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OfflineTasty_Smurf_House
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Scared of being in cars.
    #3772472 - 02/13/05 01:17 AM (11 years, 9 months ago)

Was in a car crash last summer. Since then I've been often scared, sometimes extremely scared, while being in a vehicle. I can't stand it. It seems like everytime we turn I'm gonna get hit by a car or something. Sometimes when in a vehicle I'm like oh shit I'm gonna die :frown:


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InvisibleWorld Spirit
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Re: Scared of being in cars. [Re: Tasty_Smurf_House]
    #3772585 - 02/13/05 01:55 AM (11 years, 9 months ago)

After enough successful drives here and there you will soon have enough confidence rebuilt to replace the negative association. Just give things time and you'll be fine before you know it.


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InvisibleLe_Canard
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Registered: 05/17/03
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Re: Scared of being in cars. [Re: World Spirit]
    #3772711 - 02/13/05 02:34 AM (11 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

Enter said:
Just give things time and you'll be fine before you know it.




Yes, I think you can get over it this way too. And it's certainly not an unreasonable phobia, given your circumstances...


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InvisibleSHiZNO
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Re: Scared of being in cars. [Re: Le_Canard]
    #3772881 - 02/13/05 03:47 AM (11 years, 9 months ago)

you have to get back on the horse, or in the car...heh


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OfflineTasty_Smurf_House
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Re: Scared of being in cars. [Re: SHiZNO]
    #3772943 - 02/13/05 04:15 AM (11 years, 9 months ago)

yeah, i have been back in the car. but i still don't like it. and since the accident i've had a lot of dreams where i die or am about to die or am dying. several cases involved vehicles and it's stressful.


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InvisibleSHiZNO
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Re: Scared of being in cars. [Re: Tasty_Smurf_House]
    #3772949 - 02/13/05 04:18 AM (11 years, 9 months ago)

how bad was the crash? ive been in a pretty bad highway/motorway crash before but i wasnt nervous about getting in a car, actually instead of going to the hospital like i was told to i got in another car to get to the store i was going to heh....shouldve probably gone tho since now my lower back is kind of fucked up and i always assume thats why

but anyway...how bad?


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InvisiblesuiM
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Re: Scared of being in cars. [Re: Tasty_Smurf_House]
    #3772958 - 02/13/05 04:21 AM (11 years, 9 months ago)

i had the same thing when i was in a car crash. I still wont talk to my girlfriend if i know she is driving and on her cell phone. I hate when people get cocky behind the wheel i just get all nervous.


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OfflineTasty_Smurf_House
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Re: Scared of being in cars. [Re: SHiZNO]
    #3772982 - 02/13/05 04:27 AM (11 years, 9 months ago)

um, well technically the crash was not bad in the sense that no one was hurt, but it was one of those things were if we'd been a lil bit further back i would have got creamed. we were making a left turn and got t-boned by a truck. i was on the passenger side and the truck hit right behind where i was sitting and shattered the window behind me and fucked up my door. somehow i didnt get hurt although they used the jaws of life to rip my door off and take me to the hospital cause they didn't know if my neck was ok or not and they wanted to be careful.

anyways the shitty thing was i saw the truck coming, like i was watching that specific truck as my friend was waiting for cars to pass before going hey, so i saw it coming and he starts going im like DUDE!!! and yeah. it was fucked and i thought i was gonna die, and it was the most fucked up feeling i've ever felt. and i felt it again in one of the dreams i had :frown:


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Offlineheadset
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Re: Scared of being in cars. [Re: Tasty_Smurf_House]
    #3773139 - 02/13/05 06:11 AM (11 years, 9 months ago)

I feel the same. For not particular reason. i just dont like being in a 2000 pound missle surrounded by many other distracted people in power positions over my life. I think its perfectly rational. Ride a bike, or a bus. Its good for you.


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Offlineheadset
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Re: Scared of being in cars. [Re: Tasty_Smurf_House]
    #3773140 - 02/13/05 06:11 AM (11 years, 9 months ago)

I feel the same. For not particular reason. i just dont like being in a 2000 pound missle surrounded by many other distracted people in power positions over my life. I think its perfectly rational. Ride a bike, or a bus. Its good for you.


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OfflineDreamer987
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Re: Scared of being in cars. [Re: Tasty_Smurf_House]
    #3774507 - 02/13/05 04:45 PM (11 years, 9 months ago)

Had the exact same situation happen to me.
You are just more aware of the fragility of human life now. Weather in the car, at home, or fucking your woman. You will die. Mabey today.
Now you could go. "Holy shit, were all gonna die!" and get in a fetal position.
Or you could accept death as an inevitability. Keep it with you all the time. So that when your cruising on the freeway, you can smile, and think "i could die right now"
See you have to make death your friend. Learn to accept death as the next big step. Like getting laid, or eating 7 grams of mushrooms.
An exercise to activate lucid dreaming is to tell yourself all the time "am i awake, or dreaming?" to make yourself more comfortable with death. tell yourself throughout the day. "i could die right now"

As you come to terms with death, not only will you lose your fear. But you will come to understand, and appreciate life more.


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OfflineToTheSummit
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Re: Scared of being in cars. [Re: Tasty_Smurf_House]
    #3775758 - 02/13/05 09:58 PM (11 years, 9 months ago)

I've been in some serious accidents in my time.  I've even been in three accidents in which the vehicle I was in was totalled (I was only driving in one of them).  Had to spend some time in the hospital (but luckily had no life threatening or long-term injuries).  And yet, I've never once felt nervous in a vehicle.  I just don't think about it I guess.
:shrug:

I still drive hundreds of miles around town each week for work and many more on my own time.  I never think about having an accident.  Instead, I just concentrate on the moment.  Defensive driving is the key!  And always wear a seatbelt just in case some other dumb-ass decides its your (un)lucky day.

Oh, and if you want to know what it is to be afraid on the road, ride a motorcycle!  I rode mine to work every day for years.  Never got wiped out, but had some really close calls.  And when you are on a bike you will always lose in an accident!  I always have a bit of fear in me when I ride my bike on the streets.


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You invented the wheel....You push the motherfucker!!


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OfflineJacquesCousteau
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Re: Scared of being in cars. [Re: Dreamer987]
    #3816733 - 02/22/05 02:15 PM (11 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

Dreamer987 said:
Or you could accept death as an inevitability. Keep it with you all the time. So that when your cruising on the freeway, you can smile, and think "i could die right now"
See you have to make death your friend. Learn to accept death as the next big step. Like getting laid, or eating 7 grams of mushrooms.




Bingo!

Tasty: Your fear is not of getting in cars. Your fear is of death. You have mis-labeled it, which is making it hard for you to solve.

Meditate on death... confront your fear. The idea of death cannot hurt you. Thinking about it might make you feel bad, but confront those feelings and realize that your feelings do not dictate reality. Acknowledge and accept that you will die someday. Keep death by your side like an old friend. If you're ever in a situation where you feel you might die, say to yourself, "This could be the day I finally unwrap the greatest mystery I've ever known."

Death is just another word for "the unknown." It is natural for humans to fear the unknown... it is an instinctive reaction. A "mini-program" that runs in the background, designed to protect us. It is a part of the ego, originally implemented for our benefit.

However... as one progresses through life without having stopped to acknowledge the existance of these automated response systems, they become "unchecked"... --which is basically just another way of saying that as we grow up we become lazy and no longer bother to remain aware of our own thoughts, behavior, and actions.

Our brains are like very complex computer systems with automated tasking to make things easier on the user. But even the most advanced automated computer systems need a USER to monitor it, because automated systems are prone to err... it's the price we pay for the convenience of automation.

When the user (each of us) thinks, "Hey! Look at this, this thing runs itself! I don't even have to pay attention!" Sure, things might go alright for a while, but before you know it some kind of conflict arises and you've got core meltdown going on and don't even know why.

Now... this fear of the unknown, or fear of death (whichever we prefer to label it for the moment) is just one of these automated systems running rampant. It needs the user (YOU) to step in, administer logical thought, and take control.

If one were to apply awareness and logical thought to the situation you find yourself in (I mean, literally, in the very moment you find yourself in a panic over the idea of death being possible) they would find a conclusion something along the lines of, "If everyone dies eventually, and I have NO way of knowing when that will be, there is NO benefit in worrying about it. By allowing these reactions, I only add unnecessary stress and anxiety to my life."

If you were to stop your emotional reaction dead in it's tracks and counter it with logical reasoning (such as above) you would see a drastic change in no time.

We have the power to control these automated systems, if only we choose to acknowledge it. (An easy and familiar example would be breathing... we do it subconsciously, but if we choose to become aware of it we can make it a conscious action that we control.)

This can be difficult, and it can take a lot of concentration, awareness, and willpower... but this does not make it impossible. If you commit yourself and stay focused, you are COMPLETELY capable of breaking yourself of ANY habitual or automated thoughts/actions.

Or if you'd prefer to stick to the so-called "easy" route: wait another year or two, you'll get over it.  :grin:


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InvisibleSociety
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Re: Scared of being in cars. [Re: Tasty_Smurf_House]
    #3819176 - 02/22/05 10:43 PM (11 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

Tasty_Smurf_House said:
Was in a car crash last summer. Since then I've been often scared, sometimes extremely scared, while being in a vehicle. I can't stand it. It seems like everytime we turn I'm gonna get hit by a car or something. Sometimes when in a vehicle I'm like oh shit I'm gonna die :frown:




I can relate completely.  Everytime I'm in a car, thoughts run through my head about how one millisecond could lead to instant death, slow, torturous death, or worst of all- paralysis, lost body parts and other permanenty injuries.  Driving honestly doesn't seem worth it at all to me, but in today's society there's few alternatives.  I generally try to walk places as much as possible.

and it's not necessarily how well YOU drive; some extremely unskilled or intoxicated driver could slam into you... or an experienced driver.  The driving system in this country is vastly overrated in my opinion and leads to so much death and suffering.  :frown:


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OfflinePsiloSimon
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Re: Scared of being in cars. [Re: Society]
    #3850826 - 03/01/05 07:05 AM (11 years, 9 months ago)

Same with me. My whole life I have always felt uncomfortable in a car. Especially if I am not driving. I get really tense and I think that any second we are going to swerve off the road and my body will attempt to mix with plastic and steel. I have had 2 bad experiences that mentally screwed me up.

#1-
I was driving downhill on this winding mountain road in traffic. It had just started to rain, and this motherfucker was tailgating me really hard. This was really stressful for me and I started to get a little angry and more aggressive in my driving thinking that If I got a little ahead of him he wouldn't ride my ass as hard. So a come to a straightaway and I gunned it a little bit. Then I went to make the turn, but to my surprise I went straight because of the wet ground and I was hydroplaning. I crashed into the side of the road and @ about 40 and I missed this telephone pole by like 2 feet, it flew right by me. Luckily I wasn't physically injured. But it fucked me up mentally.

#2
I was on 4.5 grams of some Cubes and me and my friend had arranged for this female acquaintance of mine to drive us around while we where under the influence. Turns out she was coming down of meth and heroin, and was not in the best mood. She drove us up into another winding mountain road with cliffs on either side. She was crying and saying how she didn't care anymore and scary shit like that. All the while driving faster and faster. I was tripping really hard and I was so unbelievably scared. I was seeing trees and rocks wiz past me and I kept thinking "any second now and I'll be in a free fall". I was really considering jumping out of the moving car, thinking that it wouldn't be as bad as going off the cliff. Finally after it seems like (a lifetime) a while I calmed her down and we eventually made it back home. But I have never been the same since then.


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IRS: We've got what it takes to take what you've got.



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Invisibleniteowl
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Re: Scared of being in cars. [Re: Tasty_Smurf_House]
    #3850844 - 03/01/05 07:21 AM (11 years, 9 months ago)

That fear is called Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.(PTSD) You may have to go see a therapist to get over your fear.


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InvisibleSociety
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Re: Scared of being in cars. [Re: niteowl]
    #3872262 - 03/05/05 10:46 AM (11 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

Same with me. My whole life I have always felt uncomfortable in a car. Especially if I am not driving. I get really tense and I think that any second we are going to swerve off the road and my body will attempt to mix with plastic and steel. I have had 2 bad experiences that mentally screwed me up.




Yes, I've never had any bad experiences to do with drugs, but I have dreams that stem from my fear of driving all the time. My dream last night revolved around me driving on the highway for the duration of the dream. I had kept driving around but for some reason I was such a horrible driver that I'd forget how to break properly so I kept swerving around parked cars in the middle of the highway. I probably crashed about 15-20 times in my dream last night, but fortunately it didn't end up being a nightmare because I discovered my ability to "rewind time by 5 seconds"...


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InvisibleTODAY
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Re: Scared of being in cars. [Re: Tasty_Smurf_House]
    #3872890 - 03/05/05 02:47 PM (11 years, 9 months ago)

i'm scared as hell of riding on the freeway. i know kids my age who died in freeway wrecks and i have very high anxiety while riding passenger.


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ca'rouse (k-rouz)
intr.v.
To engage in boisterous, drunken merrymaking.


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InvisibleTODAY
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Re: Scared of being in cars. [Re: JacquesCousteau]
    #3872905 - 03/05/05 02:54 PM (11 years, 9 months ago)

jacquescousteau...i think that's the best/most intelligent advice i've ever heard. 5 to you...i'm blown away.


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ca'rouse (k-rouz)
intr.v.
To engage in boisterous, drunken merrymaking.


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Invisibleswm
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Re: Scared of being in cars. [Re: Tasty_Smurf_House]
    #3875692 - 03/06/05 03:36 AM (11 years, 9 months ago)

I've been in about 6 car crashes, I'm extremely lucky I came out uninjured in all of them.On the other hand I've lost one girlfriend and my best friend to a car crashes.
I'm still not afraid to get in a car. Everyone thinks differently though. I just feel when my numbers up my numbers up. If it's your time then there's nothing you can do.
Everybody is going to die, it's not a choice it's a matter of when and how. I just don't understand why someone should worry about the inevitable. You could get hit by lightning 5 minutes from now or die of cancer at 110.


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I can't spell and I have poor grammar.The crap I just posted is proof enough.


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