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OfflineMagicalMystery
turn off yourmind

Registered: 07/27/05
Posts: 1,740
Loc: Here, there and everywher...
Last seen: 11 years, 9 months
A joke 4 u 2 laff at ! ROFL
    #4498447 - 08/05/05 03:26 AM (12 years, 20 days ago)

Two men camping in the mountains had spent four days together, and they were getting a little testy. One morning, the first friend says, "You know, we're starting to get on each other's nerves. Why don't we split up today. I'll hike north and spend the day looking around, you hike south and spend the day. Then tonight, we'll have dinner and share our experiences over the campfire." The second friend agrees and hikes south. The first man hikes north. That night over dinner, the first man tells his story. "Today I hiked into a beautiful valley. I followed a stream up into a canyon and ate lunch. Then I swam in a crystal clear mountain lake. As I sat out and dried, I watched deer come and drink from the stream. The wildflowers were filled with butterflies and hawks floated all day overhead. How was your day?" The second friend says, "I went south and ran across a set of railroad tracks. I followed them until I came across a beautiful young woman tied to the tracks. I cut the ropes off, gently lifted her off the tracks, and we had sex in every imaginable way all afternoon. Finally, when I was so tired I could barely move, I came back to camp." "Wow!!" the first guy exclaimed, "Your day was MUCH better than mine. Did you get a blow job, too?" "Nah," says the second friend over his meal, "I couldn't find her head."


--------------------

"Men trained in arms from their infancy, and animated by the love of liberty, will afford neither a cheap or easy conquest."
From the Declaration of the Continental Congress

"We can have peace and security only as long as we band together to preserve that most priceless possession, our inheritance of European blood."
Charles A. Lindbergh,"Aviation, Geography, and Race", Reader's Digest, Nov. 1939

"We must secure the existance of our people and a future for White children."
David Lane


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InvisibleMushmanTheManic
Stranger

Registered: 04/21/05
Posts: 4,587
Re: A joke 4 u 2 laff at ! ROFL [Re: MagicalMystery]
    #4498450 - 08/05/05 03:27 AM (12 years, 20 days ago)

Hahaha


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PsyPost - Psychedelic Research


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Offlinefreddurgan
Techgnostic
Male

Registered: 01/11/04
Posts: 3,648
Last seen: 5 years, 2 months
Re: A joke 4 u 2 laff at ! ROFL [Re: MagicalMystery]
    #4498455 - 08/05/05 03:27 AM (12 years, 20 days ago)

haha

that's fucked


--------------------
Ishmael
http://www.ishmael.org

Ron Paul 2008!
http://www.ronpaul2008.com/


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Offlineilikebigbuds21
American Youth<3

Registered: 03/20/05
Posts: 776
Last seen: 10 years, 9 months
Re: A joke 4 u 2 laff at ! ROFL [Re: MagicalMystery]
    #4498459 - 08/05/05 03:28 AM (12 years, 20 days ago)

Hah you said testy


--------------------
I don't think
I just drink

Cowgold said:
Blacks don't eat mushrooms. You can't be black. It's impossible.


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InvisibleCaptainH13
Scum
 User Gallery

Registered: 10/29/04
Posts: 10,287
Re: A joke 4 u 2 laff at ! ROFL [Re: freddurgan]
    #4498476 - 08/05/05 03:29 AM (12 years, 20 days ago)

that's fucking AWESOME!!...

:rolf2:

:zombie:


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Offlinelilbilski4life
fear andloathing inbozeman

Registered: 03/18/05
Posts: 199
Last seen: 10 years, 4 months
Re: A joke 4 u 2 laff at ! ROFL [Re: CaptainH13]
    #4498535 - 08/05/05 03:39 AM (12 years, 20 days ago)

rofl taht is good one.


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Offlinehaunted
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Registered: 03/16/04
Posts: 445
Loc: Wellington
Last seen: 2 years, 2 months
Re: A joke 4 u 2 laff at ! ROFL [Re: CaptainH13]
    #4498546 - 08/05/05 03:40 AM (12 years, 20 days ago)

fuckin sick man, i didn't even see it coming!


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InvisibleBurke Dennings

Registered: 11/29/04
Posts: 78,487
Re: A joke 4 u 2 laff at ! ROFL [Re: haunted]
    #4498562 - 08/05/05 03:45 AM (12 years, 20 days ago)

Very nice!  :lol:


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OfflineJadian
Ninja
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Registered: 07/07/05
Posts: 7,404
Loc: The desert
Last seen: 1 month, 1 day
Re: A joke 4 u 2 laff at ! ROFL [Re: haunted]
    #4498567 - 08/05/05 03:46 AM (12 years, 20 days ago)

I got one, not as dirty though.

FBI agents conducted a raid of a psychiatric hospital in San Diego that was under investigation for medical insurance fraud. After hours of reviewing thousands of medical records, the dozens of agents had worked up quite an appetite.

The agent in charge of the investigation called a nearby pizza parlor with delivery service to order a quick dinner for his colleagues. The following telephone conversation took place and was recorded by the FBI because they were taping all conversations at the hospital.

Agent: Hello. I'd like to order 19 large pizzas and 3 cases of soda.

Pizza Man: And where would you like them delivered?

Agent: We're over at the psychiatric hospital.

Pizza Man: The psychiatric hospital?

Agent: That's right. I'm an FBI agent.

Pizza Man: You're an FBI agent?

Agent: That's correct. Just about everybody here is.

Pizza Man: And you're at the psychiatric hospital?

Agent: That's correct. And make sure you don't go through the front doors. We have them locked. You'll have to go around to the back service entrance to deliver the pizzas.

Pizza Man: And you say you're all FBI agents?

Agent: That's right. How soon can you have them here?

Pizza Man: Everyone at the psychiatric hospital is an FBI agent?

Agent: That's right. We've been here all day and we're starving.

Pizza Man: How are you going to pay for all of this?

Agent: We've collected a pool of cash.

Pizza Man: And you're all FBI agents?

Agent: Yes.

Pizza Man: With guns?

Agent: That's right. Now, can you remember to bring the pizzas and sodas to the service entrance in the rear? We have the front doors locked.

Pizza Man: No fuckin' way.

*Click*


--------------------
LNC's official Alaskan stoner
:jackdaniels::drooling::jackdaniels:


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Offlinefreddurgan
Techgnostic
Male

Registered: 01/11/04
Posts: 3,648
Last seen: 5 years, 2 months
Re: A joke 4 u 2 laff at ! ROFL [Re: Jadian]
    #4498580 - 08/05/05 03:49 AM (12 years, 20 days ago)

Ha. Problem with that joke is that you have to believe the FBI agents are dumb enough to not explain at all.

Like most characters in TV shows that don't explain ANYTHING so that the drama can happen, when it easily could have been avoided with 6 seconds of details.


--------------------
Ishmael
http://www.ishmael.org

Ron Paul 2008!
http://www.ronpaul2008.com/


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OfflineMagicalMystery
turn off yourmind

Registered: 07/27/05
Posts: 1,740
Loc: Here, there and everywher...
Last seen: 11 years, 9 months
Re: A joke 4 u 2 laff at ! ROFL [Re: freddurgan]
    #4498586 - 08/05/05 03:49 AM (12 years, 20 days ago)

Yea, I'dd say that at the "with guns" question, the fibbie would explain.

Fuckin Buncha Idiots


--------------------

"Men trained in arms from their infancy, and animated by the love of liberty, will afford neither a cheap or easy conquest."
From the Declaration of the Continental Congress

"We can have peace and security only as long as we band together to preserve that most priceless possession, our inheritance of European blood."
Charles A. Lindbergh,"Aviation, Geography, and Race", Reader's Digest, Nov. 1939

"We must secure the existance of our people and a future for White children."
David Lane


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OfflineJadian
Ninja
Male User Gallery

Registered: 07/07/05
Posts: 7,404
Loc: The desert
Last seen: 1 month, 1 day
Re: A joke 4 u 2 laff at ! ROFL [Re: MagicalMystery] * 1
    #4498620 - 08/05/05 03:59 AM (12 years, 20 days ago)

Sheesh, I didn't know you guys would be so damn critical of the FBI agents, alright try this one out.

4 college students go get wasted one night and accidently sleep through their final. They go to the teacher the next day and give him a big story about how they had a flat tire in the next county over and couldn't make it back in time for the test. The teacher is really nice about it, and 2 days later the students come back for their make up test. The teacher puts them in 4 sperate rooms and hands out the test. Here's what it looked like.



Question 1 (two points) - Name
Question 2 (ninety-eight points) - Which tire?


--------------------
LNC's official Alaskan stoner
:jackdaniels::drooling::jackdaniels:


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OfflineMagicalMystery
turn off yourmind

Registered: 07/27/05
Posts: 1,740
Loc: Here, there and everywher...
Last seen: 11 years, 9 months
Re: A joke 4 u 2 laff at ! ROFL [Re: Jadian]
    #4498654 - 08/05/05 04:08 AM (12 years, 20 days ago)

hahaha


--------------------

"Men trained in arms from their infancy, and animated by the love of liberty, will afford neither a cheap or easy conquest."
From the Declaration of the Continental Congress

"We can have peace and security only as long as we band together to preserve that most priceless possession, our inheritance of European blood."
Charles A. Lindbergh,"Aviation, Geography, and Race", Reader's Digest, Nov. 1939

"We must secure the existance of our people and a future for White children."
David Lane


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Offlinefreddurgan
Techgnostic
Male

Registered: 01/11/04
Posts: 3,648
Last seen: 5 years, 2 months
Re: A joke 4 u 2 laff at ! ROFL [Re: Jadian]
    #4498672 - 08/05/05 04:12 AM (12 years, 20 days ago)

Quote:

Jadian said:
Sheesh, I didn't know you guys would be so damn critical of the FBI agents, alright try this one out.

4 college students go get wasted one night and accidently sleep through their final. They go to the teacher the next day and give him a big story about how they had a flat tire in the next county over and couldn't make it back in time for the test. The teacher is really nice about it, and 2 days later the students come back for their make up test. The teacher puts them in 4 sperate rooms and hands out the test. Here's what it looked like.



Question 1 (two points) - Name
Question 2 (ninety-eight points) - Which tire?




Now that is fucking classic. 4 stars.


--------------------
Ishmael
http://www.ishmael.org

Ron Paul 2008!
http://www.ronpaul2008.com/


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InvisibleCowgold
Bullshit

Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 04/04/05
Posts: 12,486
Loc: .
Re: A joke 4 u 2 laff at ! ROFL [Re: freddurgan]
    #4499042 - 08/05/05 09:43 AM (12 years, 19 days ago)

An old man glances at his BBQ grill and then over at his wife's ass (bent over in the flower garden) and says, "Honey I think your ass is bigger than this here BBQ grill." He goes inside and after a few minutes returns with a measuring tape. He measures the grill and then measures his wife's ass. "Honey, your ass is bigger than my BBQ grill!"
Later that night...
He makes a move on his wife and she quickly pulls away, "Now what's this all about honey?" His wife answers, "You must be crazy if you think I'm gonna fire up this big old grill for that lil weenie!"


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"You might not be aware of this, but there are a lot of dickheads on the Internet." - D. Wong


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