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The US Air Force garage sale!
    #7473062 -

It eventually had to happen. America elects a sane president, who immediately pulls the troops out of the Middle East and makes a grisly gash in the Defense budget.

Confronted with a low budget and an immense stockpile of hardware your local air force base decides to hold a garage sale. Because you only leave the basement to get more weed, you were last to know so when you finally got there almost everything was already gone.

However, they still have a big pile of Mk 82's





The most commonly dropped "dumb bomb", it measures 87.4 in (2220 mm) in length by 10.75 in (273 mm) diameter. Although the Mk 82's nominal weight is 500 lb (227 kg), its actual weight varies considerably depending on its configuration, from 510 lb (232 kg) to 570 lb (259 kg). It is a streamlined steel casing containing 192 lb (87 kg) of Tritonal high explosive.

Other than being an indiscriminate weapon of mass destruction, there's nothing wrong with it, it was carted from the General Dynamics factory only last year and is fully functional. JDAM kits sold separately.

Because the Air Force wants rid of it they sell them off at cost, $268.50 (actual unit price)

You're stoned, you got the cash, you can get it home on the roof of your buddy's Humvee and you are in a good mood. Will you buy this monstrosity and what will you do with it?

.
Only $268.50 a pop! Will you buy one?
You may choose only one


Votes accepted from 10/01/07 07:40 AM until the end of time
You must vote before you can view the results of this poll



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Omnicyclion.org
personal empowerment for the world

:nyan: LGBT - Love God Before Tradition :nyan:

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Re: The US Air Force garage sale! [Re: Asante]
    #7473066 -

i said probably no. that's a fairly large some of money for something that would be entirely useless to me.

if i were to buy it, it'd only be because i'd be worried it'd fall into the wrong person's hand. if this were the case, then i'd drive out, as far away from civilization as possible, and try to shoot at it from like half a mile away. could take me a while.


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Re: The US Air Force garage sale! [Re: Asante]
    #7473068 -

In case you're wondering: I haven't gone completely mad, it's just that I was reading up on Anarchy, and it dawned on me that in an Anarchy, there would be no sales restrictions on anything.

I then thought up a thing you could buy in an Anarchy but not currently, found it's actual price ($268.50, for real) and the idea for a thread was born.

For those who would buy it, what would you do with it?


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Omnicyclion.org
personal empowerment for the world

:nyan: LGBT - Love God Before Tradition :nyan:

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Re: The US Air Force garage sale! [Re: Asante]
    #7473085 -

I'd definitely buy it. Im stoned right now so i may be wrong, but i'd imagine you'd somehow be able to take the explosives out no? If you could, i would blow something up in the middle of nowhere.


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"Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music." - George Carlin

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Re: The US Air Force garage sale! [Re: DepthToTheCore]
    #7473087 -

I'd buy one and have it disarmed and turned into a badass hooka. :rastamon:

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Re: The US Air Force garage sale! [Re: Asante]
    #7473093 -

Hmm.. my inner child, the pyro kid, would probably nag me to no end to buy one so I guess one would go home with me :yesnod:

In an Anarchy, I'd scoop out the contents and use it for a couple years worth of dynamite fishing, stuffing my freezer with fresh fish and probably selling some off on the fishmarket :lol:

The empty casing would make a nice garden ornament for a nice WTF effect, sticking out amidst the greens.



I see theres a lot of impulse buyers here :lol:


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Omnicyclion.org
personal empowerment for the world

:nyan: LGBT - Love God Before Tradition :nyan:

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Re: The US Air Force garage sale! [Re: Asante]
    #7473096 -

> Other than being an indiscriminate weapon of mass destruction

Sorry, but a 500lb conventional explosive bomb is not a weapon of mass destruction.  :rolleyes:


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Just another spore in the wind.

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Re: The US Air Force garage sale! [Re: Seuss]
    #7473166 -

500 lb. bomb no WMD? Maybe not on its lonesome, but with a couple hundred of its buddies dropped from a B-52 thousands of feet up? Not exactly a precision delivery system, these things would level a town and extract a huge toll on anyone unfortunate enough to be in the target zone.

Also hell yes I'd scoop that mother up. When heavy ordnance starts going on sale, is the same time that the average person might find it useful to have some on hand.

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Re: The US Air Force garage sale! [Re: Life_of_a_Cell]
    #7473206 -

Thats a ridiculously low price.

Imagine the bulk orders the AF must be placing to get deals like that...


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After one comes, through contact with it's administrators, no longer to cherish greatly the law as a remedy in abuses, then the bottle becomes a sovereign means of direct action.  If you cannot throw it at least you can always drink out of it.  - Ernest Hemingway

If it is life that you feel you are missing I can tell you where to find it.  In the law courts, in business, in government.  There is nothing occurring in the streets. Nothing but a dumbshow composed of the helpless and the impotent.    -Cormac MacCarthy

He who learns must suffer. And even in our sleep pain that cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart, and in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God.  - Aeschylus

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Re: The US Air Force garage sale! [Re: Madtowntripper]
    #7473222 -

I always wanted one of those!! I dont know how anyone could live without one


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"Psychedelics should be used not to escape reality, but to embrace it"


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Re: The US Air Force garage sale! [Re: danlennon3]
    #7473245 -

Quote:
I dont know how anyone could live without one



I think in the Middle East they did just fine without em :frown:


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Omnicyclion.org
personal empowerment for the world

:nyan: LGBT - Love God Before Tradition :nyan:

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Re: The US Air Force garage sale! [Re: Asante]
    #7473249 -

Why would I want to buy one?


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Welcome evermore to gods and men is the self-helping man.  For him all doors are flung wide: him all tongues greet, all honors crown, all eyes follow with desire.  Our love goes out to him and embraces him, because he did not need it.

~ R.W. Emerson, "Self-Reliance"

:heartpump:

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Re: The US Air Force garage sale! [Re: WhiskeyClone]
    #7473254 -

Because you can? :grin:


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Omnicyclion.org
personal empowerment for the world

:nyan: LGBT - Love God Before Tradition :nyan:

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Re: The US Air Force garage sale! [Re: WhiskeyClone]
    #7473259 -

i most likely would if i was really baked


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Re: The US Air Force garage sale! [Re: ajdaak]
    #7473312 -

I would by it in an instant. Hell, I'd probably buy two and drive out to the desert with a large stash of AN.

Then again maybe I better just stay home instead. :shrug:


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When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.

Edited by MrKite1 (10/01/07 10:08 AM)

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Re: The US Air Force garage sale! [Re: Asante]
    #7473360 -

It depends on how many are in the pile... If it was a couple, I'd buy them all, in hopes of preventing catastrophe.

If there were 50+, i'd say "fuck it" and go home and smoke a bowl in my basement.


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Re: The US Air Force garage sale! [Re: CureCat]
    #7474752 -

Dude July 4th I'd be the motherfucking King of the Block with that. I'd have to buy it just because when would I have another legal opportunity to purchase a live bomb.


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Hi  :scrambled:

My god... it's full of stars...

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Re: The US Air Force garage sale! [Re: Asante]
    #7474828 -

I'd have no use for it

but my dad made my brother and i carry an amram missle once when I was eight


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channel your inner Larry David

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Re: The US Air Force garage sale! [Re: Asante]
    #7474866 -

fuck yeah I would buy it

I couldn't really use it for anything but damn how many chances could you get to purchase a 500pound bomb?


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"If we could sniff or swallow something that would, for five or six hours each day, abolish our solitude as individuals, atone us with our fellows in a glowing exaltation of affection and make life in all its aspects seem not only worth living, but divinely beautiful and significant, and if this heavenly, world-transfiguring drug were of such a kind that we could wake up next morning with a clear head and an undamaged constitution - then, it seems to me, all our problems (and not merely the one small problem of discovering a novel pleasure) would be wholly solved and earth would become paradise." - Aldous Huxley
:drooling:GIVE ME OPIATES OR GIVE ME DEATH:drooling:

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