ReverendMyc said:

I will always upvote butt sprayer recommendations.

And don't get me started on hemorrhoid war stories. After the final surgery, the nurse told me mine wasn't the largest she had ever seen, but it was a close second place.

Don't click it.
Imagine if you will laying naked on your side on the bathroom floor trying to shove a fist sized tumor back inside your rectum so you can crawl back into bed the night before surgery. Not to mention the cattle prodder they shove inside to cauterize the remaining unhealed tissue in the follow up visits.
I warned you.

Still worth it in the end.

Don't sit on the toilet reading. Get an egg timer and then get up.

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andymc said:

AstroSporeFiend said:

I am. Discovered the wonders of the butt sprayer when I was in Tokyo changer!

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We were there recently, and our little daughters also seemed quite fond of the front sprayer for ladies, sitting there giggling and pressing the button

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ReverendMyc said:

I am fine with the cold. However, my lady friends all agree that they prefer a warm option for the female setting. Not an issue here in the summer when the water comes out of the tap at 85f, but not pleasant for squatters in the winter, I guess.

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Sulfurshelfsean said:

... Prayers for your butthole.

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Why, thank you!

I don't think that anyone has ever said that to me before.


For real, though. If you need the surgery, get it. It has improved my quality of life tremendously. We tried that stupid banding thing at Mayo a few times and it never took or lasted. Now I eat serrano chilis like m&ms and live to poop another day.

GenesisCorrupted said:

AZ Starman2112 said:

@Beef - Yeah man shoulder is tough too. I tore my R rotator cuff right off the bone. 5 anchors to hold it in place. Terrible recovery. Couldn’t wipe my own ass the first two weeks. Total of 5 months out of work.

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I take it you're a member of the bidet brotherhood now.

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andymc said:

Here's a story you'll enjoy.  My first one, they did with a local anesthetic and a single keyhole incision.

Problem is, I have a high tolerance for locals - thick nerve sheaths according to a dental surgeon - and usually require double- or triple-doses.

I did warn them.  But the vasectomy surgeons didn't check to make sure I was numb before they started cutting.

I nearly jumped off the fucking table

The recovery time was fast for me.  I just happened to be the lucky 1-in-4000 (or whatever it is) whose vasectomy heals itself.  When they tested me over subsequent months, my number which was supposed to be zero kept rising exponentially, until at 900k they decided maybe it hadn't worked

The second one they did under general, since they wanted to have a nice leisurely look-around in there.  But again, the recovery was just a few days, and I got my desired result.

No pain, no noticeable side-effects of any kind, and even the scars are tiny and difficult to find.

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Holy smokes Andy, I'm glad it worked the second time, but damn that is some unlucky shit right there I had a gallstone over an inch giving me 8 months of hell before the doctors found out what it was, the paint was so bad I would get dizzy and almost pass out, I think that episode really got to me so I'm scared of being among the 2% were the pain remain until they revert the vasectomy, I know it's a low risk, but it still get to me.

But it seems that even when you guys have complications it works out in the end, guess I have to man up Thanks for sharing your story dude, appreciate it

Churpee Choozle said:

It was an experience. I mean when you expect pain, you can kind of prepare, and at least not do stupid stuff. Like sit still when you get a couple of stitches.

Well I didn't expect pain and was pretty nervous about the whole thing. Did everything wrong the moment I felt that cold scalpel. Like trying to do a backwards shoulder roll. They immediately gave me another jab and the pain subsided really fast, but I had kicked over stuff and bitten my tongue, so was bleeding like a pig. Then they had to fetch someone else to look at the unintended damage and I was just jabbering and muttering and felt very insane. They gave me some pretty good tranquilizer to shut me up.

Sorry kloakk, tried to save this for when you had had yours, but then Andy came in with his story. And I've had a few beers.

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Don't be sorry, I like it when people give it to me straight.



Thanks for sharing as well Churpee

AZ Starman2112 said:

@Rev - fuck bro. Sounds like hell man. Damn.

@Gen - only one problem. Sink & toilet are on opposite side of the bathroom and no electricity by the toilet. 👎🏻

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Churpee Choozle said:

Sorry puff, I cannot emulate your exemplary way of communicating. Never rude, never over the line, witty without being crude.

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Churpee Choozle said:

Sorry puff, I cannot emulate your exemplary way of communicating. Never rude, never over the line, witty without being crude.

But, whenever someone writes something that really makes my blood boil, I always try to answer in your style. Instead of just blurt out stuff about my balls or mites or gnats or ball gnats or whatever other random gross stuff.

So, point being, apparently, if I don't like what people have to say I'm polite, the rest of the time I'm a dirty asshole looking for a bidet with its single brown eye. Hmmm. Question marks are in place. I'll see myself out.

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