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LSD trip changed my life, now I don't know what to do about it
    #24086039 -

Let me give you some background information. I am a white male from a middle class family. I turned 18 not too long ago. I've been diagnosed ND medicated for various mental health conditions ( anxiety, depression, ADHD, and bipolar). I haven't taken traditional medication in about 2 years because I didn't like the effect it had on my mind and personality. From about the age of 12 I was very depressed and got into drugs. I was into opiates heavily for about 2 years from age 13 to 15, got into high school and started to get into legal trouble. Spent the majority of the time I was supposed to be in High school locked up in between jail and group homes. Graduated High school while in the system and got out and went to tech college for a year while simultaneously working a full time job as a bagger. Since I used to do so many dangerous drugs and I've been hospitalized numerous times for overdose I only smoked weed for a while. Then when I turned 18 I was introduced to LSD. And that got me into trying other pscadelics such as DMT and mushrooms. About 2 months ago I had my last trip. I was on a relatively low dose of acid and during the peak I felt a change happen. It was like there was a pressure where my third eye is and all of a sudden I understood why I have always been unsatisfied with my life. Humans are nothing but animals, one of many that share this planet. And every aspect of my life is controlled by technology, my corrupted government and banking system, and my mind and body has been poisoned for years by the food and beverages I have consumed. All my friends are about to or just graduated High School and are going to college or tech school to pursue a trade of some sort. Today while I was smoking with my friend he wanted to have a conversation about what career I wanted to choose and I just avoided the conversation. Since that day I can't view any of my friends, family, or life the same. It's not that I don't care about them or the quality of my own life, it's that I don't want to spend my life working some job just so I can come home and maybe take a vacation every few years. I want to explore the world, findinner purpose, and escape the way of life modern humans live in the Western world. Whenever I try to share my thoughts people either look at my funny or I can tell they think my thinking is skewed as a result of my drug use. On top of these new revelations I have been more depressed than ever. I don't want to die but I'm not happy in the world society has created. I've been looking into places I could live the lifestyle I think would make me happy but they are all paid vacation retreat type deals, no community for free thinkers. Hell, I'd be happier as a farmer in the remote wilderness than I would be in my current situation. Plus my family is making me move out so with the little amount of money I make I don't know how I could escape. It just feels like pscadelics left me with a newfound understanding but no wisdom to do anything about it. It's like being aware your child is about to be killed but not being able to stop it. I just want to be happy but it doesn't look like society will allow that unless I choose to conform. Any insight, advice, similar experiences?


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Re: LSD trip changed my life, now I don't know what to do about it [Re: bakerb287]
    #24086050 -

Yeah it didn't change your life, but thats a common misunderstanding - more like, it changed your mind about something about yourself or an old view on life got destroyed or was replaced by a new one that better suits you as a living human on all levels...maybe. 

Your young and haven't even experienced worldly life yet.  Give it a shot - save up some money - live like a good man and a wise man - then you can choose what to do if you want to live a life unknown to the "world" or if you want to travel and stay connected or what have you.  This is a common thing with psychedelics and with the young it is misleading because the experience is so powerful yet they have no real life experience on their own.  Some say to give such a "revelation or insight" 10 years to ripen then see if its real or not - ie. if you are truly the living embodiment of such a revelation - or if you need more practice heh.


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Give me Liberty caps or give me Death caps.

Edited by The Blind Ass (02/12/17 09:43 PM)

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Re: LSD trip changed my life, now I don't know what to do about it [Re: The Blind Ass]
    #24086052 -

You can always discover and practice the middle path..in my experience and opinion it leads to a life worth living regardless of ones situation or personal condition and its something we can start and practice in the here and now and see real change in the here in now within ourselfs.  We are all in this together whether we realize it or not...even your friends and family you dont want to face.  Im sure somewhere in their life they have pondered the same thing on their own time and are now living with themselves.  Since your young and still dependent on family and what not - try changing what you can - like your life style and bad habits, friends, tastes, healthy living - food, sleep, drugs etc.  Clean it all up and go from there...because if you dont likely you'll just delude yourself further.

Thats my 2 cents of biased opinion.

Edited by The Blind Ass (02/12/17 09:41 PM)

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Re: LSD trip changed my life, now I don't know what to do about it [Re: The Blind Ass]
    #24086061 -

Just because psychedelics may show you a reality doesn't make it the reality.

In any case, this is an insight pretty much everyone has with or without psychedelics, especially middle class people. You learn how to negotiate the interaction between your circumstances, your goals, and the present reality. There's going to be a lot of powerlessness and frustration involved in that.

Edited by djbluntmagic (02/12/17 09:41 PM)

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Re: LSD trip changed my life, now I don't know what to do about it [Re: The Blind Ass]
    #24086066 -

I have been trying to clean up my habits. I had been eating very healthy excluding the past couple days and went from being a daily Cannabis user to a weekend smoker. Although I am dependant on my family I pay for everything but rent, and last week was told I have two weeks to move so I will be paying rent too. I do still connect with my love ones but the connection feels different. I care about my friends way more than they care for me, and it shows through our actions. My family has never been supportive of me. I knew all these things but lately I just decided to stop trying so hard to satisfy others.I don't really care anymore. At this point I just want something life hasn't shown me yet, and the problem is I have no idea what that is.


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Re: LSD trip changed my life, now I don't know what to do about it [Re: djbluntmagic]
    #24086069 -

I do understand that as well. I'm content with the fact I will never understand everything or even most of why things are the way they are. But there were blatant lies that I couldn't ignore.


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Re: LSD trip changed my life, now I don't know what to do about it [Re: djbluntmagic]
    #24086071 -

Humans are meant to expierence suffering , if you didn't know what bad is you wouldn't know what good was , yin and yang
Ya got a long life ahead of ya


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54. The true nature of things is to be known personally , through the eyes of clear illumination and not through a sage : what the moon exactly is , is to be known with one's own eyes ; can another make him know it?

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Re: LSD trip changed my life, now I don't know what to do about it [Re: connectedcosmos]
    #24086136 -

baker you sound level headed for the most part, just have to be weary since I am speaking with a "stranger" on the internet.  Never quite can tell where someone is in life in their head and in life when its like that.  Be healthy man and try and get an education and a decent job.  That way if you really want to opt out of normal life but still live and explore you can it'll just take living like a frugal monk and saving up for a few years...being healthy and not drug dependent and having a relatively stable financial income helps with that.  Best to you man.  Your realizations are yours alone - maybe shared by some but still.  Know what you know and know its as far as it goes and no further.  Keep your head up and chin up and everything is going to keep changing in life - just like a trip - so knowing that your in for a ride - so ride knowing you have your whole life to live - live like your really living right now! cause you are!  and that doesnt mean pack everything up and burn all your bridges - its personal to you - maybe it means working your hardest with what you got right now.  Maybe it means working some shitty job and going to night classes for 3 years until you get a degree and then you bide your time and become successful and happy with your efforts and see them pay off.  Whatever it is, may you stay true to the best you.

Edited by The Blind Ass (02/12/17 10:33 PM)

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Re: LSD trip changed my life, now I don't know what to do about it [Re: The Blind Ass]
    #24086456 -

The answer is to find out what you love to do and go do it. Most drugs are okay to do, but when they rule your life it becomes a major problem. You have to find your place in the world.

I know one guy who probably had one these revelations about himself, yet he's the biggest asshole you'll ever meet and one of the laziest supposed hard working people out there. I worked for him for a couple months and eventually I just decided I didn't deserve to take that kind of abuse in 110 degree heat and quit. I don't think I've ever felt so good in my life.

Point being, it's NOT about how hard you work or how much money you make or your job title. It's really all about being happy. Most people settle with being content or delude themselves into thinking they're going make millions, that guy I mentioned is one of the latter.

I agree it is very hard to be happy with the way life is around the world. I plan on doing something about it. I have a plan and hopefully it will chip away at the mountain of ego, pride, and greed on this planet.


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"I found it is the small everyday deeds of ordinary folk that keep the darkness at bay… small acts of kindness and love.” - Gandalf The Grey.

"It is the mark of an educated mind to entertain a thought without accepting it." - Aristotle

"I like to think of Jesus like with giant eagle's wings, and singin' lead vocals for Lynyrd Skynyrd with like an angel band and I'm in the front row and I'm HAMMERED DRUNK!" - Cal Naughton Jr. AKA The Magic Man. Abracadabra homes!

"Each tear is a drop of poison released." - Anonymous

"Could it be you're afraid of what your friends might say if they knew you believe in God above? They should realize before they criticize that God is the only way to Love."

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Re: LSD trip changed my life, now I don't know what to do about it [Re: bakerb287]
    #24087210 -

Ríght on man, give it some time. :cool:

Opportunities will open up as u go, just remind ur self everyday what u want out of this life, how u want to be, and work to become that person. Ask ur self what it's gonna take..


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https://discord.gg/NHHd5y2Uyv

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Re: LSD trip changed my life, now I don't know what to do about it [Re: zZZz]
    #24087218 -

LSD is THE way to attune yourself, you've done a great thing mate.

I'd say, have some mushrooms and explore dzogchen nonmeditation.

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Re: LSD trip changed my life, now I don't know what to do about it [Re: Wesker]
    #24087356 -

Keep trying to better your situation man. At least it seems like your trip has given you some kind of push to improve. But don't jump so quickly on very dramatic information you get from tripping.

Take some time to integrate your trip into your life as it is right now. You have no idea what it would actually be like to leave society and find happiness on your own outside of this system. We actually have a lot of independent power to live happily while inside this system even if we don't necessarily like all of it.

Change the things that are already in your vicinity, one step at a time.


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LogicaL Chaos said:
"humans are like cubes, lots of strains but cubes a cube. Not much difference really."

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Re: LSD trip changed my life, now I don't know what to do about it [Re: Wesker]
    #24087726 -

Wesker said:
LSD is THE way to attune yourself, you've done a great thing mate.

I'd say, have some mushrooms and explore dzogchen nonmeditation.


yes.  dzogchen non mediatation and non action is key


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Give me Liberty caps or give me Death caps.

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Re: LSD trip changed my life, now I don't know what to do about it [Re: The Blind Ass]
    #24087886 -

.

Edited by ChemicalSpark (03/23/20 09:53 PM)

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Re: LSD trip changed my life, now I don't know what to do about it [Re: ChemicalSpark]
    #24093295 -

You opened up a can of corn buddy and now you gotta eat that corn. Uhh I want to continue this analogy to make use of a poop joke... but nothing is coming up. shit.


The experience you're feeling is very common. Imagine LSD has given you a sword, and now you're being asked to use that sword to improve your life. LSD has a way of awakening people, making them sensetive to things they've overlooked the rest of their life.

LSD has shown you a better way to live, but it has shown you this by alerting to all the things in your life that you don't enjoy. If you continue to let LSD show you the truth of things you will feel great pain but you'll also advance your life in ways you desperately need.

Those people who look at you wearily, as if your dreams come from drugs, those people are just on a different path than you. They are on a path of experiencing a regular job and usually kids, usually hitting their depression and mid-life crisis in their late 20's or mid 30's.

For people like us, people who have been awakened, that mid-life crisis comes much sooner and with much more intensity. it's a trial, and if we pass that trial we get to experience something like a heaven on earth. Our mid-life crisis hits earlier and our ability to reach our full potential shortly after also comes much sooner. Balance and all that, the extra pain felt now will balance with success and achievement before the decade is out.

basically LSD gave you a strength and now you need to use it or you'll be in a worse position than you were before.

If we see the world through the strength of LSD vision and we go back into denial of the truth, if we go back to ignoring our inner sense of guidance and go "back to sleep", then we will constantly wake up to lucidity and it will be like a nightmare. part of us will always be awakened and trying to re-awaken, the  more we repress it the stronger it becomes until we erupt in awakening. Sounds cool but it's honestly not. It's better to get a spiritual guide or someone experienced with psychedelics to guide us through the beginning awakening phases. It saves YEARS of trouble and trial and error.


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I'm THAT guy

Edited by Lionhearted (02/15/17 04:24 PM)

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Re: LSD trip changed my life, now I don't know what to do about it [Re: bakerb287]
    #24097409 -

“This above all: to thine own self be true. And it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man..." - Shakespeare's Hamlet, Act I, Scene III, Polonius to Hamlet


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γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself

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