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Toddo
Stranger


Registered: 07/09/04
Posts: 4,152
Last seen: 6 years, 5 months
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ahh the social game.
Before I say what qualities I look for.. I'll say a little something about myself.
I'm a quite guy, by nature. As long as I have a few friends I can relate my experiences to, I'm fine. But as far as social ranking.. I was a total failure in high school. I did play of my strengths, which is being able to make random funny comments and making people laugh. (sometimes even at me) but I became a pretty well known person at my high school.. someone who everyone wanted to get "drunk". I felt so stuck in this stupid joker roll. It helped me in the beginning of high school.. but in turned into a curse by the end.
I took full advantage of the opportunity and matured a LOT when I started going to college. I feel like I'm fine in social situations now..like party's or what not. But meeting people can be a little tough some times. I think my general knowledge and witty sense of humor are the points I try to play off of now. But I always have high school to remind me what happens when trying to be the funny guy can turn on you.. (of course this just means dont be an idiot) Qualities I'm drawn to: by far, the first one would be intelligence. If they know whats up, then I try to introduce myself.
I like people who are confident and start up random conversations with people they know nothing about. But confidence, like what everyone else has said, is pretty key. I would like for them to be able to hold their own if I'm going to befriend them.
cool thread!
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Toddo
Stranger


Registered: 07/09/04
Posts: 4,152
Last seen: 6 years, 5 months
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Re: Social status [Re: Toddo]
#6325913 - 12/01/06 10:50 PM (17 years, 3 months ago) |
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woops, sorry for the double post. Not sure how that happened.
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ToTheSummit
peregrinus



Registered: 08/22/99
Posts: 9,126
Loc: Las Vegas
Last seen: 27 days, 14 hours
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Quote:
RandalFlagg said: Women's options are much more limited; they have to be hot in order to rise to the top.
This I don't agree with. While a hot chick can attract attention quickly when she walks into a place it doesn't take long for people to lose interest if she does not have the personality to keep it going. And I've met many average (even homely) women who could dominate a room after an hour or two on personality alone.
I find personality much more important then the looks after you get to talking to a woman. But first impressions are important, and looks can give someone the advantage in the beginning.
-------------------- You invented the wheel....You push the motherfucker!!
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CherryBom
Yoga Gypsy


Registered: 12/26/98
Posts: 11,177
Loc: Ontario
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Quote:
ToTheSummit said:
This I don't agree with. While a hot chick can attract attention quickly when she walks into a place it doesn't take long for people to lose interest if she does not have the personality to keep it going. And I've met many average (even homely) women who could dominate a room after an hour or two on personality alone.
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blissedout


Registered: 11/11/04
Posts: 22,320
Loc: Yonder
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People are all different, but basically made of the same stuff. We all want to be liked in some way, or another. I have met some sad saps, but I have also known some serious prodigies. People have to be either very blessed, or seriously intelligent to rise to the top, but it's all you can hope to do, in the end. Keep hope and enjoy who you are and it will help you to roll with the punches life throws you. ANyway, I don't know exactly where I was going with that, but whatever.
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Edited by blissedout (12/02/06 12:54 AM)
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blissedout


Registered: 11/11/04
Posts: 22,320
Loc: Yonder
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Quote:
NobodyCares said: That's an interesting question. Personally I think that the kind of people who excel in social situations are the kind of people who feel most comfortable and confident participating in them. Because who really seems more approachable, the guy who's moving about the party in a pretty animated manner, or the guy who's sitting in the corner and not really looking anyone in the eye?
I have been like all of theses people, at one point. It all depends on my mood.
People that have good charisma are sometimes naturals at it. Like they were born with a natural grace around just about any kind of person, anywhere. I have always wondered at these people. I have found alot of times, that the people that are the most natural are also very open hearted and kind, as well. Very straightforward, but intelligent enough to not say the wrong thing, ever. Amazing to witness, for sure. I'm babbling now.
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deryl
Stranger


Registered: 10/21/04
Posts: 1,220
Loc: Uncle Tom's
Last seen: 9 years, 5 months
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Quote:
RandalFlagg said:
Quote:
deryl said: your still alive and still have a penis so it couldn't be that bad.
everybody has a bad day, what defines your character is how well you handle a shitty situation and if you can learn from it.
All good points. But, things have a way of cascading and putting you in a spiral of shittiness and maybe even affecting you permanently. Think of sensitive kids who get bullied and become timid because of it. Then, because of their timidity, they get bullied all of the time. Because of this bad treatment by other people they became withdrawn, lose all confidence, and they were like that for the rest of their lives.
Like with me I lost my best friend, got dumped, started dwelling on painful stuff from my past, and came to the realization that I hate what I am going to school for...all at about the same time. This all lumped together and seriously dented my happiness and confidence. I've gotten some of it back but I'm still affected by all of that stuff. It's hard to "pull out of it" sometimes. Real life occurrences have a way of overwhelming a person and shaping their personality. Not everybody is strong enough to fight it and retain their confidence.
I'm not going to lie and say I never get deppressed, sometimes it is very comforting to think the world as you know it might as well end and that you have nothing left to live for.
but, you have got to remember that no matter how hard things get, they will eventually get better.
I'm truly sorry for your friend, but there are some things you just can't control, hindsight is always 20/20 and it may seem like you could have done something to prevent a tragedy, but the reality is that you're only human, everyone makes mistakes, and when faced with a situation as such it's easy to place the blame on yourself. remember the good times and wish well for those you lose.
getting dumped is something noone wants to experience, but virtually everyone will, it happens. sometimes the things you think will be most permanent in your life will change and that can be a shock, but remember that there is plently of options open after you loose a girlfriend. simply put, the best sex i've ever had has been right after I've lost a serious girlfriend, I forgot how great it feels to seduce another girl.
lastly, study something you want too, the only thing anyone has to offer in life is time and experience, you should have plenty of both and it's never too late to start over.
hopefully you'll get out of your funk and realize that there is plently shit that you can still do to make your life worth wild. indifference is one damn thing hard to teach, but it has it's benefits.
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blissedout


Registered: 11/11/04
Posts: 22,320
Loc: Yonder
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This is a damned fine thread with some good reading, Randall. Nice going! You always start some good thought flowing. I hope you stick around for a long while, man. You are some of the glue that keeps this place together.
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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To deryl and blissed:
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blissedout


Registered: 11/11/04
Posts: 22,320
Loc: Yonder
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Social status is a funny thing that an animals adhere to. Humans aren't unique in this, but they are the most obsessed with their social status, I think.
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