I am a girl and I have herpes. I sometimes tell guys....when i first found out, i told the guy i was with, because i knew i had to...then somewhere down the road i lost my morals, and since people make jokes about herpes all the time, and it is socially unacceptable even though a whole shit load of people have it (pretty sure it's way more than 1/5, but it's not something most doctors test for regularly, you have to ask, and who is going to do that?) I did not have the courage to tell anyone. So it has been a couple years, and my relationships are usually short, because i am feeling guilty the whole time. But I decided I was sick of it, I need a stable relationship, so I told this latest guy the truth (after we had sex, which REALLY fucking sucked)...not the sex, but telling him about it;) . he interruped me as I was explaining more about the virus, to say that he really respected me telling him, and that he has it too. We were never so happy to find out that the person we had sex with had an std! I did it once, and I think it will be easier the next time...but I'm still not looking forward to having to do it. The problem I usually have, is I never know who might be in for a longer relationship....so I think I'm only going to be seeing this person once, and then it turns out we are really good for each other, and it makes it way harder to tell the person after the fact....
As a woman, even if I didn't have this virus, I would be very understanding and respectful of any guy telling me he has an std. Most people at least have friends who have it.....and most people have it and don't know. How about guys? Are they going to be understanding, or are they going to be a bit scared, and immediately go tell their friends? Because honestly that is what the girl's perspective is on this issue. I hope other people can tell the truth about it from a different angle.
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