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Re: The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The Unofficial Cultivation Off Topic Discussion. [Re: callmehippie]
    #29421838 -

Sorry.

the Little Hippie inside me was yelling at me to post that about the water.

:hippie:


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:hippie::mushroom2:Take it easy. if it's easy. take it twice:mushroom2::mushroom2:
:sporedrop:The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Shroomery:sporedrop:

**A LINK TO EVERTHING**


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Re: The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The Unofficial Cultivation Off Topic Discussion. [Re: callmehippie]
    #29421840 -

. When I lived in Florida  I shopped at a place called Piggly wiggly. So that's why your joke didn't necessarily "hit"

I thought maybe there was actually a place called Wally World where you were from that I've never heard of either.

Don't worry though gil. I know you're funny as hell:lol:


--------------------
:hippie::mushroom2:Take it easy. if it's easy. take it twice:mushroom2::mushroom2:
:sporedrop:The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Shroomery:sporedrop:

**A LINK TO EVERTHING**


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Re: The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The Unofficial Cultivation Off Topic Discussion. [Re: Kloakk] * 1
    #29421845 -

Kloakk said:
Gilmour Hendrix said:
Kloakk- Thanks for that. In the back of my mind I wonder if the jokes hit. It's difficult in a text based format to know if a joke lands. In person? I know genuine laughter from "I don't get it" laughter. If I can pull that genuine laughter out of a person, I can get a feel for their flavor of humor. Then, I revisit that style of humor and build friendships with it.




I get that, the thing though, you'll never be ready, and that is okay :hug:
My suggestion is to just be you and build friendships with whoever gets it, but I am blessed, I got my wife and kids, ain't really got that much too loose with just being myself, not everyone has that security.

True story, I like you, deal with it :crankey:




Kloakk this really hits home for me.

Couldn't have  said it better myself. I really do got everything I need just here between me and my family. That's something you can never take for granted for sure .

It wasn't always like that but you definitely notice  Once you do obtain that security.


--------------------
:hippie::mushroom2:Take it easy. if it's easy. take it twice:mushroom2::mushroom2:
:sporedrop:The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Shroomery:sporedrop:

**A LINK TO EVERTHING**


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Re: The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The Unofficial Cultivation Off Topic Discussion. [Re: callmehippie] * 2
    #29421850 -

Gil. i like  to take some time out and do some things that just make me smile in general. A little bit of that everyday could helps me get out of my funk. When im im one.

Like Thurman had said try not to accept it and settle..

That dude is wise. trust me I know. We're friends. :grin:

And do some activities or hang out with some people that are intentionally and undeniably happy or positive..

I know it sounds cliche.

especially when you're feeling super depressed and  not  wanting to do any of that to begin with.

But it does work for me sometimes. Just going out with my son and and being silly. seeing him happy uplifts my spirits a lot. And reminds what/who im living for.


--------------------
:hippie::mushroom2:Take it easy. if it's easy. take it twice:mushroom2::mushroom2:
:sporedrop:The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Shroomery:sporedrop:

**A LINK TO EVERTHING**


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Re: The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The Unofficial Cultivation Off Topic Discussion. [Re: callmehippie] * 4
    #29421855 -

Forreal. 5min vacations from life are great. Doing things for yourself, even if its making your coffee extra good go a long way. Gratitude is the attitude


--------------------
"Remember, kids, the difference between science and screwing around is writing it down" -adam savage
Flowchart for Recommended plan of action.
Learn the tried and true way to grow mushrooms
Use the Damn search engine
After you know what you're doing, take a break 
Pick a book, Make some chips!
Josex said:Don't take the site seriously bro, ain't worth it.
 

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Re: The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The Unofficial Cultivation Off Topic Discussion. [Re: callmehippie]
    #29421857 -

callmehippie said:
Kloakk this really hits home for me.

Couldn't have  said it better myself. I really do got everything I need just here between me and my family. That's something you can never take for granted for sure .

It wasn't always like that but you definitely notice  Once you do obtain that security.



Yeah, and it makes it even worse on some level, see, if my wife died, then I'd be lost for sure, one thing is losing the love of my life, but what the fuck do I tell my children :uhoh:

It's a great sidequest, family. It has me occupied at the moment.


--------------------
“All Fungi are edible.

Some fungi are only edible once.”
― Terry Pratchett


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Re: The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The Unofficial Cultivation Off Topic Discussion. [Re: callmehippie] * 1
    #29421859 -

Hippie- Piggly Wiggly and Wally World sound like subsidiaries of each other! Ha!

I have that uber positive friend that makes me jealous how happy he is all the time. I haven't hung out with him in almost two years. He keeps messaging me to maintain contact. I feel like shit because I know he's just trying to be my friend. We have a lot of common interests, too. Always a good time when we do stuff. Either, I go to his place and he pours booze down my throat while we shoot pool or he comes to my place and we mag dump ammo into piles of garbage. I just realized how much I miss that fucker. Yeah. Good advice, Hippie!

Kloakk- Damn it man! Can't you see I'm busy being miserable over here! :lol: jk. I'm ok being myself if I'm in the company of an ally but one on one with someone that I know doesnt like me, I'll be like "Yeah but did you see this neat trick I can do?". A big flaw in my character but I just want everyone to be happy and comfortable. Even at my own expense. Oh and P.S. I likes ya, too

Tryp- I agree. I spoiled myself with a big ol' spread of greek food tonight. Complete with dessert and a bottle of wine. My lady had stuff going on so she wasn't here. It felt good to ugly eat and spend time with my kitty cats. I might eat some shrooms tomorrow. I haven't tried the x7x+ yet.


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Re: The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The Unofficial Cultivation Off Topic Discussion. [Re: Gilmour Hendrix] * 1
    #29421867 -

Sounds like a good time


--------------------
"Remember, kids, the difference between science and screwing around is writing it down" -adam savage
Flowchart for Recommended plan of action.
Learn the tried and true way to grow mushrooms
Use the Damn search engine
After you know what you're doing, take a break 
Pick a book, Make some chips!
Josex said:Don't take the site seriously bro, ain't worth it.
 

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Re: The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The Unofficial Cultivation Off Topic Discussion. [Re: Gilmour Hendrix] * 2
    #29421871 -

Gilmour Hendrix said:
Kloakk- Damn it man! Can't you see I'm busy being miserable over here! :lol: jk. I'm ok being myself if I'm in the company of an ally but one on one with someone that I know doesnt like me, I'll be like "Yeah but did you see this neat trick I can do?". A big flaw in my character but I just want everyone to be happy and comfortable. Even at my own expense. Oh and P.S. I likes ya, too




I think I get that. And be miserable, easy to relate that way. And I can totally get to wanting everyone to be happy and comfortable. Funny thing though, some people feel happy and comfortable with not liking me, like, they feed off it. And that's cool I guess, at least it's easy to give them what they want.

This might seem cruel, but it's really not. But when you say:"I just want everyone to be happy and comfortable." You are trying to sell a "product", the problem though is that you(the salesman) don't believe, or live by, the "product". So if you are selling happiness and comfortably, and you aren't happy or comfortable, why the fuck should I buy it?


--------------------
“All Fungi are edible.

Some fungi are only edible once.”
― Terry Pratchett


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Re: The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The Unofficial Cultivation Off Topic Discussion. [Re: Kloakk]
    #29421879 -

Damn. Yeah. Artificial favoring and self-preservatives throughout. I learned a lot today. It's like class around here. Learn it, put it into practice. This week is going to be an odd one. Putting into practice these things we have discussed and knowing that I'm quitting my current job even though I'm not quite ready to put in my notice. This is a rare combination of confidence and "don't care". These feeling don't usually cross paths in my character. Feels good when they do though!


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Re: The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The Unofficial Cultivation Off Topic Discussion. [Re: Gilmour Hendrix] * 1
    #29421881 -

and P.S. I'm not havent held anything back in all of this that we have discussed over the last 24 hours in this thread. All of it from the heart, man.


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Re: The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The Unofficial Cultivation Off Topic Discussion. [Re: tryptkaloids] * 1
    #29421900 -

There are two quick fixes to instantaneous happiness. But it doesn't last.

Studys show if you get in a pen full of puppies and play with them it's almost impossible to not be happy.



Another thing you can do that's been shown to work is get a big group of people like 15 or 20 to all clap yell and cheer for you. As if you were in a race or something and about to win.

Your mood changes instantly.




Ps. I think..

if you can get in a pen full of 15 Precious Puppies and somehow Still Remain sad or angry. then you're a psychopath:lol:


--------------------
:hippie::mushroom2:Take it easy. if it's easy. take it twice:mushroom2::mushroom2:
:sporedrop:The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Shroomery:sporedrop:

**A LINK TO EVERTHING**


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Re: The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The Unofficial Cultivation Off Topic Discussion. [Re: Gilmour Hendrix] * 4
    #29422093 -

Gil, I think the most impactful thing for me was recognizing my anxiety and depression immediately and not two weeks into to it.

From there I’ve tried lots of different methods to kick its ass.

What’s worked:
Diet/ sleep/ vitamins
Exercise
Therapist
Church (even atheists can benefit from the message)
Understanding my past trauma (game changer)
Meditation
Positive affirmation
Knowing triggers
Xanax! 😂
I quit drinking (this is new to me but wow! I wish I would have done this 20 years ago)

What hasn’t:
Psychiatrist
Different meds every other month
Weed
Alcohol
Ignoring it and quietly wondering what’s wrong with me.

Basically I decided one day that anxiety/ depression is my bitch and not the other way around.

Know and understand your triggers. You can’t always avoid them but if you go into them eyes wide open they are much easier to navigate.

Anyway so for your current trigger of having to put in your two weeks, just do it. Get it over with and you will feel infinitely better! Get out a piece of paper and write down what you’re going to say. Tweak it, read it and write it again. It will make it much easier to spit the words out when it’s rehearsed.

I understand exactly how you feel by the way. You got a better opportunity and you feel guilty for abandoning your current employer for a better opportunity. It’s like breaking up with a girl you’re just friends with because you met the love of your life.

To sum all of this up, Therapy has been the best thing for me. Talking to someone that really gets you once a week is super helpful.


--------------------
The Hitchikers Guide to the Shroomery

Sometimes you just have to shut up and color!
~CMS Wilbur

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Re: The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The Unofficial Cultivation Off Topic Discussion. [Re: OLDDAD77] * 3
    #29422178 -

In the 4 months I have been here with you all, I have learned quite a bit about myself. Now I have ammo to fight the thing that brought me here.

Thanks for sharing what helps you. I'm going to try to find a therapist to start with when I get on my new schedule with the new job.

I'm not ready to put in my notice because I'm waiting for some paperwork to be processed. Once I get the 'go ahead' from the new job, I'll be able to put in my notice. I'll do it proudly because this is me doing better than before. I'll also do it proudly because my current company is known for being shady and screwing people over. I knew going in that they would be a stepping stone to help me get where I'm going.

I'm hoping to be an example for the younger guys in that you dont have to deal with BS at a job. There are other, better opportunities out there. Some of them are drinking the company kool-aid so they wont get the message, but others will.

Thanks again for taking the time to offer your guidance. Oh and I looked into CPTSD. When reading about it, I remembered I was diagnosed with BPD probably 20 years ago. I thought I got through it but that could be part of my problem. Either way, I'm going to seek therapy.


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Re: The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The Unofficial Cultivation Off Topic Discussion. [Re: Gilmour Hendrix] * 1
    #29422190 -

I’m beginning to think most of the cookie cutter disorders are from unresolved trauma. Not all but most. PTSD will make you think you’re crazy.

Get that offer letter and bounce!


--------------------
The Hitchikers Guide to the Shroomery

Sometimes you just have to shut up and color!
~CMS Wilbur

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Re: The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The Unofficial Cultivation Off Topic Discussion. [Re: OLDDAD77] * 2
    #29422198 -

I agree that trauma is the source of most of our troubles here. I have plenty but I don't want to share everything here and bring you all down. I'll save it for the therapist.

I have my offer letter, just have to wait for my screening to go through. No doubts there.

Also, I suspect when I put in my notice at the current job, they will walk me out on the spot. They are know for this as well. I might just quit, no notice so I can work and get all the holiday pay. This will be my 2nd time leaving there so I wont be able to go back anyway. They don't do 3rd chances. Not that I care. So, yeah. No notice.


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Re: The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The Unofficial Cultivation Off Topic Discussion. [Re: Gilmour Hendrix] * 2
    #29422202 -

Yeah bro if your current employer is like that then get your offer letter signed, get your start date and bounce the day before. Doesn’t sound like there is a bridge to burn and why lose money over a company that doesn’t give a fuck about you.


--------------------
The Hitchikers Guide to the Shroomery

Sometimes you just have to shut up and color!
~CMS Wilbur

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Re: The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The Unofficial Cultivation Off Topic Discussion. [Re: Gilmour Hendrix] * 3
    #29422204 -

There's pretty good therapies for BPD, Gil. Hope you get good therapy and it helps you.

You're probably a really interesting and / but intense person to hang out with. I am biased as fuck, being married to someone with that diagnosis. And having had several relationships in 'that sector'. Candles that burn with the flame of a blowtorch. Love em.


--------------------
No nation, no border
Fight law and order


Species grown so far

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Re: The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The Unofficial Cultivation Off Topic Discussion. [Re: Churpee Choozle]
    #29422220 -

Someone correct me if I'm wrong, but if you get fired on the spot for putting in a 2 weeks notice you can get unemployment on their dime at the very least.


--------------------
"Remember, kids, the difference between science and screwing around is writing it down" -adam savage
Flowchart for Recommended plan of action.
Learn the tried and true way to grow mushrooms
Use the Damn search engine
After you know what you're doing, take a break 
Pick a book, Make some chips!
Josex said:Don't take the site seriously bro, ain't worth it.
 

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Re: The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The Unofficial Cultivation Off Topic Discussion. [Re: Churpee Choozle] * 1
    #29422223 -

Thanks, Churp!

I used to be a lot to handle when I was younger. I was also on drugs. That didnt help my case! :rofl:

I have chilled out but I do "get on a roll" sometimes. Usually when everything is going ok. I'm like a truck (or lorry) with no breaks. Historically, thats when I make bad decisions. Had a lot of fun because of it, tho!

But I have slowed down a lot. Other than work, I'm a recluse. I enjoy my privacy at home in the woods with my kitties and my peace & quiet.

Tryp, I'm not sure. You still lose a "waiting week" before you can claim, if this is the case.


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