Auto-SummaryThis forum post is a nostalgic reflection on the author's past, intertwined with themes of youth, hope, and the passage of time. The writer shares their admiration for Samuel Taylor Coleridge's works, particularly "Youth and age" and "suicide's argument." The post explores the author's longing for the carefree days of their youth, when they were "one with YOUTH." They reminisce about nature, love, and friendship, which they believe were more vibrant in their younger years. The tone is melancholic, as the author grapples with the realization that these youthful experiences are now gone. The post also delves into the author's family history and personal relationships, revealing a deep connection to their ancestors and a longing for the presence of a family member. Overall, the post is a poignant exploration of memory, identity, and the bittersweet nature of aging.
Its weird yesterday I stumbled onto some Samuel Taylor Coleridge online and was really digging some of his short works. I don't ussualy like old romantic stuff at all.
"Youth and age"
Verse, a Breeze 'mid blossoms straying, Where HOPE clung feeding, like a bee-- Both were mine ! Life went a-maying With NATURE, HOPE, and POESY, When I was young ! When I was young ?--Ah, woful WHEN ! Ah ! for the Change 'twixt Now and Then ! This breathing House not built with hands, This body that does me grievous wrong, O'er æry Cliffs and glittering Sands, How lightly then it flashed along :-- Like those trim skiffs, unknown of yore, On winding lakes and rivers wide, That ask no aid of Sail or Oar, That fear no spite of Wind or Tide ! Nought cared this Body for wind or weather When YOUTH and I lived in't together.
FLOWERS are lovely ; LOVE is flower-like ; FRIENDSHIP is a sheltering tree ; O ! the Joys, that came down shower-like, Of FRIENDSHIP, LOVE, and LIBERTY, Ere I was old ! Ere I was old ? Ah woful ERE, Which tells me, YOUTH'S no longer here ! O YOUTH ! for years so many and sweet, 'Tis known, that Thou and I were one, I'll think it but a fond conceit-- It cannot be that Thou art gone ! Thy Vesper-bell hath not yet toll'd :-- And thou wert aye a Masker bold ! What strange Disguise hast now put on, To make believe, that thou art gone ? I see these Locks in silvery slips, This drooping Gait, this altered Size : But SPRINGTIDE blossoms on thy Lips, And Tears take sunshine from thine eyes ! Life is but Thought : so think I will That YOUTH and I are House-mates still.
Dew-drops are the gems of morning, But the tears of mournful eve ! Where no hope is, life's a warning That only serves to make us grieve, When we are old : That only serves to make us grieve With oft and tedious taking-leave, Like some poor nigh-related guest, That may not rudely be dismist ; Yet hath outstay'd his welcome while, And tells the jest without the smile.
"suicide's arguement"
Ere the birth of my life, if I wished it or no No question was asked me--it could not be so ! If the life was the question, a thing sent to try And to live on be YES; what can NO be ? to die. NATURE'S ANSWER Is't returned, as 'twas sent ? Is't no worse for the wear ? Think first, what you ARE ! Call to mind what you WERE ! I gave you innocence, I gave you hope, Gave health, and genius, and an ample scope, Return you me guilt, lethargy, despair ? Make out the invent'ry ; inspect, compare ! Then die--if die you dare !
"and work without hope"
All Nature seems at work. Slugs leave their lair-- The bees are stirring--birds are on the wing-- And WINTER slumbering in the open air, Wears on his smiling face a dream of Spring ! And I, the while, the sole unbusy thing, Nor honey make, nor pair, nor build, nor sing. Yet well I ken the banks where Amaranths blow, Have traced the fount whence streams of nectar flow. Bloom, O ye Amaranths ! bloom for whom ye may, For me ye bloom not ! Glide, rich streams, away ! With lips unbrightened, wreathless brow, I stroll : And would you learn the spells that drowse my soul ? WORK WITHOUT HOPE draws nectar in a sieve, And HOPE without an object cannot live.
I always dug Etheredge Knight
Here is "feeling fucked up"
Lord she's gone done left me done packed / up and split and I with no way to make her come back and everywhere the world is bare bright bone white crystal sand glistens dope death dead dying and jiving drove her away made her take her laughter and her smiles and her softness and her midnight sighs--
Fuck Coltrane and music and clouds drifting in the sky fuck the sea and trees and the sky and birds and alligators and all the animals that roam the earth fuck marx and mao fuck fidel and nkrumah and democracy and communism fuck smack and pot and red ripe tomatoes fuck joseph fuck mary fuck god jesus and all the disciples fuck fanon nixon and malcom fuck the revolution fuck freedom fuck the whole muthafucking thing all i want now is my woman back so my soul can sing
here is "Idea on ancestry"
1
Taped to the wall of my cell are 47 pictures: 47 black
faces: my father, mother, grandmothers (1 dead), grand-
fathers (both dead), brothers, sisters, uncles, aunts,
cousins (1st and 2nd), nieces, and nephews. They stare
across the space at me sprawling on my bunk. I know
their dark eyes, they know mine. I know their style,
they know mine. I am all of them, they are all of me;
they are farmers, I am a thief, I am me, they are thee.
I have at one time or another been in love with my mother,
1 grandmother, 2 sisters, 2 aunts (1 went to the asylum),
and 5 cousins. I am now in love with a 7-yr-old niece
(she sends me letters in large block print, and
her picture is the only one that smiles at me).
I have the same name as 1 grandfather, 3 cousins, 3 nephews,
and 1 uncle. The uncle disappeared when he was 15, just took
off and caught a freight (they say). He's discussed each year
when the family has a reunion, he causes uneasiness in
the clan, he is an empty space. My father's mother, who is 93
and who keeps the Family Bible with everbody's birth dates
(and death dates) in it, always mentions him. There is no
place in her Bible for "whereabouts unknown."
2
Each fall the graves of my grandfathers call me, the brown
hills and red gullies of mississippi send out their electric
messages, galvanizing my genes. Last yr/like a salmon quitting
the cold ocean-leaping and bucking up his birth stream/I
hitchhiked my way from LA with 16 caps in my pocket and a
monkey on my back. And I almost kicked it with the kinfolks.
I walked barefooted in my grandmother's backyard/I smelled the
old
land and the woods/I sipped cornwhiskey from fruit jars with the
men/
I flirted with the women/I had a ball till the caps ran out
and my habit came down. That night I looked at my grandmother
and split/my guts were screaming for junk/but I was almost
contented/I had almost caught up with me.
(The next day in Memphis I cracked a croaker's crib for a fix.)
This yr there is a gray stone wall damming my stream, and when
the falling leaves stir my genes, I pace my cell or flop on my bunk
and stare at 47 black faces across the space. I am all of them,
they are all of me, I am me, they are thee, and I have no children
to float in the space between.
-------------------- "And we, inhabitants of the great coral of the Cosmos, believe the atom (which still we cannot see) to be full matter, whereas, it too, like everything else, is but an embroidery of voids in the Void, and we give the name of being, dense and even eternal, to that dance of inconsistencies, that infinite extension that is identified with absolute Nothingness and that spins from its own non-being the illusion of everything."
Edited by DirtMcgirt (04/29/08 11:43 PM)
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