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Ambient Drone

Registered: 09/28/03
Posts: 276
Loc: Second star on the right.
Last seen: 14 years, 15 days
Endless Loop
    #2139306 - 11/27/03 02:33 AM (14 years, 6 months ago)

if one has come to the point where they cannot accept/trust in anything... any human emotion (others or their own), anything anyone ever says (including themself and this very idea), any thought, idea, concept, belief, anything and everything. How the hell are they supposed to live running around in fucking circles like that? Its never one thing or the other, its never good or bad, light or dark, happy or sad, bravery or fear, understanding or confusion. It is every freakin thing at every single moment of every single day. Constant stream of overwhelming stimuli, so completly realistic and unrealistic, a dream and reality at the same time, all the time, forever, an endless fucking loop, no way out, nothing and everything constantly staying the same in the respct that it is always changing. Nothing stays the same, nothing stays the same, and it shouldn't and it should. You do and you don't and everything in between.

You can't turn it off because it isn't on even though it is, and it will just simply have to always be this way. Because it isn't even a way, it is some crap that keeps on making something stagnant because it is so active.

Endless spew, it won't go away, because nothing stays the same, even though nothing staying the same is the same thing over and over again. Loop, you can't escape from a loop, because to escape there would have to have been something to escape to, and the loop is all there is, no start, no beginning, and no end, and it goes on forever, always changing and staying the same. No escape. Simple, it is just like that.

I dunno why I really posted this even, sicne there really is no help I can get. But whatever, I took the time to type it might as well hit the button.

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ProfessionalPsycho - JTOKREW
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Registered: 03/15/03
Posts: 17,805
Loc: Toronto, eh?
Last seen: 13 years, 3 months
Re: Endless Loop [Re: caolite]
    #2140009 - 11/27/03 12:22 PM (14 years, 6 months ago)

I'm glad you posted.  I'm sure many of us here are experiencing that same thing where we find it hard to trust people etc.  I know i have and i am.  It's not a very nice feeling when you always find yourself putting up your wall or not accepting things at face value.  Constantly analyzing everything for fear of getting hurt or betrayed.  How does one stop this cycle or at least improve on it?  I'm not sure.  But if i find out, i'll let you know. :heart:

I would rather have had one breath of her hair, one kiss from her mouth, one touch of her hand, than eternity without it. One.

To love is to admire with the heart; to admire is to love with the mind. - Th?ophile Gautier.
Seek not every quality in one individual - Confucius.
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tales of theinexpressible

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Registered: 01/29/03
Posts: 8,670
Loc: Canoodia
Last seen: 8 years, 5 months
Re: Endless Loop [Re: caolite]
    #2140818 - 11/27/03 08:39 PM (14 years, 6 months ago)

Yep thats me. I don't feel anything is real anymore. Like this is all a big joke or a game or something. Like the truth is hidden from me and it won't show itself.


"What business is it of yours what I do, read, buy, see, say, think, who I fuck, what I take into my body - as long as I do not harm another human being on this planet?" - Bill Hicks

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