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OfflineMitchnast
Trial by Madness
Male User Gallery Arcade Champion: Mahjong

Registered: 10/28/99
Posts: 8,572
Loc: Okanagan
Last seen: 5 days, 7 hours
im normal
    #1367037 - 03/11/03 07:42 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

hi evryone. i have a confession to make. im not insane.
i don't doubt my sanity. i hold my integrity in high reguard. im sorry i perhaps misled you all otherwise. the shroomery has been a place for me to think outside the box in a community where others will hear me and i can feel free to say the craziest things.
well from now on you'll get a more sombre and straightforward mitchnast.
last night as i wrote my thoughts, in the thread "desent into madness" and showed off a bit of artwork. my girlfrind showed interest in what i was writing, ive always tried to keep my love life separate from my crazy life. well tonight she left the house crying and drove away because i confronted her about reading my posts after she knew id rather her not read them, using my login, i just assumed she would let it be because i told her it wasnt anything that should matter to her. apparently having anything separate from her doesn't fit her definition of love. for her. evrything you think feel and say or do should be shared willingly and enthusiastically.
i told her i wasnt like that, never have been, and would never be like that. so now shes gone. after 9 months of being together, me not sharing evrything, evry half-finished song, evry oppinion from me peers (here on the shroomery) has finally gotten to her. i hardly mention her on here, it has always been my intention to separete these factors of my life. and not she doesn't trust me. ive never been unfaithful (even a bit, even in thought)
and i can't see how its ever going to go away.
so im abbandoning the crazy life. ill still be here but im merging lives, if she ever comes back then there will be no secrecy, no me, just us. because it drives me crazy to see her go crazy doubting things. i love her very much but i feel its not enough.
i dont want to lose her. i could live without the shroomery, the place where i can say anything and the worst someone might think is that im crazy.
but she is evrything to me.
i really dont know what to say.
i wish she was here but i dont know where she is tonight.
i don't like having to worry this much.


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InvisibleTheHateCamel
Research &Development -DBK
Registered: 01/31/03
Posts: 15,738
Re: im normal [Re: Mitchnast]
    #1367094 - 03/11/03 07:58 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

.


Edited by TheHateCamel (12/05/07 11:17 PM)


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OfflineMitchnast
Trial by Madness
Male User Gallery Arcade Champion: Mahjong

Registered: 10/28/99
Posts: 8,572
Loc: Okanagan
Last seen: 5 days, 7 hours
Re: im normal [Re: TheHateCamel]
    #1367108 - 03/11/03 08:02 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

no she doesnt. she treats me like a king. caters to my evry want and need. i cannot say anything bad about her.
its a good relationship.


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OfflineStrumpling
Neuronaut
Registered: 10/11/02
Posts: 7,571
Loc: Hyperspace
Last seen: 6 years, 4 days
Re: im normal [Re: Mitchnast]
    #1367136 - 03/11/03 08:09 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

Uh-oh.... You're saying you're normal? You're saying you're not insane?

I haven't met a "normal" or "sane" person in my life I don't think - can I have your autograph?


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Insert an "I think" mentally in front of eveything I say that seems sketchy, because I certainly don't KNOW much. Also; feel free to yell at me.
In addition: SHPONGLE


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Offlinejohnnyfive
Burning withCircles!
Registered: 07/02/02
Posts: 886
Loc: Hell
Last seen: 13 years, 11 days
Re: im normal [Re: Mitchnast]
    #1368758 - 03/12/03 10:53 AM (14 years, 2 months ago)

"shroomery has been a place for me to think outside the box in a community where others will hear me and i can feel free to say the craziest things."

Same here man!

Don't worry if people think your crazy, the way i see it we ALL have some kinda of insanity in us! Some are better in covering it up, some are in denial than others. But we all have it!

Sounds easyer than it looks, and i KNOW, what you mean.

As for women, screw that idea, i personally am amazed at the fact that now here in 2003 women now recongnize me. If i was get involved with a women now, it would be desaster! This i KNOW


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And the gameshow host rings the buzzer (brrnnntt) oh and now you get a face full of face!


Edited by johnnyfive (03/12/03 10:56 AM)


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Offlinesoylent_green
The greatEnitsuj
Female

Registered: 12/11/02
Posts: 765
Loc: Ontario
Last seen: 10 years, 3 months
Re: im normal [Re: johnnyfive]
    #1368918 - 03/12/03 11:47 AM (14 years, 2 months ago)

it is normal to be crazy, everyone is crazy....


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What fun is it in Nirvana while other beings are suffering?


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InvisibleTeragon
Noddy

Registered: 02/21/01
Posts: 36,253
Loc: Lost in the Patterns
Re: im normal [Re: Mitchnast]
    #1368982 - 03/12/03 12:07 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

it has always been my intention to separete these factors of my life



Why do you have to keep them separate? Could you not still post on the Shroomery while you're together? Why does it bother you so much that she reads your posts? Integration is a key to life.  :grin: 


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need that cash to feed them jones.


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OfflineLoverofEarth
spirit on ajourney

Registered: 10/09/02
Posts: 206
Loc: the in-between
Last seen: 12 years, 7 months
Re: im normal [Re: Teragon]
    #1369156 - 03/12/03 12:58 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

whatever.. insanity and normalcy are the same thing. what you want is unsanity. embrace it.


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Invisiblechodamunky
Cheers!

Registered: 02/28/02
Posts: 2,030
Loc: sailing the seas of chees...
Re: im normal [Re: Mitchnast]
    #1371552 - 03/13/03 06:44 AM (14 years, 2 months ago)

By standing by your decision that you'd rather be with her than post your thoughts on the shroomery, you are paying for her beliefs with yours. If thats what you want...meh.


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OfflineKilljoy
TheHyperdimensionalSlug

Registered: 01/28/03
Posts: 865
Last seen: 2 years, 8 months
Re: im normal [Re: chodamunky]
    #1377483 - 03/15/03 06:39 AM (14 years, 2 months ago)

Think about those bad feelings you have right now. If a girl ever causes you to worry, and feel less than good about yourself, then fucking GET RID OF HER.

Those BAD feelings don't exist without that girl. And even though it doesn't seem like it to you right now, all the positive things you see in her, are posessed by at LEAST a couple hundred thousand girls on the planet. And I'm sure that at least a few of them wouldn't ever cause you to feel bad EVER for ANY reason. It's called reciprocative caring and respect. People that make you feel bad aren't worth the time, but keeping them distant enough not to cause hurt is a very difficult thing to do.

Don't let people step on you or make you feel bad. You deserve better than that.
We all do.


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Offlineupupup
guardian

Registered: 08/25/01
Posts: 889
Loc: George "I love Hitler" Bu...
Last seen: 13 years, 2 months
Re: im normal [Re: Killjoy]
    #1377501 - 03/15/03 06:57 AM (14 years, 2 months ago)

Those BAD feelings don't exist without that girl.

Would that really be true with reflection? Have you never been depressed outside of a relationship?

Relationships are reflections.
EVERY DAMN ONE OF THEM......

Including here. Use this as a tool for self growth. What is it that is causing this pain? What sort of solid structure have you built within your fluid self that is getting pushed on?

Answer these questions and you will find a gift......give it away...


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Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.


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