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Chuck Norris Facts
    #8332530 -

:lol:  Let's hear em!

If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.

There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.

Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.

Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.

Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay's potato chip.

Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.

Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

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Re: Chuck Norris Facts [Re: Newbie]
    #8332535 -

Nice, I haven't heard any of those.


--------------------
The Prophecy!

Learn To Code

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Re: Chuck Norris Facts [Re: Newbie]
    #8332539 -

chuck norris does roundhouse kicks alot (i'm not playing :smile: )


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ca'rouse (k-rouz)
intr.v.
To engage in boisterous, drunken merrymaking.

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Re: Chuck Norris Facts [Re: TODAY]
    #8332556 -

Chuck Norris once walked down the street without pants, there were no survivors.


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"To do right is to know what you want. Now when you are dissatisfied with yourself it's because you are after something you don't really want. What objects are you proposing to yourself? Are they the objects you really value? If they are not, you are cheating yourself. I don't meant that if you chose to pursue the objects you most value, you will attain them; of course not. Your experience will tell you that. But success in getting after much labor what you really don't care for is the bitterest and most ridiculous failure." -George Santayana

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Re: Chuck Norris Facts [Re: Newbie]
    #8332590 -

NewbieShroomie said:
Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.


:lol:


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Every mistake, intentional or otherwise, in the above post, is the fault of the reader.

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Re: Chuck Norris Facts [Re: Nephlyte]
    #8332606 -

93
Not mine: "When Chuck Norris does push-ups, he does'nt push himself up, he pushes the Earth down!"
Mine: The bows on the bow-flex machines are actually the pubes of Chuck Norris which have been stretched.
93 93/93


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Re: Chuck Norris Facts [Re: Nephlyte]
    #8332613 -

outerspace exists because its afraid to be on the same planet with chuck norris.....ZING!

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Re: Chuck Norris Facts [Re: kurosaki]
    #8332629 -

:lol:

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Re: Chuck Norris Facts [Re: kurosaki]
    #8332644 -

Chuck Norris knows everything there is to know - Except for the definition of mercy.

Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi.


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I am a faker. Pretending along.

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Re: Chuck Norris Facts [Re: Newbie]
    #8332651 -

chuck norris is so manly that he clogs the toillet...
























































when he pisses



peace out Dm


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"Comes a time when the blind man takes your hand says: don't you see? Gotta make it some how, on the dreams you still believe, Don't give it up, you've got an empty cup, only love can fill, only love can fill" < Grateful Dead!

The bus came by and I got on, and thats when it all began

GROWLIGHT KIT, 250w HPS Digital ballast, + Enhanced Spectrum bulb and Reflector Sale Or Trade!
     

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Re: Chuck Norris Facts [Re: dutchmushroom]
    #8332706 -

chuck norris could beat a brick wall in tennis


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Re: Chuck Norris Facts [Re: dutchmushroom]
    #8332715 -

chuck norris only loses to one thing....nothing

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Re: Chuck Norris Facts [Re: milkman]
    #8332742 -

Our founding fathers originally decreed a strict separation between Chuck Norris and state. Chuck Norris eliminated them.


--------------------
The Prophecy!

Learn To Code

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Re: Chuck Norris Facts [Re: blewmeanie]
    #8332820 -

Chuck Norris is such a badass he has to be weighed on the Richter Scale


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"This day is a lover..."

~Rumi

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Re: Chuck Norris Facts [Re: Nunbuh_Chrubble]
    #8332855 -

Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting, because with hunting there is an implied chance of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

While I enjoy these jokes, I don't think much of ole Charles. Mike Huckabee? Wtf?


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No statements made in any post or message by myself should be construed to mean that I am now, or have ever been, participating in or considering participation in any activities in violation of any local, state, federal, or fashion police laws. All posts are works of fiction.

For well you know that its a fool who plays it cool
By making his world a little colder.

Under closer inspection I realised it was a funky ball of tits from outer space.


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Re: Chuck Norris Facts [Re: Newbie]
    #8332859 -

Chuck Norris is a douchebag.


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https://www.gofundme.com/f/support-for-renee-goods-wife-and-son

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Re: Chuck Norris Facts [Re: Baby_Hitler]
    #8332869 -



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No statements made in any post or message by myself should be construed to mean that I am now, or have ever been, participating in or considering participation in any activities in violation of any local, state, federal, or fashion police laws. All posts are works of fiction.

For well you know that its a fool who plays it cool
By making his world a little colder.

Under closer inspection I realised it was a funky ball of tits from outer space.


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Re: Chuck Norris Facts [Re: Baby_Hitler]
    #8332872 -

I agree, but the jokes are funny as hell.

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Re: Chuck Norris Facts [Re: Newbie]
    #8332948 -

Yeah a friend of mine is related to him, and says he is a dick to pretty much everyone.


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The Prophecy!

Learn To Code

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Re: Chuck Norris Facts [Re: blewmeanie]
    #8333006 -

Not Mine: Chuck Norris round-house kicked his way out of his mothers womb

Not Mine: Chuck Norris isnt afraid of the dark, the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.


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I told Althea that treachery was tearing me limb from limb
Althea told me cool down boy, settle back, easy Jim

Forever Grateful

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