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32,711 videos
    #15706228 -

and they are 99.5% porn. It is watched in privacy every single day but porn with actual intercourse is like 3 or 4 times a week and I love me some anal. Does my boyfriend have a destructive addiction? I feel like I'm going to shut off now. I love that he watches porn and gets off alone. I am turned off by the fact that he remembers a lot of the pornstars names and has entire collections of their work. I think it's just the amount of dedication he gives it that bothers me. He teaches and does well, going out of his way for his students, especially cute ones and spends an hour or 2 every day finding, watching and hording porn. He watches it on 2 computers side by side so he can see 4-8 clips at once.... I get the left-over hours and we have some fantastic times but mostly I watch him look at lolcats or we watch Netflix. What can I do about how sick I feel over this?

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Re: 32,711 videos [Re: Fire Dancer]
    #15706247 -

Become a porn star so he can collect your videos.

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Re: 32,711 videos [Re: abltsandwich]
    #15706263 -

I have been tempted and even looked at applications through Kink.com.
Got any good stage name ideas?

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Re: 32,711 videos [Re: Fire Dancer]
    #15706271 -

Only for myself sorry but if you want to work together I have a great porn star name and some experience.

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Re: 32,711 videos [Re: Fire Dancer]
    #15706279 -

It sounds like your man is a porn addict. Needs to get his id in check. People can become addicted to pretty much anything, and combine with hoarding tendencies and you've got some complications. Try and get him to quit cold-turkey for a week. No porn, no fapping, just sex.


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The Only Illusion Is Division

Edited by EvolveShrooms (01/23/12 10:03 AM)

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Re: 32,711 videos [Re: EvolveShrooms]
    #15706281 -

his "id"?

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Re: 32,711 videos [Re: Fire Dancer]
    #15706285 -

Freudian psychology; The id is the unorganized part of the personality structure which contains the basic drives. The id acts according to the "pleasure principle", seeking to avoid pain or displeasure aroused by increases in instinctual tension.

The id is unconscious by definition:

    It is the dark, inaccessible part of our personality, what little we know of it we have learned from our study of the dream-work and of the construction of neurotic symptoms, and most of that is of a negative character and can be described only as a contrast to the ego. We approach the id with analogies: we call it a chaos, a cauldron full of seething excitations... It is filled with energy reaching it from the instincts, but it has no organization, produces no collective will, but only a striving to bring about the satisfaction of the instinctual needs subject to the observance of the pleasure principle.


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The Only Illusion Is Division

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Re: 32,711 videos [Re: abltsandwich]
    #15706289 -

abltsandwich said:
Only for myself sorry but if you want to work together I have a great porn star name and some experience.



Likely not gonna happen

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Re: 32,711 videos [Re: Fire Dancer]
    #15706293 -

yeah that definately sounds like an obsession or addiction to porn. i don't know what you should do about that.


what if you have a talk with him about it and how your put off by the fact that he has more porn on his computer then most porno websites or something, and let him know your not happy about it.


possibly could make him an ultimatum or get him to try and cut back on his porn??


i really got no idea about this one


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Re: 32,711 videos [Re: EvolveShrooms]
    #15706301 -

EvolveShrooms said:
Freudian psychology; The id is the unorganized part of the personality structure which contains the basic drives. The id acts according to the "pleasure principle", seeking to avoid pain or displeasure aroused by increases in instinctual tension.

The id is unconscious by definition:

    It is the dark, inaccessible part of our personality, what little we know of it we have learned from our study of the dream-work and of the construction of neurotic symptoms, and most of that is of a negative character and can be described only as a contrast to the ego. We approach the id with analogies: we call it a chaos, a cauldron full of seething excitations... It is filled with energy reaching it from the instincts, but it has no organization, produces no collective will, but only a striving to bring about the satisfaction of the instinctual needs subject to the observance of the pleasure principle.



So could a fear of something makes him want to watch porn more?

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Re: 32,711 videos [Re: Fire Dancer]
    #15706303 -

no, it's mostly just his brain and his testicles


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Re: 32,711 videos [Re: Fire Dancer]
    #15706308 -

No, but chances are he's been doing this for a while, so its a combo of routine as well as the unchecked instinctual desire to discharge sexual energy. We all have to do it, but thanks to his porn obsession, that energy has become much stronger, and even if he wanted to quit, it wouldn't be easy for him.


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The Only Illusion Is Division

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Re: 32,711 videos [Re: Fire Dancer]
    #15706317 -

I don't think a lot of modern psychology really accepts Freudian concepts as concrete anymore, could be wrong about that but it's my understanding.
And it doesn't sound like a porn addiction at all.  It could be a comfort thing, it could be a fantasy thing, it could be that he just wants to jerk it to another girl.  Hurts to hear that I'm sure but it's a lot better than him boning another girl amirite?
As the girlfriend you either need to accept it and deal with it or end the relationship, because if you put your foot down and say NO he's just going to resent it and do it in secret behind your back.  It won't change his habits.  If you honestly think he's going to give up porn I'd call you naive.  Every guy looks at porn, the only difference are the guys that lie about it.

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Re: 32,711 videos [Re: Dosile Kouki]
    #15706318 -

I won't give ultimatums. I really just want to understand where I fit into his idea that he's actually happy. Talking about things is not something he enjoys. I want to give him all the happiness that I can. Talking about things like this without making him feel like he's doing something wrong is difficult. It's not wrong, it just makes me feel sick sometimes, like a middle child jealousy.

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Re: 32,711 videos [Re: Fire Dancer]
    #15706330 -

I would NEVER want him to give it up. I root for watching porn in private. What I am saying is that I feel like I'm getting the shit end of the attention stick. For some reason, I feel like the other woman to his computers.

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Re: 32,711 videos [Re: Fire Dancer]
    #15706349 -

I don't think I've even watched porn 32,000 times let alone 32,000 different videos... all saved to my HD.

If I were a chick I'm pretty sure I'd never date a guy that has that much porn.


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That's me on the street with a violin under my chin. Playing with a grin, singing gibberish.

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Re: 32,711 videos [Re: Fire Dancer]
    #15706403 -

Yikes OP. That's over the top.

On my PC I had some "favorites" videos of Faye Raegan ( Porn star )

My girl saw them and was like "What? My body doesn't look like THAT so you need something on the side?"

I didn't have an answer needless to say. Other than she's beautiful and all I can want.

She said "Delete the porn, stop watching it, please."

No threats, no ultimatum. None of that. I deleted the porn.

For Christmas she bought me a Mac book, and said "Porn free mister. Keep it porn free."

:shrug:

Tell him you hate it. Tell him to stop. Normally I'd be like "ahh, it's just porn"

but this is crazy. That's A LOT of porn. and 2 computers to watch multiple vids at once? Damn.


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IT'S A FISHY!!!!! ----> :fishy:

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Re: 32,711 videos [Re: F0SS1L]
    #15706406 -

its kinda cool he has all that porn but if he spends two hours a day on it then technically all he does in front of a screen is look at pornnnnnn


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http://bunkpolice.com/basic-test-kit/
Vienna Declaration
Salvia Divinorum The Docudrahma

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Re: 32,711 videos [Re: Bundy]
    #15706418 -

It's a lot, yes. I will not tell him to delete it. I want him to have porn. Maybe I will just ask him to leave the motherload at the farm (4hours away) and only keep one laptop here.

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Re: 32,711 videos [Re: Fire Dancer]
    #15706452 -

yea he's probably just fond of having so much access to all that and it's like an information overload to him, you could probably have him set up camp somewhere else tho like under a barn or something...


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http://bunkpolice.com/basic-test-kit/
Vienna Declaration
Salvia Divinorum The Docudrahma

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