... is it okay to take drugs to make yourself feel better?

I don't plan on taking 1 HBWR seed every day for the rest of my life like people do with prozac, but I might very well take one from time to time until I feel more balanced.

But the problem is I should feel THIS WAY normally, not under the influence. I feel on one seed kind of like how yoga makes me feel for a brief amount of time.

what do you think? Part of it is also I stopped taking 5-htp (wasn't satisfied with it) and I think that is playing a part in my depression right now... so I'm hoping the HBWR will jsut get me back to normal and help me ride this out.


--------------------
I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo!

....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human......
Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!


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Offlinefreddurgan
Techgnostic
Male

Registered: 01/11/04
Posts: 3,648
Last seen: 11 years, 8 months
Re: HBWR as anti-depressant? [Re: leery11]
    #5207121 - 01/21/06 04:27 PM (18 years, 10 days ago)

Well that's pretty much a big question. Is it OK to take a pill to feel happy? Yeah it's OK if you are OK with it. If you take a pill once to make you feel better, does that doom you to take those pills for the rest of your life? No. You can take the pills until you fill the void in your life causing your need for some sort of medication.

There are too many choices in life to worry about the effects of one seed. If it works for you, go for it. It's pretty harmless.

Also dude, since you just had a traumatic acid incident, I wouldn't worry too much about the cause of how you feel. It just takes time sometimes. I know EXACTLY what you went through and even if you don't realize it, those kind of experiences shatter a lot of comfort zones. Just give yourself some time to come to terms with your own brain again.


--------------------
Ishmael
http://www.ishmael.org

Ron Paul 2008!
http://www.ronpaul2008.com/


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OfflineJackattack
Stranger

Registered: 01/16/06
Posts: 150
Last seen: 17 years, 2 months
Re: HBWR as anti-depressant? [Re: freddurgan]
    #5207457 - 01/21/06 06:38 PM (18 years, 10 days ago)

YES it is perfectly fine to self medicate your symptoms of depression. It is wrong to allow yourself to be depressed. I also get depressed and take dimenhydrinate every night to help me cope with it. But Im going to in the future take a big dose of shrooms to see what an egodeath can do for me. I am thinking right now that this could be a very positive thing.


Edited by Jackattack (01/21/06 06:39 PM)


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Offlineleery11
I Tell You What!

Registered: 06/24/05
Posts: 5,998
Last seen: 8 years, 9 months
Re: HBWR as anti-depressant? [Re: freddurgan]
    #5214253 - 01/23/06 02:48 PM (18 years, 9 days ago)

Quote:

freddurgan said:
Well that's pretty much a big question. Is it OK to take a pill to feel happy? Yeah it's OK if you are OK with it. If you take a pill once to make you feel better, does that doom you to take those pills for the rest of your life? No. You can take the pills until you fill the void in your life causing your need for some sort of medication.

There are too many choices in life to worry about the effects of one seed. If it works for you, go for it. It's pretty harmless.

Also dude, since you just had a traumatic acid incident, I wouldn't worry too much about the cause of how you feel. It just takes time sometimes. I know EXACTLY what you went through and even if you don't realize it, those kind of experiences shatter a lot of comfort zones. Just give yourself some time to come to terms with your own brain again.



well dude the "acid" experience was with HBWR, I call HBWR "acid" because I am obsessed with LSD but can't get it, and then the one dude that knows where to get it is really biased against the stuff and tells me that it could kill me and that I shouldn't do it.....

(i wouldn't want to do LSD alone anyway) but yeah, it was well over a month ago.... and IT isn't why I'm depressed. I mean if anything it was trying to convince me to fix things, but then I never did becasue I still harbor paranoia and continue on and on and on in associations of negative thoughtloops about things throughout the day.

but my biggest concern is that the first time I smoked weed it was extremely profound, but then regular use made all the good stuff take a backseat. If I take 1 hbwr a few times a week to make me appreciate life better, will it stop having such a positive affect, and will I make it a habit rather than stop using it like I should?

I don't know. I want to feel this way sober.

that day that I took the HBWR would have sucked if I didn't get to see my friend, so if I do take them I have to make an effort to go out and appreciate people while on it. I might take one at about 3 a.m. tonight, see if it gives me neat dreams, then go up and do yoga while still on a buzz in the morning. This drug reminds me of "yoga" more than anything for some reason (and the yoga instructor)

I should probably also have a good decent sized trip to try and remedy the badish one eventually, but I decided that I shouldn't trip alone, so I'm conflicted.


--------------------
I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo!

....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human......
Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!


Edited by leery11 (01/23/06 02:49 PM)


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InvisibleNeon
Stranger
Male
Registered: 01/04/05
Posts: 497
Re: HBWR as anti-depressant? [Re: leery11]
    #5215994 - 01/23/06 10:38 PM (18 years, 8 days ago)

I really don't think taking HWBR daily is healthy. I've tripped on LSA at least 15 times, if I don't space out my trips enough I feel poisoned. Something in MG and HBWR takes a long time to clear out of my system. Two weeks between trips works well for me. I'm pretty sure taking 1 HBWR daily will have some bad results within a couple weeks. Getting plenty of fiber may help reduce side effects, LSAs sitting in the intestines for long periods of time can't be healthy.

I don't see anything wrong with people taking drugs to make themselves feel better as long as they don't expect the drug to do all the work. My advice would be to switch drugs every 4-8 weeks. Doing so reduces tolerance, allows the body to clean out anything bad that may have built up, and keeps the body and mind from becoming too dependent on any one substance.


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Offlineleery11
I Tell You What!

Registered: 06/24/05
Posts: 5,998
Last seen: 8 years, 9 months
Re: HBWR as anti-depressant? [Re: Neon]
    #5222378 - 01/25/06 04:24 PM (18 years, 6 days ago)

well i haven't taken any more HBWR yet...

but anyway I sat around in the sun today for about 18 minutes and felt wonderful, when I went to class I was calm and meditative (didn't move for about 20-30 minutes) and while in that state I heard the craziest flanging coming from my prof's voice...... i could sense the subtle little nuances of how he spoke, but it was just by chance that I could tune in/out of it, because it was real subtle.

i felt real peaceful, smiling, realized, actualised, beatiful..... it was neat.

I'm thinking maybe still contemplation in the warmth of the sun (which is nice when it's moderately cool/cold out) is what I need..... afterall how much am I out in "nature" in the first place? Maybe one day I should just go nap on campus out in the sun like I see some people doing.

but then i came home and took a nap and now I feel kind of consumed by these draining feelings (in my navel) again.... so I don't know. WHat I do know is I definitely need to just meditate upon energy feelings and subtle sensory perceptions while in classes...... its so much more productive than all my fidgeting and leg shaking and nervousness..... and then I can pay attention to hot girls and try and figure out what their energy is like, and what sex with them would be like on an energy exchange level.

but then that kind of makes me confused and sad about my lack of intimacy.

so yeah. I told myself while in class that I shouldn't do any more drugs for a long while until I feel more calm and figured out (maybe 1-3 weeks [that's a long while to me]) but part of me also wants to take an HBWR sometime this week again to see how it affects my day.

I dunno. I think maybe my drug use has dissociated me from part of myself, because I've been doing TOO MUCH poking and prodding in the depths of my mind, and that's why my navel is acting up on me, but I have no clue. maybe it's just fucked up my chi flow, because i'm starting to get some energy to go through the navel, and it corresponds to some energy in the throat, but my energy in general just seems displaced, maybe from the bad effects of smoke consumption.

but....

i smoked a really fat bowl more than i ever do monday and I still feel the effects from it today, so I think that's what I need to do with weed, just once a week or less than that smoke A LOT so that I get really damn high.... and then enjoy the after effects for the next several days.


--------------------
I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo!

....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human......
Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!


Edited by leery11 (01/25/06 04:26 PM)


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Offlinegregorio
Too Damn Old
Male

Registered: 09/08/05
Posts: 2,831
Loc: Classified
Last seen: 6 years, 4 months
Re: HBWR as anti-depressant? [Re: leery11]
    #5223887 - 01/25/06 09:54 PM (18 years, 6 days ago)

What is HBWR?

First time that I have ever heard of it.


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Offlineleery11
I Tell You What!

Registered: 06/24/05
Posts: 5,998
Last seen: 8 years, 9 months
Re: HBWR as anti-depressant? [Re: gregorio]
    #5225633 - 01/26/06 11:25 AM (18 years, 6 days ago)

hawaain baby woodrose seeds.


--------------------
I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo!

....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human......
Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!


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Offlinegregorio
Too Damn Old
Male

Registered: 09/08/05
Posts: 2,831
Loc: Classified
Last seen: 6 years, 4 months
Re: HBWR as anti-depressant? [Re: leery11]
    #5229996 - 01/27/06 06:19 AM (18 years, 5 days ago)

That's what I thought  :smirk:

Ive heard of them before after all.


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