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InvisibleTien
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Need...closure? or wtf is going on?
    #4595801 - 08/29/05 07:09 PM (11 years, 3 months ago)

Here is my little story. I'm a big city guy, and I see a lot of good looking girls everywhere alot of the time. A few weeks ago, I was doing a job several hours away from the big city in a township ofMiddle-Of-Nowhere (almost literally..a building surrounded by corn fields). The job was installing windows at school.

Getting to the point, I was walking along a hallway and saw one of those wooden award plaques. This plaque had a picture of this beautiful young girl, underneath were engraved words that loudly spoke "Katelynn Innes Memorial Award". For some reason the picture of this girl and the word "memorial" didn't go together well in my mind. I couldn't beleive that someone so innccent, young, and beautiful be dead. Especially in a lightly populated place like that....what a tragedy. I didn't know what to think or feel. For some reason I felt a very strong connection to this girl for the next little while(nothing sexual or anything). I felt as if I was supposed to have met her, or maybe I was supposed to interfere and somehow save her from her death...I don't know...theres a tornado of these feelings spinning inside of my chest.

Eventually, the grief got heavier and I started doing research on this girl. I've looked on every page on the web that contained her name, and I kept looking, and looking, and looking. I don't know what I was looking for..just needed to find something.

Today, the grief is still here and I am set on beleiving that for some reason this girl should be walking among us...or something. I don't know why, I don't know why. It's bothersome.

There is nothing that I should be looking for...her death was an accident, that's almost undebatable. Katelynn was driving on a highway when a deer took center stage on the road. Katelynn swerved in an attempt to avoid hitting the dear, the truck rolled, she got ejected and was pronounced dead at the hospital. An 18 year old male passanger who was with her got away with non life-threatning injuries. That's Katelynn's story.

..Why me?? Why do I feel such a strong connection to her? What am I supposed to do? I've never even heard of her before in my life...why the hell did I have to find out about her existance when she was already gone?

I don't know what the point of this post is..I just need something..something what?..something I don't know..something..

Rest in peace.
Katelynn Innes of Embro (Oxford County), Ontario
July 28, 1988---November 18, 2004


Pluto


Edited by Plutonium (08/29/05 08:47 PM)


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Offlinebarfightlard
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Re: Need...closure? or wtf is going on? [Re: Tien]
    #4596026 - 08/29/05 08:17 PM (11 years, 3 months ago)

The reason is you. Have your emotions been sensative lately? You had no connecection with this girl other than the fact she was a fellow human. Her death didn't seem right because of her age and that strikes a nerve in most people. I think you just let it get to you.


--------------------

"What business is it of yours what I do, read, buy, see, say, think, who I fuck, what I take into my body - as long as I do not harm another human being on this planet?" - Bill Hicks


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InvisibleTien
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Re: Need...closure? or wtf is going on? [Re: barfightlard]
    #4596119 - 08/29/05 08:46 PM (11 years, 3 months ago)

That's a very good summary. I know for a fact that I just let it get to me..but I don't see a reason for letting it get to me. I have lost several friends of that age when I was younger / and I hear alot about people of that age group dying. Finding out about Katelynn just sort of uncovered a gap that needs to be filled in my soul or in my mind..I can't quite tell. I don't think I've been emotionally sensitive or unstable in the near past..

I don't understand

Pluto


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OfflinePreparationH
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Re: Need...closure? or wtf is going on? [Re: Tien]
    #4597226 - 08/30/05 12:46 AM (11 years, 3 months ago)

i think you just dont like the fact that the innocent die. i'm pretty much the same way. Would you feel anything if you saw a little cute bunny hop accross the road then splat? i'd feel bad about it, you probably would too.


Edited by PreperationH (08/30/05 12:47 AM)


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InvisibleBoom
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Re: Need...closure? or wtf is going on? [Re: Tien]
    #4597415 - 08/30/05 01:28 AM (11 years, 3 months ago)

Something about her seems familier to you? Maybe you were meant to be soulmates....


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InvisibleTien
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Re: Need...closure? or wtf is going on? [Re: PreparationH]
    #4598825 - 08/30/05 02:03 PM (11 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

PreperationH said:
i think you just dont like the fact that the innocent die. i'm pretty much the same way. Would you feel anything if you saw a little cute bunny hop accross the road then splat? i'd feel bad about it, you probably would too.




...yes. Her innocence.
As far as I know Katelynn was one of those good kids...didn't do drugs, she participated in Tug-of-War tournaments, and she was an excellent skater.

It seems as if the people who do get to live for a while are the kind who have something fucked up in their life to figure out. Those of us who have our priorities straight and engage in a good life style go first...something doesn't seem to make sense here.

I think the whole soul mate thing is a bit far fetched Booom, but we will never know now.

I thought of contacting Katelyn's family and telling them how I feel, but that would probably just make me look weird...considering the circumstance under which I found out about Katelyn's past existence. They'd probably think I was obsessed with her or something (sometimes I feel like I am...and its bugging me)

Pluto


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