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My aunt died..
    #10627523 -

Some of you might remeber the post I made about my aunt having cancer and the surgery to have a tumor removed from her pitutary gland...

Well almost exactly 2 months after she was diagnosed with cancer, she died yesterday morning at 4:30am. July 4th 2009. She was 51 years old.

It was so quick, she was diagnosed May 1st and had surgery the next day. Once they opreated on her they knew something was wrong. BTW my family has strong connections with the Neurological dept of Vanderbilt university where my grandmother and both aunts worked and we knew the head neurosurgeons closely...

Anyways... She died peacefully almost 2 months after she was diagnosed..

She had laid out every single request imaginable for her funeral, will and everything. I mean she literally left nothing to question which is great.

My question is... She requested that me and my brother as well as other friends and family be pallbearers... What do I need to know to be better prepared for this? I'm guessing there are either 6 or 8 people.

Any one that has been through this, can you tell me what it's like?

Thanks


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Same thing happened to me when I played Neil Armstrong in Moonshot. They found me in an alley in Burbank trying to re-enter the earth's atmosphere in an old refrigerator box.

Edited by WakeboardrB (07/06/09 02:19 AM)

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Re: I'm going to be a Pallbearer at my aunt's funeral [Re: WakeboardrB]
    #10627532 -

depends where it takes place, after the funeral you'll probably just load the casket from the funeral home into the hearse waiting at the door.


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"I am the Highest Power the leader of the pack"

Actiavte My Dream Sequence Machine

GOD of the hologram earth

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Re: I'm going to be a Pallbearer at my aunt's funeral [Re: UnholyChild666]
    #10627571 -

Ok, see I have no idea. Last funeral I was at was my grandmothers (her moms) about 6 years ago. I just kinda want some reassurance so I don't break down while I'm doing it.

Thanks.

It's so amazing how in the very short time she had to plan, she thought of everything.


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Same thing happened to me when I played Neil Armstrong in Moonshot. They found me in an alley in Burbank trying to re-enter the earth's atmosphere in an old refrigerator box.

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Re: I'm going to be a Pallbearer at my aunt's funeral [Re: WakeboardrB]
    #10627580 -

they'll have enough other people carrying it that you don't have to worry about dropping it or anything most likely 3 on each side


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"I am the Highest Power the leader of the pack"

Actiavte My Dream Sequence Machine

GOD of the hologram earth

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Re: I'm going to be a Pallbearer at my aunt's funeral [Re: UnholyChild666]
    #10627655 -

It's so weird that my main concern is how heavy the casket is.

Her wish was to have a family reunion on the 4th, but she died at 4:30am on the 4th. She was with her brother and sister and her son when she passed, but she was pretty much unconscious the whole day.

When she woke up when I was there she saw me and said how glad she was I was here, which means the world to me. But I honestly wish I didn't see her like that. She was bald and pale, like a shell of a human being.

My dad and I saw her just over a month ago right after she had surgery to remove the tumor from her pituitary gland and she looked fucking great. Except one eyelid was closed, I guess because of the surgery. She was full of life and moving around like crazy. We went out to Red Robin to eat some burgers and she loved it.

It's so fucking crazy how fast the cancer had progressed. She had dozens of tumors all over her body that grew so fast they couldn't do anything about it.

I'm glad she saw me before she died, but I wish I wouldn't have seen how bad off she looked. I would rather remember her how she looked when we went to Red Robin. She took pictures of us on her camera so I'm going to get a copy of the pics so I can try to forget how she looked in her last 12 hours of life.

Fuck this is weird.


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Same thing happened to me when I played Neil Armstrong in Moonshot. They found me in an alley in Burbank trying to re-enter the earth's atmosphere in an old refrigerator box.

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Re: I'm going to be a Pallbearer at my aunt's funeral [Re: WakeboardrB]
    #10627674 -

Yeah my grandma had cancer by the time she in the Hospice she so full of drugs and the cancer had progressed so much she just made moans and really weird comments to no one in general.  Like she mumbled "mine's bigger" once don't know what she was talking about.  I don't think she even really knew we were there.  It was really uncomfortable for me.


--------------------



"I am the Highest Power the leader of the pack"

Actiavte My Dream Sequence Machine

GOD of the hologram earth

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Re: I'm going to be a Pallbearer at my aunt's funeral [Re: UnholyChild666]
    #10627779 -

Apparently in the last few days she was so thirsty and constantly asking for water. She named he water bottles 'Shirley' and kept asking for chocolate milk. After she drank a glass of milk she would ask for one more. And one more and another and another.

I really gained an insight into what the final days of a human life are. Thank god her sister is a nurse. She basically took over hospice care for her in the last few days.

Once they broke open the comfort pack (morphine, ativan and scopolamine to quell the death rattle) I knew it was her final hours. They all sat in the room with her for about 12 hours and talked and reminiced, although she was pretty much unconcious through the whole time. At the end they gave her liqud morphine multiple times, maybe to speed it up a bit, but I don't know.

It's strange but after she died I saw a sense of relief in both my dad and her sister. The hours before her sister was a total wreck and she was saying how it was killing her to see her like that. After it was all over with and they all got some sleep I definitely saw that most of their stress had passed.

I'm just glad she's no longer in pain.

The funeral is going to be a bitch though. I'm not good at showing emotion (like my dad). It's gonna be a real challenge.

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