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You caught my eye at the orgy the other night....
    #5021764 -

I wanted to talk to you, but you are so much more attractive than most of the middle-aged has-beens in last night's pile that I couldn't get a moment alone, or even as part of a threesome or foursome with you. There was a brief moment, while you were reverse cowgirling that old guy and jerking off two midgets while orally satisfying the butch chick in the leather chaps, when our eyes met, and it was magic.

First, I want to be clear that I wasn't calling you a filthy whore, it was the woman I was doggy-styling, and that was only after her repeated insistence that I talk dirty to her. I promise I would treat you more respectfully than that.

I also want to make clear that I don't normally go down on other guys, but since you were taken and she was the only other attractive woman there, and part of the package was that her husband had to get in on the action, well, desperate times call for desperate acts...

Anyway, the point is, I think I love you. I know, we've not met, and I don't think any of my semen actually ended up in you, though we can't be sure of that, now can we, but probably not, so that makes us complete strangers. But there was that moment, that electric moment, before you started to gyrate wildly and cry out in some foreign language (was that French? I love French), and before I had to take on that unsavory but necessary oral task that I'd just as soon forget, except for this persistent heartburn I've got today, when we connected, and it was as if I could see into your soul, and you into mine.

So can't we give it a try? All I'm asking for is a cup of coffee. And perhaps a threesome, if your roommate is hot, or if we meet a sexy stranger on the street. But let's just start by getting to know each other, okay?

Look, in this crazy, mixed up world we call earth, if you can't take a chance when you connect with someone even though you haven't yet fucked them, then when can you take a chance? Write back, my love.


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Correlation is not causation!

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Re: You caught my eye at the orgy the other night.... [Re: Signo]
    #5021811 -

I love you to.


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The secret to being funny is to say smart things stupidly, or is it stupid things smartly? Whatever..it's not rocket surgery...or something like that.

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Re: You caught my eye at the orgy the other night.... [Re: Signo]
    #5022131 -

Im all yours baby :cool:


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yawn...
SG

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Re: You caught my eye at the orgy the other night.... [Re: Stonerguy]
    #5023225 -

haha thats a good one :laugh:
peace ohm :mushroom2:


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:penis: MONOTUB tek :sun: HEATBOMB tek :penis:

RIP #cultivation! ....can't associate? well FUCK U !

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Re: You caught my eye at the orgy the other night.... [Re: Signo]
    #5023229 -

gyrate is the best word

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Re: You caught my eye at the orgy the other night.... [Re: Signo]
    #5023230 -

lol. i love this site....


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\m/ Spanksta \m/

"do you have the freedom to do with your nervous system what you want?"

"MolokoMilkPlus said:
I'll respect you if you let me give you a blow job"

"tactik said:
respect the can."


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Re: You caught my eye at the orgy the other night.... [Re: Signo]
    #5023251 -

Is this an Onion piece? It reads like one.

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Re: You caught my eye at the orgy the other night.... [Re: Signo]
    #5023497 -

That's pretty damn funny. Did you write it yourself? If so, awesome! If not, please don't plagiarize. :\


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Supercollider? I just met her!

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Re: You caught my eye at the orgy the other night.... [Re: Burke Dennings]
    #5023502 -

e-chode said:
Is this an Onion piece? It reads like one.


whats an onion piece?


--------------------
\m/ Spanksta \m/

"do you have the freedom to do with your nervous system what you want?"

"MolokoMilkPlus said:
I'll respect you if you let me give you a blow job"

"tactik said:
respect the can."


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Re: You caught my eye at the orgy the other night.... [Re: eligal]
    #5023529 -

http://www.theonion.com/content/index


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Re: You caught my eye at the orgy the other night.... [Re: Shroomism]
    #5024976 -

Since I was asked, I will say that it isn't an original of mine, it was taken from craigslist. Hopefully the Dean of Shroomery won't kick me out of the .org for plagiarizing.


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Correlation is not causation!

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