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Offlinef8L
Triumph

Registered: 09/07/02
Posts: 397
Last seen: 11 years, 2 days
Completely managed to fuck up a good relationship....
    #2316517 - 02/09/04 12:56 AM (20 years, 1 month ago)

I had been dating an incredible female for three weeks. For those three weeks we nearly spent every day together, connecting on many levels (she expressed she also felt the same). Yet, there was very little intimacy in our relationship, despite the fact that she tells me she considers herself a nympho and is a very sexual person. When I tried to make a move or show her affection, she would often tell me to "calm down."

Last week, I spoke to her about this problem and she responded that we could possibly be intimate in the future, just not now. She reinterated that she was just in a long term relationship 5 months ago, and did not want another one. She said she was confortable with simply "kissing and holding hands." I told her that I felt like she was using me for companionship and that if I'm spending this much time with her, I need to know I can show her affection without her rejecting me.

That was the last time I spoke to her. I haven't called her since, and she hasn't called me. I'm just empty and confused about how the situation flipped on me. I really like this girl and would like to continue to develop the relationship--I think she took it as I did not want to see her anymore, which is not the case.

Just wanted to here your comments, since I am utterly lost for what to do.

Edited by f8L (02/09/04 01:03 AM)

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Invisibleadrug

Registered: 02/04/03
Posts: 15,800
Re: Completely managed to fuck up a good relationship.... [Re: f8L]
    #2316527 - 02/09/04 01:01 AM (20 years, 1 month ago)

First things first, CALL HER! If you don't, she'll probably think you had less than noble intentions in spending all that time with her. It seems to me if you want a relationship with this person you're going to have to take it slow or move on.

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InvisibleSuffer
puter dork
 User Gallery

Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 03/05/99
Posts: 1,090
Loc: MA
Re: Completely managed to fuck up a good relationship.... [Re: f8L]
    #2316541 - 02/09/04 01:09 AM (20 years, 1 month ago)

I agree with adrug on this one... and believe me, you should trust a womans advice on this matter.

Take it one step at a time. If she said in the future... the all hope isnt lost. CALL HER!


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OfflineSlapnutRob
Toolhead

Registered: 03/31/03
Posts: 520
Loc: Michigan
Last seen: 14 years, 8 months
Re: Completely managed to fuck up a good relationship.... [Re: adrug]
    #2316616 - 02/09/04 01:43 AM (20 years, 1 month ago)

I wish I could be in that situation. I got fucked over in my last attempted relationship. I'd call her and make sure she understood your intentions. If she doesn't get back to talking to you for over two weeks, I think it might be a lost cause.


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Anything stated above is fictional roleplay dialog by the character that is Slapnut Rob, in no way representing the actions or beliefs of the man behind the keys.

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Anonymous #1

Re: Completely managed to fuck up a good relationship.... [Re: f8L]
    #2316996 - 02/09/04 07:37 AM (20 years, 1 month ago)

some girls may feel that, if they put out you will just leave them because that is all your after. By holding off, its like a test i guess, you can either pass or fail mang. Get a good woman like that, you dont want a slutty bitch prone to go fuck your homies.

Call her, hang onto her. She might be thinking about you just as much man...If she fronts and says she dont want a relationship, dont snap or whine about it, tell her your feelings and leave it at that, you might get to her and she might change her mind, time will tell. Call.

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OfflineSlapnutRob
Toolhead

Registered: 03/31/03
Posts: 520
Loc: Michigan
Last seen: 14 years, 8 months
Re: Completely managed to fuck up a good relationship.... [Re: ]
    #2318495 - 02/09/04 04:07 PM (20 years, 1 month ago)

I've never really thought about it like that, Kottonmouth... maybe I'll give the girl a call tonight...


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Anything stated above is fictional roleplay dialog by the character that is Slapnut Rob, in no way representing the actions or beliefs of the man behind the keys.

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Offlinesykobish
ProfessionalPsycho - JTOKREW
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Registered: 03/15/03
Posts: 17,805
Loc: Toronto, eh?
Last seen: 19 years, 25 days
Re: Completely managed to fuck up a good relationship.... [Re: f8L]
    #2318764 - 02/09/04 05:27 PM (20 years, 1 month ago)

Definitely call her. Being a girl, I can't stand when guys are forward or find the need to pressure me. If they do that, they're gone. I won't be rushed.

I would suggest calling her, telling her how you feel, but also let her know that you don't want her to feel pressured or rushed to do anything. If you really like this girl, give her time. I don't blame her for not wanting to be in a relationship after getting out of one recently.


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I would rather have had one breath of her hair, one kiss from her mouth, one touch of her hand, than eternity without it. One.
-={Nite-Crew}=-

*-_Thread_Jacker_-*
To love is to admire with the heart; to admire is to love with the mind. - Th?ophile Gautier.
Seek not every quality in one individual - Confucius.
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Offlinef8L
Triumph

Registered: 09/07/02
Posts: 397
Last seen: 11 years, 2 days
Re: Completely managed to fuck up a good relationship.... [Re: sykobish]
    #2319557 - 02/09/04 08:44 PM (20 years, 1 month ago)

Thanks for all the advice. I called her today and decided that instead of trying to guess what she was feeling or if she wanted to continue the relationship, or even see me again-- that I would simply invite her to hang out tonight. She told me she would call me after her test got out. The test got out at 6pm and its 10:45, so I don't think she's calling. Although she could have forgotten, I think more likely that she probably does not want to continue the relationship :/ I will have to see if she calls me tomorrow.

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OfflineSlapnutRob
Toolhead

Registered: 03/31/03
Posts: 520
Loc: Michigan
Last seen: 14 years, 8 months
Re: Completely managed to fuck up a good relationship.... [Re: f8L]
    #2320463 - 02/10/04 02:24 AM (20 years, 1 month ago)

I was originally planning on not calling her for a long time, hoping she would get a call of me, but I called the girl I'm interested in tonight.... we're on to hang out tomorrow. Hopefully she has some interest in me and just doesn't want a relationship right now. I'm not sure if I want one right now either... I'm not sure what I want, but for some reason I want her, and it would kill me if someone else had her. Oh well... hopefully I can raise her interest level in me tomorrow.


--------------------
Anything stated above is fictional roleplay dialog by the character that is Slapnut Rob, in no way representing the actions or beliefs of the man behind the keys.

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Offlinesykobish
ProfessionalPsycho - JTOKREW
 User Gallery

Registered: 03/15/03
Posts: 17,805
Loc: Toronto, eh?
Last seen: 19 years, 25 days
Re: Completely managed to fuck up a good relationship.... [Re: f8L]
    #2321881 - 02/10/04 07:55 PM (20 years, 1 month ago)

That sucks. Give it a few days. She may have forgotten. I'd wait a couple days and then maybe give her another call. If it happens again, then I think it's best that you just move on. Sucks that it may not work out for you but keep in mind that everything happens for a reason and this could very well just be opening a door for another opportunity..


--------------------
I would rather have had one breath of her hair, one kiss from her mouth, one touch of her hand, than eternity without it. One.
-={Nite-Crew}=-

*-_Thread_Jacker_-*
To love is to admire with the heart; to admire is to love with the mind. - Th?ophile Gautier.
Seek not every quality in one individual - Confucius.
Global Living Space

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