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The problem with polyamory and swingers towns
    #29628763 -

In my experience there's an abundance of toxicity, usually based around envy and jealousy and the liberal sleeping around leads to extreme gossiping and lack of discretion about women's potential love interests.

NOBODY hooks other people up because everyone wants to sleep with everyone rather than see another person happy

Women in open relationships can wrap every man around their finger except the rare sigma who wants something deeper than a shallow fuck so they end up with extreme resentment to anyone who doesn't appease their ego

Nobodys cup is ever full, everyone wants more and more and more because the absence of a strong exclusive 1 on 1 bond leads to a pattern of partners trying to outdo one another. Most are trying to fill a hole with physical connections that should be satiated with an emotional bond.

Men who aren't much desired do their best to exclude new competition. Women who have an eye for someone end up the reason why other women consider a guy off limits

There's literally sodom and gomorrah type shit gaining popularity in small town America and it feels like some brave new world type shit going on

Monogamous love is shunned and lust is promoted. People endorse feeding animalistic desire rather than rising above it

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Re: The problem with polyamory and swingers towns [Re: winzlo7] * 5
    #29628887 -

Other peoples sex life got you bugging friend, maybe start with that.


--------------------

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Currently working on:
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Re: The problem with polyamory and swingers towns [Re: Cicadoidea]
    #29629115 -

Cicadoidea said:
Other peoples sex life got you bugging friend, maybe start with that.


What's got me bugging is 5 years of fuckery. You simply cannot imagine the nonsense I've dealt with. Wish I never moved here.

I'm kept a pariah by outside influence, I've been told more than once "I'd love to give you my number but I'm not allowed I'll get fired", been told women were specifically told not to, I've seen girls who told people they don't give a shit if they're not supposed to theyll get with me if they want to then get fired for the biggest nonsense (she got her phone number to me anyway, assholes!)

That's what happens when they eventually find out that everything they heard about me was wrong and way off. I've never had schizophrenia and never been crazy. I've never been a creep. Never been desperate(have had too many unattractive options for them to possibly cockblock me from) unfortunately what I desire cant be given to me from any woman who I know won't ever possibly trigger my hopeless romantic feelings

Usually I meet women, they seem interested, they see what they can find out about me or what strangers think about me then suddenly they aren't interested which is NOT a bad thing, I DO like when they sort themselves out or show me who they are but the rare occasions of strong mutual attraction are ALWAYS interfered with, everytime without fail

I honestly may be giving up on the idea of love and there's no bigger turn off than heartache and the fuckery kills my libido so maybe I'll go back to being celibate

I know a lot of my problems have been caused by narcissistic distant family members who don't know me and have no right to speak about me but if this community had some real love then at some point a 3rd party would do the OPPOSITE of sabotage and cockblock and bridge the gaps caused by shitty people

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Re: The problem with polyamory and swingers towns [Re: winzlo7] * 2
    #29630789 -

I am part of a harem not a polycule.

:smilingpuppy:


--------------------
Maiden, Mother, and Crone.

You are Me and I am You.

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Re: The problem with polyamory and swingers towns [Re: SARAtonin]
    #29631322 -

SARAtonin said:
I am part of a harem not a polycule.

:smilingpuppy:


Give it time it will happen.  Op is right to many "drives" in your town/community can ruin the magic and cause personal and professional problems. Id recommend he move to a place he feels safe and not crowded.


--------------------
The better guide to grow mushrooms.
https://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php/Number/8553541

Beware the power of one.  The power of two. The power of many.

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Re: The problem with polyamory and swingers towns [Re: vicepope]
    #29631436 -

Agreed, without having time to read all of the 2nd response the solution seems clear, go somewhere else. Most the people I know here in OC are very normal.

Don’t have a problem with whatever love lives others want for themselves, you do you. But married and monogamous is my style. My wife and I knowing exactly who each of us fucked last and not having to question shit is a great stress not to have in our lives.


--------------------
notapillow said: "you are going about this endeavor all wrong. clear your mind of useless fear and concern. buy the ticket, take the ride, and all that.... "

ChrisWho said: "It's all about the journey, not the destination."

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Re: The problem with polyamory and swingers towns [Re: vicepope]
    #29631492 -

vicepope said:
SARAtonin said:
I am part of a harem not a polycule.

:smilingpuppy:


Give it time it will happen.  Op is right to many "drives" in your town/community can ruin the magic and cause personal and professional problems. Id recommend he move to a place he feels safe and not crowded.


“Give it time it will happen.” What do you even mean?

My wife and I have two partners, all four of us are dating each other, living with each other and are in a closed relationship.

I have nothing against poly people, but I don’t really consider myself to be in a polycule.


--------------------
Maiden, Mother, and Crone.

You are Me and I am You.

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Re: The problem with polyamory and swingers towns [Re: SARAtonin]
    #29631828 -

SARAtonin said:
vicepope said:
SARAtonin said:
I am part of a harem not a polycule.

:smilingpuppy:


Give it time it will happen.  Op is right to many "drives" in your town/community can ruin the magic and cause personal and professional problems. Id recommend he move to a place he feels safe and not crowded.


“Give it time it will happen.” What do you even mean?

My wife and I have two partners, all four of us are dating each other, living with each other and are in a closed relationship.

I have nothing against poly people, but I don’t really consider myself to be in a polycule.



i fuck dudes but i don't consider myself gay

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Re: The problem with polyamory and swingers towns [Re: AlChemicalResearch]
    #29631994 -

Sounds like prison


--------------------
hmm...

"I'm naked and fearless... And my fear is naked."

"life isn't worth living without the threat of death"

"I got my plans in a ziploc bag, let's see how unproductive we can be"

"nobody lives their lives fully except for bull fighters"

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Re: The problem with polyamory and swingers towns [Re: vicepope]
    #29632395 -

vicepope said:
SARAtonin said:
I am part of a harem not a polycule.

:smilingpuppy:


Give it time it will happen.  Op is right to many "drives" in your town/community can ruin the magic and cause personal and professional problems. Id recommend he move to a place he feels safe and not crowded.


Currently feeling stuck here due to circumstances beyond my control but yes eventually I plan to move.
I feel like my morals and my values are the cause of a lot of my problems and seriously question continuing to live by them

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Re: The problem with polyamory and swingers towns [Re: winzlo7]
    #29632882 -

Or you could just be like an adult and tell people you wanna have healthy boundaries.
Sounds a lot more expensive to move because you feel like people have sexual hang ups. You don't have to have sexual hang ups just because they do.
Why don't you chill out and just try and focus on yourself for a while instead of trying to fuck your brains out to make some hole in yourself get filled.

Possible suggestion. You could also move.
It's up to you ultimately.


--------------------

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Re: The problem with polyamory and swingers towns [Re: winzlo7]
    #29640972 -

The fundamental problem is one of selection bias. Swingers are exciting, experimental , experiential people who crave excitement, experiments and experience.

That's POISON for keeping everything balanced, fair and drama-free.

The ideal Swinger is a very stable, staid and self actualized person but those rarely get into the lifestyle in the first place.


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Time is nature's way of making sure that everything doesn't happen at once.

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