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ergoticmandala



Registered: 06/03/15
Posts: 1,256
Last seen: 4 years, 28 days
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im fucked in the head
#23894113 - 12/04/16 02:23 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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not sure if things are getting darker but they haven't been great for a while
I just can't focus in school I have super bad senioritis, im in hs and am graduating in like 5 months but i have no motivation to even try any more
I just don't see why I get up any more, every day I care less and less
I'm just waiting to move back to the US and go to college presumably but I don't even know if I can do that, i'm riddled with negative thoughts and I don't have any drive. I want to get a ritalin prescription just so I can use that to sort of motivate me and keep me alive till I go back to the states but i'm not doing any of the things I love to do because I'm outside of the US and i'm homesick asf, i've been here for a year and a half already.
Should I get the ritalin script, my only concern is that I will become dependent on that in order to do any sort of work, if I used it to get thru the next 6 months. I also have no access to drugs, fucking used my whole supply which was 900mg of DXM, some kratom and 4 tabs of acid. All I can get here is alcohol and tobacco, fuck me.
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trees


Registered: 02/08/09
Posts: 9,194
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Ritalin will make you feel worse for sure. You need to think about what you want in life. If you want materials and money, go for business. If you want to contribute to humanity, go for an agriculture degree, I remember u said you wanted to grow cactus.
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Edited by trees (12/04/16 02:30 PM)
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Skellies


Registered: 06/02/15
Posts: 822
Loc: The Dream
Last seen: 1 day, 1 hour
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Re: im fucked in the head [Re: trees]
#23894141 - 12/04/16 02:35 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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I don't have much experience with ritalin but I have experience with adderall which I use to mitigate adhd for work/school. I've found that you have to be careful, making sure that your actually doing work right when you take it and not other shit. Otherwise it will give you an enjoyable buzz but you won't get anything done.
I would try to find some motivation to do work first.
-------------------- Nosleep mode: Activated
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starfire_xes
I Am 'They'



Registered: 10/24/09
Posts: 21,590
Loc: Dallas with all the assho...
Last seen: 7 months, 2 days
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Re: im fucked in the head [Re: Skellies]
#23894151 - 12/04/16 02:39 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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yep, urban fucked in the head alright.
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IF THE NEIGHBORS COMPLAIN BECAUSE THE MUSIC'S TOO LOUD, TURN IT UP SO YOU CAN'T HEAR THEM BITCH
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PumpJackTeX
livin life



Registered: 05/26/08
Posts: 3,951
Loc: California
Last seen: 10 months, 30 days
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We are all fucked in the head.
Look at it in a positive way, live life, & die.
The more you understand the less this world makes sense.
-------------------- Life. 2008 Ascension Energy | UFOs | 2021
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Repertoire89
Cat



Registered: 11/15/12
Posts: 21,773
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Taking drugs to fill a hole in your life where purpose should be
Great idea
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spirit_shadow
Feature not a bug



Registered: 08/15/11
Posts: 25,674
Last seen: 6 hours, 44 minutes
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Its just your hormones. You will grow out of it.
-------------------- ERROR 418 IM A TEAPOT.....(this account is automated, all posts related to illegal activities or advice thereof are strictly from numerous online sites and are for informational purposes only)- Circa 2011 Ban lotto
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Chakra Shock
Waxing Prophetic


Registered: 02/22/13
Posts: 2,514
Loc: The Enterprise
Last seen: 3 years, 8 months
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The main problem here probably has nothing to do with where you are or your lack of drugs. The problem here is that you have no motivation. This is a self-perpetuating feeling, because the more you feel it, the less you feel like doing anything which can help you break the cycle.
The only thing to do is to rally your troops, charge the batteries and light your fire. Even if it seems trivial or banal, take anything as an opportunity to do your best. School, exercise, being kind to people in public, anything and everything, just turn it up and try to do it better.
Also, don't suppress the feeling of purposelessness. Observe it, and live your life to the fullest, and eventually you will gravitate towards that which transforms that purposelessness into purpose.
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Repertoire89
Cat



Registered: 11/15/12
Posts: 21,773
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I think thats solid advice chakra
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OhMrJohnson
Ashes Against The Grain

Registered: 01/12/14
Posts: 17,544
Loc: Terra Incognita
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Diminish the sub-principle and leave its toxic trace.. Once and for all!
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searching



Registered: 06/08/11
Posts: 4,128
Last seen: 5 months, 5 days
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Well pretty soon you will have a reason to be motivated and that will be because you have to work to make money and survive. But if you can't find motivation now to finish school then you'll have to work a whole lot harder for the rest of your life for a lot less money. School isn't that hard anyway compared to real work. Just finish and go to college then you might have it pretty easy.
But yeah, I do understand not having motivation. My best advice to jump start yourself is to start working out. It will make you feel good and give you the physical energy to do things. If you sit around all day you won't feel like doing much besides sitting around.
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ergoticmandala



Registered: 06/03/15
Posts: 1,256
Last seen: 4 years, 28 days
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Re: im fucked in the head [Re: searching]
#23896297 - 12/05/16 09:43 AM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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I have started going to soccer practice again and its really been helping, I need to suck it up and exercise and do well in school, I have all B's so I can at least maintain this
But I may still try to get the ritalin as an extra push. I have really figured some things out, I just need to do everything I do to the fullest because if not its a cycle of being sad that I did bad and being sad that i'm sad. Thanks for the advice guys. Also, do any of you watch yourmatetom on youtube, he has some insightful advice regarding psychedelics, self improvement and living life to the fullest
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hostileuniverse
Stranger



Registered: 05/14/15
Posts: 8,602
Loc: 'Merica
Last seen: 6 years, 7 months
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Alcohol can be a wonderful transformative elixer, don't doubt it's power
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