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I literally just made my month (PETA beware)
    #10245565 -

Check this out.  I live in a town where woods are pretty scarce but we do have patches here and there.  I happen to live in the middle of one.  i'm literally surrounded by town subtract maybe a square half mile.  we have a HORRIBLE stray, often rabid raccoon and cat problem here.

There has been this coon, I know it is him because he has came the same time every night I've been outside blazing or whatever.  My friend pulls up to, wants to vent and talk.  He's been through a lot so of course I agree.  He parks in my wooded area of the driveway.

Guess who I walk up on in my fucking garbage can straying garbage (we don't throw away food, we have pigs and dogs).  Now I would sympathize if he found food sometimes, but I doubt he's gotten zero nutrients from our plastic coke bottles and cardboard Captain Crunch boxes.

I prepare for battle.

I tell my friend BRB, we are coon hunting mother fucker.

I have an air gun pistol that's rated at like, 420? feet a second.. anyway, well I load it up with 8 pellets (semi auto as fast as you can fire) and we go looking.  He has a deer spotlight btw, plenty of light.  We hear that coon chirp, you hicks know what I am talking about.  We search for 20 patient minutes.  Bingo, a shining single star hiding behind a bush.  I had fired 2 warning shots just to hear him stir, but now he was mine.  Mind you, I am a master shot with this thing as I have practiced many times for moments like this.

Six rounds were fired directly either near his head, neck, or body.  I know I connected because, as sick as this sounds, I watched him lay and cry for a minute before I went and lit a cigarette.



Like I said, the hicks of the world will understand but I hope the pub doesn't flame me too much for this.  I have had a personal grudge against this wild, probably rabid raccoon for well over a month so in my eyes, I did myself and all my neighbors a favor.  At least one damn animal won't dig thru our trash for us to only pick up the next day.

Jesus for those of you that doubted my redneckism I bet there is no doubt in anyone's mind.  I can't wait until hpi reads this lol

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Re: I literally just made my month (PETA beware) [Re: zSDMF]
    #10245607 -

gratz bro


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Check out my gallery :sun:

Do YOU have The Band's sheet music books? I am paying cash!

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Re: I literally just made my month (PETA beware) [Re: zSDMF]
    #10245612 -

coons can be a nuisance.  i don't care anything for hunting, but i totally understand your situation.  i had something digging in my trash years ago.  i couldn't ever catch it in the act so i don't know what it was.  all i know is when he got a little taste of my "special" hamburger meat , he never made it back.

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Re: I literally just made my month (PETA beware) [Re: zSDMF]
    #10245639 -

Why don't you just lock up your garbage? Our neighbors garbage is ransacked by raccoons but ours is always left alone. Why? Because we have a place where it is locked up and they just leave theirs sitting out in the open. You don't have to kill raccoons. And if you're going to shoot the raccoon, you should at least eat it.

Not to mention you should be recycling that plastic and cardboard!

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Re: I literally just made my month (PETA beware) [Re: adrug]
    #10245648 -

rabies ain't no joke...kill that fucker...especially if you have children

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Re: I literally just made my month (PETA beware) [Re: adrug]
    #10245665 -

zSDMF said:
I have had a personal grudge against this wild, probably rabid raccoon for well over a month so in my eyes, I did myself and all my neighbors a favor. 


Quote:


adrug said:
You don't have to kill raccoons. And if you're going to shoot the raccoon, you should at least eat it.


Rabid Raccoons. Delicious. :smirk:


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Re: I literally just made my month (PETA beware) [Re: ElementsToLife]
    #10245673 -

im drooling

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Re: I literally just made my month (PETA beware) [Re: ElementsToLife]
    #10245685 -

He said its probably rabid. In this case, 'probably' means you don't know either way, but are just making an assumption based on certain observed behaviors. I'm not sure what behaviors led him to believe it was rabid though. Send the carcass to the Dept of Natural Resources people and they'll test it.

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Re: I literally just made my month (PETA beware) [Re: adrug]
    #10245688 -

take no chances

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Re: I literally just made my month (PETA beware) [Re: FarBeyondDriven]
    #10245689 -

You should have really skinned it and ate it....I doubt it had rabbies.

Coon skin goes for a few dollars,they make nice hats{especially when you actually shot it and have a story like this hat was diggin in my trash to go along with it} and the meat is not that bad with barbque sauce......I have eaten them before ,might not make a good diet chioce to eat everyday,they are a little greasy,but nothing wrong with one every now and then.

If you kill enuff of them ,they make killer comforters for the bed.


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I love our leaders and the feds ,they are great people and the laws they make help us!:rofl2:

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Re: I literally just made my month (PETA beware) [Re: ElementsToLife]
    #10245697 -

Should of skinned it and kept the coat. Not sure about raccoons tendons, but I've been wanting to make some sinew really badly lately.


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Aaa...E I O Uuu...A E I O Uuu..A E I O uh Uuu..
*Cough* *Cough*
Ooo...U E I O Aaa...U E I Aaa..A E I O Uuuuu...
At first sight, The Perfection of Wisdom is bewildering, full of paradox and apparent irrationality.

Edited by Acaterpillar (04/27/09 11:04 PM)

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Re: I literally just made my month (PETA beware) [Re: adrug]
    #10245711 -

I do recycle.  This retarded mother fucker throws our coke bottles all around too.

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Re: I literally just made my month (PETA beware) [Re: zSDMF]
    #10245720 -

I was coming down from a trip one night and this fucking possum decides to attack me. Like charges at me hissing and biting; bit my shoe. Bad idea on his part. I went in and got my pellet gun and chased after the fucker in flipflops with a flash light and the gun. I shot the thing 9 times (in the head!) before it finally kicked the bucket.

Another time I was on mescaline, sitting on the deck smoking a cigarette. Another fucking possum jumps out of the tree and starts hissing at me. Hurled a brick at it and knocked it off the rail. Not sure what happened to after I hit it, I was too freaked out to look.

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Re: I literally just made my month (PETA beware) [Re: zSDMF]
    #10245727 -

Yeah I live out in the country so I can relate, we have a lot of problems with some of the local wildlife and usually keep a pellet gun just inside the front door :lol:  We've had many fun times sitting in the doorway, trying to stay quiet, and target practicing on the ground squirrels and such.


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Re: I literally just made my month (PETA beware) [Re: adrug]
    #10245729 -

adrug said:
He said its probably rabid. In this case, 'probably' means you don't know either way, but are just making an assumption based on certain observed behaviors. I'm not sure what behaviors led him to believe it was rabid though. Send the carcass to the Dept of Natural Resources people and they'll test it.


We call animal control quite frequently on these raccoons and they do catch them and more times than not they are rabid.  I'm not talking out my ass about that part.

However, rabid or not, to me this was personal.  Not just me, but to all my neighbors.  SOMETHING has been straying trash this past month and nothing has been for the past few before it.


And about skinning it, well, I don't know about all that.  I had already taken my lorazepam and it's pitch black dark and it's getting spider season.  I am going in the woods tomorrow to find his carcass.  If I do find the body (he did eventually crawl away, I know I connected at least 4 times though) I will take pics.

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Re: I literally just made my month (PETA beware) [Re: Gumby]
    #10245750 -

Dude I don't blame you one bit.  Like I said I really am as redneck as they come.  I do have a lot of hippie, chill tenancies but I love guns and I hate wild animals that make more work than needed.  If you guys go google searching, a town called High Springs, FL got in a little shit for our fire department shooting wild chickens.  Yeah, same little hick town.

But by all means, I would have chased him with all my might coming down off a trip, coming up on one, or hell right after a hit of DMT.  I love guns and I love shooting them, especially at animals that threaten/piss me off.


@tpihkal:  how do you think I became such a master shot with this 60$ airgun?  :grin:

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Re: I literally just made my month (PETA beware) [Re: zSDMF]
    #10245754 -

more rabid coons and cats are gonna come for the carcass now.

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Re: I literally just made my month (PETA beware) [Re: zSDMF]
    #10245769 -

Also I would also like to say, if I trust what I shoot is disease free of course I eat it.  I am not a total asshole or animal hater.  I don't kill animals strictly for fun; we really have a rabid raccoon problem here and he damn well could have been infected.  Had it been in daylight, and had I known he was clean, and had I found the carcass, I would have at least cleaned him and kept the pelt and probably gave the meat to whoever wanted it for free.

suburbantoker said:
more rabid coons and cats are gonna come for the carcass now.


I am on probation for another month and a half and in two days I will be done with community service.  From what you say, i'll have PLENTY of target practice :smile:

Edited by zSDMF (04/27/09 11:14 PM)

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Re: I literally just made my month (PETA beware) [Re: zSDMF]
    #10245789 -

i wanna go coon huntin'.


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Re: I literally just made my month (PETA beware) [Re: MFDoom666]
    #10245792 -

:grin:

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