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Mushrooms, Mycology and Psychedelics > The Psychedelic Experience
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My highest dose, very strange and scary
    #3964081 -

Yesterday a Friend and i split a half oz of cubensis in tea. Now this is a pretty high dose but i was confident i would be able to handle it considering i had done around 3 grams the other day and my tolerance was up.
We ingested the tea in two sessions. First half the tea was injested and we waited around half an hour. Things started to change just like a normal psilocybin intoxication then, both feeling very high decided to drink the rest of it.
Now this decision was a hard one to make because we didn't have any marijuana and we knew it would help.
We picked some up and our dealer asked if we wanted to come match him at his farm. I wasn't that high at this point and it seemed just like a really trippy mushroom trip. Nothing special at all.
We got to his farm at t+1hr and we sat around his campfire(not burning) and loaded up his 5 foot ice bong. We took some rips and this is when things really started to get strange. After about 3 hits i decided i didn't want anymore, my buddies made it seem like i pussied out and didn't want anymore when in fact things were just too intense.
I looked up and things weren't right, there was this one scene that keeps recurring in my head. It was us sitting around this unburning fire and i looked at his farm pastures. The fences were just so fake and plastic, they stook out of the world, punctuated its very existance out and everything just scared me so much. I calmed down a little bit and reassured myself everything was going to be OK and our dealer saw i was getting a bit uncomfortable sitting outside and preceded to show us his "extra trippy" house.
As soon as i stepped into his old decrepit wood house i sensed a great feeling of dejevu, like i had been there my whole life and knew the house top to bottom. It was very strangely built with lots of high ceilings and no definite rooms. I got so overwhelmed with fear because everything was so familiar and confusing I asked our dealer if he could drive us back to my buddies house. I felt i would be alot more comfortable there. I even apologized and said he had a beautiful house, but in my current state i couldn't be there.
It felt like i was losing grip with reality. When i go back and think about it, i didn't even have any visuals when i looked up at his fences, things were just so clear and shiny, plastic even.
After he drove us back to my buddies house i calmed down a bit and relaxed, things were still very strange and alien, my Friend kept morphing and i loved it. I felt very good sitting around the fire and we talked for hours. My body was spinning with emotions and i cried.
Now before this trip i was absolutely sure i had experienced the full high that mushrooms had to offer. When i was sitting at the farm things were just too strange and alien to comprehend. I got so scared and the only thing i can relate it to was my salvia experiences. Just losing grip.
I kept saying to my friend, its so intense but I'll be able to handle it.
One word for this trip, intense.

Now i don't know if i experienced ego loss at the farm but it sure felt like it. I didn't remember who i was or what was going on, all i could see was that the world was so alien like and different.

Any opinions? I cant stop thinking about that one moment.


--------------------
"Much madness is divinest sense"
Dickinson, Emily

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Re: My highest dose, very strange and scary [Re: Grovesk8ter]
    #3964103 -

Sounds like you had an intense trip my friend.

Yea, I once thought I knew most of the mushroom realm until I had my first bad trip where I fought for my life (ego), so I wasn't able to achieve ego-loss.  There was so much more to experience and feel, and i know that there is still alot for me to experience (once I get over the fear of losing myself)

Did you experience ego-loss? I don't think so.  From what I read, if your ego started to dissolve completely in the setting you were in and such, you would have probably shit yourself!  :shrug:

Edited by Ginseng1 (03/24/05 09:15 AM)

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Re: My highest dose, very strange and scary [Re: Ginseng1]
    #3964114 -

Yeah it was pretty intense. I'm red-green colorblind and usually i cant see many colors on my trip.
This one was fullblown psychadelia. Red was the most abundent color.


--------------------
"Much madness is divinest sense"
Dickinson, Emily

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Re: My highest dose, very strange and scary [Re: Grovesk8ter]
    #3964118 -

But i'm still just so conflicted in my mind about this. I felt something i've never felt before. Just so confused and alien.


--------------------
"Much madness is divinest sense"
Dickinson, Emily

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Re: My highest dose, very strange and scary [Re: Grovesk8ter]
    #3964128 -

Well, just remember it's all part of the psychedelic experience.  Another experience of life.

You'll get over it in no time, and whatever it is that you learned during your trip, is a lesson tailored solely for YOU by the shrooms.

Let it be, accept it, everything is gonna be ok!  :sun: :mushroom2: :laugh:


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Flowing through beginningless time since time without beginning...

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Re: My highest dose, very strange and scary [Re: Ginseng1]
    #3964133 -

Oh yea, I used to skate, it was the only time I felt 100% at peace and felt like everything was good. Go for a skate and reminisce the experience maybe that will help?


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Flowing through beginningless time since time without beginning...

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Re: My highest dose, very strange and scary [Re: Grovesk8ter]
    #3964142 -

Grovesk8ter said:
Yeah it was pretty intense. I'm red-green colorblind and usually i cant see many colors on my trip.
This one was fullblown psychadelia. Red was the most abundent color.


Just curious... how did you know it was red?


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It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!

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Re: My highest dose, very strange and scary [Re: BloodNOil]
    #3964163 -

hmm.... because i related that color to the red i've always seen.
Colorblindness isnt a lack of color, its a perception disorientation. My colors look different.


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"Much madness is divinest sense"
Dickinson, Emily

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Re: My highest dose, very strange and scary [Re: Grovesk8ter]
    #3964187 -

buddy thats fuckin' dope. my record was 5gs of potent cubensis but 7!! it's funny how even if we try to write a trip report we know that the words are nothing compared to teh experience, we just do our best to put it in to words even though.
but way to go buddy to live and tell about the trip! haha sounds like ego-loss was just around the corner, but i dont know if thats something i'd wanna experience.

take it easy, peace.


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?Religion is science, politics is Hollywood, and 50 cent is more influential than Dali Lama; welcome to the future?
-Fontaine

"Blessed are the peacemakers." Matthew 5:9

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Re: My highest dose, very strange and scary [Re: Grovesk8ter]
    #3964372 -

Sounds like your ego was on the way out. Maybe not total ego loss, but your ego was definately not in the drivers seat for awhile. It may take you a few more whams to get where your goin.

This is what your looking for if your on the path for transformation. Yes it's werd for sure, you may experience some melancholia, or other werd feelings or states. Don't worry, soon everything will begin to fall in place. Once the ego is out of the way even for an instant, other aspects of the self come into play. Change will happen automatically now. Just relax and let it happen.

When you feel an inner voice calling you to repeat this process you will know you are ready for your next dose of reality.

You are blessed. Pay attention to how you use these plants. They are the real deal.


--------------------
"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC

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Re: My highest dose, very strange and scary [Re: Icelander]
    #3964847 -

^^^^^^^ Knows what he is talking about.


--------------------
No ONE wants to know the ultimate TRUTH, as soon as YOU find IT out, YOU want to forget IT.

You are everything's way of feeling itself.

Happy Schwag, everygodly!

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Mushrooms, Mycology and Psychedelics > The Psychedelic Experience
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