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Need advice for this situation that I am in. (Woman trouble)
    #25145231 -

I'm going to try to make this short and sweet and go directly to my point but it is always hard without context. Basically I am seeing my Ex girlfriend (My first love) , we actually been on and off for the good part of 2 years since the initial break up.

I love this girl to death, and I enjoy being with her but I find that I am always in the need to apologize to her for petty things and when I bring a subject up that bothers me, I should just suck it up.It is like talking to a wall that does not acknowledge my feelings. I truly feel that she takes me for granted the majority of the time. I am always afraid of losing her by confronting her about things that bother me , because I know she will try to spin it up on me.


Anyhow, yesterday we were supposed to see each other at 10:00pm but turns out it was going to be later (around 12:00pm),I don't mind this at all.

We were speaking on the phone and the reason why she couldn't meet at 10:00 was because of this paper that she needs to finish but has been procrastinating on it. I simply asked why she hasn't done it before then she changes the tone of her voice to an aggressive one and proceeds to say that sometimes she wants to relax and have time to think since she has 2 jobs (part-time) and that if she was working 3-11 it be so much easier. This is the part that bothered me the most, because I work 3-11 full time at my job. I find that she used that to say, look you don't understand you just do 3-11 and that is so easy, anybody could do that. I am sure anybody could do that but I find the tone and way she said it, it was really condescending and seemed like she did not respect what I do or me. After she finished her rant, I basically told her to take it down a notch, she is a bit to much for me right now, then she proceeds to tell me that I am pissing her off and hangs up on me.

She calls an hour later at around 12:00, I am already in bed and don't feel like seeing her after what happened  because I was bummed out and decide to ignore the call and go to bed.

This morning, I send her a nice text asking her if she wants to go eat out to make sure there isn't any hard feelings. Politely declines as she has commitments,  fast forward a bit and then she calls me so we can figure out at what time we can see each other today and we talk. It seems fine, but then she says that yesterday I was sassy towards her. I ask her how was I sassy, with an annoyed voice and then she just brush it off, ask her again and then she says Good bye and hangs up.

This really gets on my nerve, I feel like I am being put aside and taken for granted. I juste hate the fact that she ignores this problem, as small as it is, because she doesn't want to get in a fight. But I don't think there would be a fight if she would just listen and maybe hear my side instead of just shutting me down right away.


Anyhow, I don't know if I am overreacting. I am trying to figure out what should I do, because I know that kind of behaviours isn't good for me. I feel that I can't truly express how I feel and must suck it up by the fear of losing her.

Now I am supposed to see her tonight, but I don't feel like it. If I see her I must forget what happened and put it aside or tell her how I felt and how I find this annoying.


I need advice peps, I need to know what you guys think.


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Why so much hate mate?

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Re: Need advice for this situation that I am in. (Woman trouble) [Re: Bumbaa] * 3
    #25145239 -

Get a guitar and a sex doll, neither will treat you bad :thumbup:


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High as hell and low as heaven will go.....(this account is automated, all posts related to illegal activities or advice thereof are strictly from numerous online sites and are for informational purposes only)- Circa 2011
Ban lotto

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Re: Need advice for this situation that I am in. (Woman trouble) [Re: spirit_shadow] * 2
    #25145245 -

Then after you fuck the doll you can say " what did you just say?" "Oh thats right :cool:" *play guitar*


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High as hell and low as heaven will go.....(this account is automated, all posts related to illegal activities or advice thereof are strictly from numerous online sites and are for informational purposes only)- Circa 2011
Ban lotto

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Re: Need advice for this situation that I am in. (Woman trouble) [Re: spirit_shadow] * 1
    #25145246 -

Ultimately it will keep failing until some proper communication can be established. If she's not willing to communicate and fix issues then you're fighting a losing battle.


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Enjoying my journey to transcendence whilst also enjoying my human experience. Lessthan3Bees does not have anything to do with the insect :wink:

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Re: Need advice for this situation that I am in. (Woman trouble) [Re: Lessthan3Bees] * 2
    #25145252 -

But for real what she said. If it does nothig than hurt you just move on. I wish you the best man :shroomeryhead:


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High as hell and low as heaven will go.....(this account is automated, all posts related to illegal activities or advice thereof are strictly from numerous online sites and are for informational purposes only)- Circa 2011
Ban lotto

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Re: Need advice for this situation that I am in. (Woman trouble) [Re: Bumbaa] * 3
    #25145255 -

It sounds like she's being a bitch

Or you're being a whiny cunt

Cant tell you from here, but if this kind of arguing goes on all the time thats pretty toxic and Id jump ship

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Re: Need advice for this situation that I am in. (Woman trouble) [Re: Bumbaa]
    #25145257 -

In my opinion, you are being taken for granted and put aside. If she reacts this way to something so small and can't even explain what she means and is hanging up on you consistently instead of talking through your problems, imagine how she will act when real problems come up.

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Re: Need advice for this situation that I am in. (Woman trouble) [Re: Repertoire89]
    #25145260 -

spirit_shadow said:
Then after you fuck the doll you can say " what did you just say?" "Oh thats right :cool:" *play guitar*




Fking lol'd
Repertoire89 said:
It sounds like she's being a bitch

Or you're being a whiny cunt

Cant tell you from here, but if this kind of arguing goes on all the time thats pretty toxic and Id jump ship


This is what I am being trying to figure out. I am just being a whiny bitch?

I just don't know.


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Why so much hate mate?

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Re: Need advice for this situation that I am in. (Woman trouble) [Re: Lessthan3Bees] * 5
    #25145261 -

If you're constantly apologizing for petty nonsense, you have lost control of the relationship. It's over and move on.

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Re: Need advice for this situation that I am in. (Woman trouble) [Re: Bumbaa] * 1
    #25145267 -

Wanting to communicate doesn't make you a whiny bitch, although I don't know the entire context of the relationship. If she's ignoring the issues and just manipulating you into doing everything her way then that just makes her a narcissistic bitch. Put your foot down and call her out on the shit. If you've been on and off for 2 years then clearly something isn't working and that something isn't being addressed.


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Enjoying my journey to transcendence whilst also enjoying my human experience. Lessthan3Bees does not have anything to do with the insect :wink:

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Re: Need advice for this situation that I am in. (Woman trouble) [Re: Bumbaa]
    #25145297 -

Ive had 2 different ex's who were unreasonably inconsiderate, there was a lot to bring up and it would probably make me look whiny except Im sure they were both cheating... otherwise they were socially retarded.

Normally I think its best to leave a lot of stuff unsaid and minimize melodrama, after my last messy relationship Im not willing to deal with any level of melodrama bs again. It was a waste of time and on hindsight idk why I dealt with it for as long as I did (a few months in either case)



Lessthan3Bees said:
Wanting to communicate doesn't make you a whiny bitch


Sometimes it does, they're out there and I know a few.

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Re: Need advice for this situation that I am in. (Woman trouble) [Re: Repertoire89]
    #25145304 -

I'll give you that. That's why I said I don't know the entirety of the context. Either way it sounds like a lost cause.


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Enjoying my journey to transcendence whilst also enjoying my human experience. Lessthan3Bees does not have anything to do with the insect :wink:

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Re: Need advice for this situation that I am in. (Woman trouble) [Re: Lessthan3Bees] * 2
    #25145428 -

i thought there was an actual woman in trouble who made this thread and was prepared to offer help to a damsel in distress...hella disappoint :nonono:


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Re: Need advice for this situation that I am in. (Woman trouble) [Re: qman] * 3
    #25146202 -

qman said:
If you're constantly apologizing for petty nonsense, you have lost control of the relationship.



control of the relationship? 

no party should control a relationship.  that's some dysfunctional shit right there.

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Re: Need advice for this situation that I am in. (Woman trouble) [Re: relic] * 2
    #25146216 -

qman has 1950s values. Women and blacks should know their place.


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NotSheekle said
“if I believed she was 16 I would become unattracted to her”

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Re: Need advice for this situation that I am in. (Woman trouble) [Re: koods]
    #25146295 -

One question:  Would you want to spend the rest of your life with her and her acting like she currently does?

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Re: Need advice for this situation that I am in. (Woman trouble) [Re: relic]
    #25146405 -

relic said:
qman said:
If you're constantly apologizing for petty nonsense, you have lost control of the relationship.



control of the relationship? 

no party should control a relationship.  that's some dysfunctional shit right there.


He's being controlled by this woman, that's the issue here.

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Re: Need advice for this situation that I am in. (Woman trouble) [Re: qman] * 1
    #25148368 -

qman said:
relic said:
qman said:
If you're constantly apologizing for petty nonsense, you have lost control of the relationship.



control of the relationship? 

no party should control a relationship.  that's some dysfunctional shit right there.


He's being controlled by this woman, that's the issue here.


You're implying that he should be the one in control, though. Neither scenario is healthy. Both parties should have mutual respect and work to make sure there is equal footing in the relationship. At the same token, you can put someone in their place when they're being a cunt without "being in control"--just demanding some much deserved respect.


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Edited by Mercurious (04/18/18 05:33 PM)

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Re: Need advice for this situation that I am in. (Woman trouble) [Re: Bumbaa]
    #25148566 -

Trust your gut dude.  It doesn't sound healthy.

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Re: Need advice for this situation that I am in. (Woman trouble) [Re: Mercurious]
    #25148615 -

Mercurious said:
qman said:
relic said:
qman said:
If you're constantly apologizing for petty nonsense, you have lost control of the relationship.



control of the relationship? 

no party should control a relationship.  that's some dysfunctional shit right there.


He's being controlled by this woman, that's the issue here.


You're implying that he should be the one in control, though. Neither scenario is healthy. Both parties should have mutual respect and work to make sure there is equal footing in the relationship. At the same token, you can put someone in their place when they're being a cunt without "being in control"--just demanding some much deserved respect.


I don't think he implied that at all. I think you're trying to put a male chauvinist spin on his post

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