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OfflineTangerines
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Cannot seem to have a conversation with girls
    #4610062 - 09/01/05 07:47 PM (18 years, 6 months ago)

I dunno why but whenever some girl says hi to me I just grunt hey to them and I can never think of anything to say. Maybe I am thinking to fast and just need to slow done and relax. I can't seem to do this though even though I know I want to. Conversations are always one-sided because the only thing I can think of saying is 'ya' or 'alright' or something like that. I am not a very sociable person but when I do talk it usually has a purpose. I am not one to talk just for the sake of talking. I just do not like small talk I guess. So unless some girl asks me what I think about our existance or something I just don't have anything much to say.

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Offlinederyl
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Registered: 10/21/04
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Re: Cannot seem to have a conversation with girls [Re: Tangerines]
    #4610071 - 09/01/05 07:50 PM (18 years, 6 months ago)

*social lubrication*

read:alcohol

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InvisibleDNKYD
Turtle!

Registered: 09/23/04
Posts: 12,326
Re: Cannot seem to have a conversation with girls [Re: Tangerines]
    #4610072 - 09/01/05 07:50 PM (18 years, 6 months ago)

You've got to find something you both can talk about. Anything you both have in common can spawn all sorts of convos. It takes some getting used to though. It won't happen over night. It's a skill that needs to be learned/mastered just like anything else.

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Invisibledr_gonz
Registered: 08/18/03
Posts: 44,654
. [Re: Tangerines]
    #4610081 - 09/01/05 07:53 PM (18 years, 6 months ago)

.

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OfflineLuNaTiX
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Re: Cannot seem to have a conversation with girls [Re: Tangerines]
    #4610085 - 09/01/05 07:55 PM (18 years, 6 months ago)

gatta open your mind, ask questions, if your interested in her, proove it.


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OfflineTangerines
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Re: Cannot seem to have a conversation with girls [Re: dr_gonz]
    #4610087 - 09/01/05 07:56 PM (18 years, 6 months ago)

Well thanks for the help... I am not exactly above the drinking age so going to bars will not due though alcohol is readily available.

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Offlinederyl
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Re: Cannot seem to have a conversation with girls [Re: Tangerines]
    #4610104 - 09/01/05 08:01 PM (18 years, 6 months ago)

im not of legal age either, but that hasn't stopped me from buying beer since i was 15.

Next time youre at a keg party, sit down right next to the keg, talk to everyone that comes by (most will be friendly becuase theyre drinking anyway). In the course of the night, you'll easily talk to every girl that is at the party and drinking, even if its just a hello.

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Invisibledemiu5
humans, lol
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Re: Cannot seem to have a conversation with girls [Re: Tangerines]
    #4610105 - 09/01/05 08:02 PM (18 years, 6 months ago)

date drug girls/hippie girls...I'm guessing if you're on this board then the two of you might have somethings in common and interesting life views to talk about.


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channel your inner Larry David

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OfflineLearyfanS
It's the psychedelic movement!
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Registered: 04/20/01
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Re: Cannot seem to have a conversation with girls [Re: Tangerines]
    #4610108 - 09/01/05 08:04 PM (18 years, 6 months ago)

It's good that you're thinking about the over all picture of life. You've got your mind thinking about ultimate reality. It's good that you're trying to decide what life is about before you go about living your life. You just need to learn to balance that thought along with the thought that you need in order to have pleasure in the physical world.

If you're out of high school, I recommend trying ecstasy. If you're still in high school, then you shouldn't be doing drugs at all.







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--------------------------------


Mp3 of the month:  Sons Of Adam - Feathered Fish


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Offlineaig
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Registered: 10/31/04
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Re: Cannot seem to have a conversation with girls [Re: Learyfan]
    #4610120 - 09/01/05 08:10 PM (18 years, 6 months ago)

practice makes perfect....so basically start with ugly chicks


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The things you own end up owning you.

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InvisibleHeavyToilet
The Heaviest OfThem All
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Posts: 9,458
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Re: Cannot seem to have a conversation with girls [Re: Tangerines]
    #4610130 - 09/01/05 08:14 PM (18 years, 6 months ago)

When a girl is talking to you try to relate what she's saying to an accomplishment, or a hobby, or a good quality that you have. Or even an interesting or funny story that happened to you. Then just bring it up... just so it doesn't look off topic and weird.

Or pretty much anything of interest that is related to the conversation.

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OfflineTangerines
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Re: Cannot seem to have a conversation with girls [Re: aig]
    #4610134 - 09/01/05 08:16 PM (18 years, 6 months ago)

Drugs so far have no impacted me at all in high school. So that is no problem. I think the problem is I over think things. And there are few hippie/drug chicks as you call the mat my school. The majority of kids are so cool they are gangsters and the rest are jocks/preps. I hate using labels but that is the best way to describe it.

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InvisibleWoodsCall
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Registered: 12/06/04
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Re: Cannot seem to have a conversation with girls [Re: Tangerines]
    #4610146 - 09/01/05 08:18 PM (18 years, 6 months ago)

Embrace that you are who you are.  I'm very introverted and there's nothing wrong with not enjoying small talk!!  Most of the time I find it extremely boring, even if it is with a guy I like. 
If I cannot connect with them through a GOOD quality conversation, I usually move on.  Some people think I'm rude because I don't say HI all the time or when someone asks how I'm doing, I'll just say something short and simple like you do.  I tell them I'm not social, but it's their fault for not realizing that people are different.  Just cuz I don't have much to say, doesn't mean I'm blowing you off.

Don't worry about the girls...

If you're confident enough about yourself and understand what you want from friendships and relationships, then it'll be that much easier to find a woman who will appreciate you for who you are!


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Live free or die.

Edited by WoodsCall (12/27/10 12:11 PM)

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OfflineTangerines
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Re: Cannot seem to have a conversation with girls [Re: Tangerines]
    #4610148 - 09/01/05 08:20 PM (18 years, 6 months ago)

HeavyToilet, the thing is I usually cannot come up with a funny story or anything. One time someone asked me to tell a funny story that happened in my life and I just sat there silent. I think it is probably just because I am self-consious. I never used to be but since high school I just think waaaay too much about what people think of me even though I know how ridiculus most kids are these days and superficial. I just need to get the attitude that I don't care what people think about me.

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Offlinederyl
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Registered: 10/21/04
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Re: Cannot seem to have a conversation with girls [Re: Tangerines]
    #4610150 - 09/01/05 08:20 PM (18 years, 6 months ago)

thats why i quit smoking man, everytime i'd get really high i'd start to psycho analyze myself and everything around me, and as cool as that may sound, it wasn't.

I'd just get pissed off about how stupid the people i was with were acting or little things like that, it was really stressful.

I like the booze alot more :beer:

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InvisibleWoodsCall
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Re: Cannot seem to have a conversation with girls [Re: Tangerines]
    #4610151 - 09/01/05 08:20 PM (18 years, 6 months ago)

Oh and I think I had only one "boyfriend" in high school.  The world opens up when you step out of that prison :smile:


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Live free or die.

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OfflineTangerines
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Re: Cannot seem to have a conversation with girls [Re: WoodsCall]
    #4610161 - 09/01/05 08:25 PM (18 years, 6 months ago)

Yea I really think I am ready to move on from high school. I mean everyday I just see how fake everyone is and its a sickening feeling. People just move along bobbing their heads blindly. Deryl man that has been hapening to me lately. When I get high I just 'notice' to much I think. FOr example I will notice that a friend has a habit of putting his hand in his pocket and playing with keys and just dumb shit like that. Its stuff I dont want to know but it just pops up in my head. I Think I am more of the observant type and just like to observe rather than participate.

In the end I am sure shit will work out I just need to give it time. And most of all be myself.

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InvisibleHeavyToilet
The Heaviest OfThem All
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Registered: 08/06/03
Posts: 9,458
Loc: British Columbia
Re: Cannot seem to have a conversation with girls [Re: Tangerines]
    #4610162 - 09/01/05 08:25 PM (18 years, 6 months ago)

Maybe try and think about what you could talk about before getting into a conversation. Improvising a conversation can be difficult sometimes.

Ask yourself these questions:

What are your hobbies?
What are your interests?
What are your goals?
What has happened to you that is completely off the hook?

You can make up questions like this fairly easily, then just figure some shit out.

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OfflineTangerines
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Re: Cannot seem to have a conversation with girls [Re: HeavyToilet]
    #4610165 - 09/01/05 08:26 PM (18 years, 6 months ago)

OYu bring up a good point HeavyToilet. Even though it seems extremly weird to lay out a conversation it sounds like it would work haha.

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InvisibleSkunk420
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Re: Cannot seem to have a conversation with girls [Re: Tangerines]
    #4610176 - 09/01/05 08:30 PM (18 years, 6 months ago)

I hate trying to talk with any one I dont know very well, but I manage..I used to be so shy and dead quiet. honestly if I can type you know I can talk...yes I do, i am a post whore, in fact I have have several warning about being a post whore in the past in zee pub..damn it I really am quiet sometimes really..

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