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Mushrooms, Mycology and Psychedelics > Mushroom Cultivation > Cultivation Confessional
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Re: Cultivation confessional [Re: BeefExtreme] * 1
    #29335328 -

BeefSupremeJr said:
DERRAYLD said:
Too many people have no interest in self-reflecting.

I've made the biggest changes in my life when I focused on reflecting and gaining knowledge from those around me.


everyones perception is so powerful until its directed inward, isnt it?


It is even more powerful when directed inward. Assuming one has the stones to do so.

That's a big part of what has helped fix me. I'm still in disrepair, but I'm working on it.


--------------------
"For the powerful freedom-takers who rob justice from us all, that's why I keep my pistol loaded, powder, cap, and ball..."
Read more, post less!
...turns out, I'm an amateur at everything

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Re: Cultivation confessional [Re: tryptkaloids]
    #29335350 -

tryptkaloids said:
I know, its just something ive noticed about people that ive been trying to do less of.

Everyone is always looking to shift the topic to themselves. Its an interesting part of psychology. Im tryin to be more present with people and not drag my "issues" into their spotlight.


Thanks beef. :hug:


I try to relate or frame advice by sharing my own experiences.


Sup, Klarn! Good to see you! Welcome back to the land of fungi and mold! šŸ˜†


--------------------



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Re: Cultivation confessional [Re: Gilmour Hendrix] * 2
    #29335360 -

Thanks, great to be back from the land of trees, smoked meats, and autists!


--------------------
"For the powerful freedom-takers who rob justice from us all, that's why I keep my pistol loaded, powder, cap, and ball..."
Read more, post less!
...turns out, I'm an amateur at everything

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Re: Cultivation confessional [Re: KlarnEvil9] * 1
    #29335380 -

Sounds like Canada


--------------------
I've got skills, they don't know where to use me
I'm like the best dressed guy at the nude beach
Nice to meet you!

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Re: Cultivation confessional [Re: OLDDAD77] * 3
    #29335496 -

Auto-Summary
This forum post is a passionate plea from an older father seeking advice on helping his brother accept his 6-year-old niece's potential Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS) diagnosis. The author shares their own experiences raising a nonverbal, autistic child with ADHD, OCD, and ODD. They emphasize the importance of accepting a child's challenges and seeking a diagnosis to unlock essential resources and support. The author advises their brother to recognize the difficulties his niece may face and to understand that getting a diagnosis can provide financial assistance and access to specialized education. They caution against denial and blame, suggesting that the child's well-being and future depend on accepting the situation and seeking help. The post concludes by urging patience and understanding, as some may never be ready to accept their child's needs.

.
OLDDAD77 said:
I need some advice from some of y'all that are in the know.

My 6 yr old niece has a developmental delay. Weā€™re pretty sure itā€™s Fetal Alcohol syndrome but my brother is in severe denial and refuses to accept the fact that his daughter has anything  wrong. She got kicked out of a private KG last year. He blamed the teachers. Now sheā€™s on her 7th day of public KG and the teacher has already had to have a meeting about her behavior. Again heā€™s getting defensive and blaming the teachers. Itā€™s like ground hog day.

I know some of you have kids on the spectrum and some of you are in the spectrum yourself. Any advice on helping my brother with his denial would be greatly appreciated.

Full disclosure: heā€™s been a coddled little bitch his entire 39 years of existence. Also is a know it all


 

Wow this got really really long. Sorry in advance.  I really just wanted to give you everything I had in my head on this matter cuz I do have a lot of experience with it.


My son non verbal/autistic/ADHD/OCD/ODD
He's got lots of problems. Physically and mentally.


I was never in denial.  But I immediately realized my own ego and pride wasn't important.  And if  wasn't able to figure that out. Then i would always be the first road block in my own son's life.  How can I expect other to help him and give him the assistance he needs, If im not able to accept that he needs help.

Getting a diagnosis when you have a disability is one of the most important things in the world. It opens all the doors for you and allows you all the assistant you might have never even known was available.

Especially when it comes to being put on permanent disability.which isn't a bad thing. 

Hopefully you can just help your brother see that life is hell when you're in the dark or going through it with your eyes closed. That's what it will be like for his child.

It's time to grow up and take responsibility. For his child. not for making your child this way. Even if which in most cases isn't true but even if they did have something to do with it.  In this case is it true..

Most parents don't have to learn to love their children no matter what and do whatever it takes to make sure they have everything they need.

And then unfortunately there are some that don't get it. And I don't even know why they have children. Unless it was an accident..


I understand there's a lot of guilt and sometimes shame and misunderstanding that comes along with having a child with special needs and disability in some sort of way.

I believe for most of us that's probably normal. But you should not let that take over and Define you or your child.

The more they accept their child the more their child will accept themselves and everyone alike.

I'm sure as a man your brother's probably ashamed or maybe guilty. Thinking if he admits there's something wrong then they have to admit that they're the ones who caused it.

And that he created something that wasn't perfect. Which honestly as I say it doesn't make any sense to me. I made my kid and I know for a fact he's perfect the moment I saw him no matter what might have been "wrong with him"
Because nothing is wrong with him.

Maybe it helped a lot that I have lots of family members in the same situation and I grew up taking care of children with special needs. So I understand how special and perfect my son is and how much of a gift he actually was born with.  not a disability.(autism).

Also im  not saying all the strictly physical disabilities are a gift. But you guys know what I mean

And that's extremely unfortunate. Cuz I know for a fact my son was absolutely perfect no matter what and I love him more than the world itself.

Like I said before some people just don't get it and really shouldn't be parents like DERRAYLD said. 

I feel for you guys so I know what it's like. Before I ever had my child I dealt with this with family members as well. And honestly sometimes there's really nothing you can do. And that's so hard to just sit back and watch somebody you love struggle just because their parents don't have a fucking clue. And you just can't do anything about it.  Ive been there.

Just don't give up try to figure out ways to mention how getting a diagnosis will help them financially in the long run.

sometimes that's all it takes for these types of people they care more about the money than their child and when it comes to saving money. Everybody's on board with that. At least then the child will be getting the help it needs.

My son was in public school. With 30 other kids. It was basically a daycare not a school for him. It was the worst. Not to mention the bullying and dangers of everything else going on in that place.

His diagnosis helped us get him into a special school where the entire student body has a disability of some sort. He gets a teacher that specialized to teach him at his own pace and on his own curriculum.


He went from having no words in his vocabulary to about 15 now over the past few years.

We just know he's going to talk at some point he wants to and it's going to happen. But we also know if we would have left him where he was. We probably still be trying to get him to spit out one word..

Oh man this is way too long. Srry.

That's a really tough situation old dad.  I get it. Unfortunately until your brother decides to figure it all out and some people never do.

You might never be able to help him. All you can do is try to keep helping your niece in any little ways possible that you can.

And maybe your brother and his wife will be able to see on their own positive results happening because of just small changes. And if they can see that and the bigger picture maybe they'll start doing it for themselves.

At this point my advice would be to just start driving in the factor that they can save money that they can get government assistance. that they don't have to pay all the expensive, Sorry extremely expensive shit that comes along with these disabilities and getting the child in the proper place.

And it's even harder and more expensive when you start late. And the kid just continues to suffer for it.

Meaning if they do ever decide they want to get the child help it's going to be so much harder and so many more Loops to jump through than if they would have just started off when she was a baby.

Hope this helps buddy.


--------------------
:hippie::mushroom2:Take it easy. if it's easy. take it twice:mushroom2::mushroom2:
:sporedrop:The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Shroomery:sporedrop:

**A LINK TO EVERTHING**


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Re: Cultivation confessional [Re: callmehippie]
    #29335526 -

Thanks Hippie!

I was looking forward to hearing your take on this.

Appreciate everyone chiming in on this.


--------------------
The Hitchikers Guide to the Shroomery

Sometimes you just have to shut up and color!
~CMS Wilbur

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Re: Cultivation confessional [Re: OLDDAD77] * 3
    #29335533 -

god. you people are just good to the core.


--------------------
The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The OFFICIAL Cultivation Off Topic Discussion

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Re: Cultivation confessional [Re: Gilmour Hendrix]
    #29335536 -

Gilmour Hendrix said:
tryptkaloids said:
I know, its just something ive noticed about people that ive been trying to do less of.

Everyone is always looking to shift the topic to themselves. Its an interesting part of psychology. Im tryin to be more present with people and not drag my "issues" into their spotlight.


Thanks beef. :hug:


I try to relate or frame advice by sharing my own experiences.



I find a lot of neurodivergent people communicate that way. Nothing wrong with it, but sometimes there is no advice, sometimes an attempt to simply relate can come across as making yourself the subject of the conversation.

I was simply gonna make a "i feel you" post but when i realized there was no advice, just me injecting my story into the convo i decided it wasnt helpful.


--------------------
"Remember, kids, the difference between science and screwing around is writing it down" -adam savage
Flowchart for Recommended plan of action.
Learn the tried and true way to grow mushrooms
Use the Damn search engine
After you know what you're doing, take a break 
Pick a book, Make some chips!
Josex said:Don't take the site seriously bro, ain't worth it.
 

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Re: Cultivation confessional [Re: tryptkaloids] * 1
    #29335541 -

your self awareness is stunning sometimes trypt.  particularly for someone so young. 

i was once a lot more inclined to give advice but then realized later, i dont know anything, and can barely help myself. 

best you can do is to be present and carry some stones for your buds when you have a little room in your bag.  i think its ok to try to relate to people to let them know you see them but youre right, its easy to take space away from them that way too.


--------------------
The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The OFFICIAL Cultivation Off Topic Discussion

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Edited by BeefExtreme (09/05/25 05:47 PM)

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Re: Cultivation confessional [Re: LadysKnight]
    #29335545 -

LadysKnight said:
OLDDAD77 said:
DERRAYLD said:
Shit parents, pos dad.

Sorry.

No pity or holding punches when I read shit like this.


Yeah my wife and I feel that too.

I looked up how common the denial in parents is and it was like reading a report about my brother.

Literally everything he does was pointed out in the reports I read.


Some people can't take advice because it feels too much like criticism. These people need to think it's their idea. I'm not good at manipulating people that way, but that's what he needs for her sake.


It's called inception, and it's an art form.


--------------------

The Shroomery Manual
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Dream Interpretation
GCā€™s Ayahuasca Recipe
Free Therapy

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Re: Cultivation confessional [Re: GenesisCorrupted]
    #29335560 -

BeefSupremeJr said:
god. you people are just good to the core.


im assuming u meant to write gay to the core??

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Re: Cultivation confessional [Re: sloug]
    #29335561 -

Its the mushrooms :lol:


--------------------
"Remember, kids, the difference between science and screwing around is writing it down" -adam savage
Flowchart for Recommended plan of action.
Learn the tried and true way to grow mushrooms
Use the Damn search engine
After you know what you're doing, take a break 
Pick a book, Make some chips!
Josex said:Don't take the site seriously bro, ain't worth it.
 

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Re: Cultivation confessional [Re: tryptkaloids]
    #29335568 -

I hate life rn... i think I have covid. maybe flu.

Send distillate so i can make edibles.


--------------------
"Remember, kids, the difference between science and screwing around is writing it down" -adam savage
Flowchart for Recommended plan of action.
Learn the tried and true way to grow mushrooms
Use the Damn search engine
After you know what you're doing, take a break 
Pick a book, Make some chips!
Josex said:Don't take the site seriously bro, ain't worth it.
 

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Re: Cultivation confessional [Re: tryptkaloids] * 8
    #29335588 -

I cried like a baby today. During our first ultrasound. I got to see my tiny little baby that's smaller than my pinky nail. With the little tiny flickering heartbeat.







Omg. It was so fucking hard. Last time we were in that very same room getting the ultrasound it was at month 4 and  we found out that our baby had died. The baby was there but the heartbeat wasn't.



I felt like I was going to pass out. And when I saw that little flickering heartbeat I just lost it.

8 more months and lots more ultrasounds to go. Fuck. Its terrifying.


Next week we get to hear the heartbeat.


I've never been more happy and scared at the same time in my entire life. I'm not sure we can take another loss.

My wife is so strong.

I don't know how she's doing it either.  All I know is we doing it together.


--------------------
:hippie::mushroom2:Take it easy. if it's easy. take it twice:mushroom2::mushroom2:
:sporedrop:The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Shroomery:sporedrop:

**A LINK TO EVERTHING**


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Re: Cultivation confessional [Re: callmehippie] * 3
    #29335600 -

That's some good cultivating there.


--------------------

The Shroomery Manual
Wanna Play?
Dream Interpretation
GCā€™s Ayahuasca Recipe
Free Therapy

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Re: Cultivation confessional [Re: BeefExtreme]
    #29335608 -

BeefSupremeJr said:
your self awareness is stunning sometimes trypt.  particularly for someone so young. 

i was once a lot more inclined to give advice but then realized later, i dont know anything, and can barely help myself. 

best you can do is to be present and carry some stones for your buds when you have a little room in your bag.  i think its ok to try to relate to people to let them know you see them but youre right, its easy to take space away from them that way too.




I agree with both of you. I will say though.  however in lots of instances just the fact that you can relate to somebody helps a lot. It's kind of the basis on any therapeutic type of group.

For example AA.

Lots of people go hand hearv other people's stories and then realize they're not the only ones with these experiences. And it helps take down your guard and accept things a little better.

Sometimes showing a little compassion and stating you understand cuz you've been through it as well even if it doesn't necessarily come with advice. Can be beneficial.

Like tryp said just be conscious not to take over the conversation and try to only make it about yourself.

But yeah sometimes the act of relating to somebody is great advice if those people take it in and are able to make a better situation out of what they have because of it.


I've always had an issue with giving people advice and me feeling like. they feel I'm just a know it  all who's perfect and has been able to get myself out of addiction and other things. Especially if those people think you are "preaching".  Which is what I worry about most. If somebody thinks you're preaching to them they're definitely not listening. Because things are way easier said than done..


--------------------
:hippie::mushroom2:Take it easy. if it's easy. take it twice:mushroom2::mushroom2:
:sporedrop:The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Shroomery:sporedrop:

**A LINK TO EVERTHING**


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Re: Cultivation confessional [Re: callmehippie]
    #29335638 -

Super long advice pt.2. Directors cut. ............

Old dad. Maybe start with the stroller and diapers.  Sounds like your niece is going to need a stroller more often than not.. Possibly a specialized one.

My son's speacilized stroller/wheel chair.

Cost 2 grand.

With  his diagnosis and Medicaid that came along with it. Thankfully we got it for free.

My son is 10 he still wears diapers in the evening time. He wore them all day until about last year. That is one expense we also don't have to ever worry about and it is the best.

If my son ends up needing them for his entire life. at this point in time.they're free for our entire life.

Lots of other things that normal non-disabled children also need fall under this category.

Tell your brother if anything save homself some money. Maybe there's nothing wrong with her but she's a little underdeveloped and not moving along at a normal pace. Which is extremely normal. Some kids just need a change of scenery and a little more attention.

So why not try to take advantage of that and see if you can get the government to pay for her shit even though she "doesn't" need it.

This is where that manipulation comes into play. Make him think he's right and you agree. But there's still ways to take advantage of the system and save himself some money.

Shit. lie to him. say you even tried did it. your kids just for the sake of trying to save money. There's definitely people out there who do that.



And while he's at it why not get the best of the best when it comes to that. If he's able to get his child a diagnosis then that's what he will have available to him. A life that's easier for them and less expensive.
Tax returns are better etc. Just a bunch of bullshit that doesn't really matter. But might change the mind of somebody who cares more about themselves than the child.

Point out all the benefits for them that they will get not your niece. That's the trick.

Every kid needs a stroller. Who cares if they have a disability. So it's not like he's getting it and admitting some things wrong.

And then if you're able to maybe facilitate that. Once they save that money they'll never turn back. And they never have to actually admit anything. even though they really should. It's still detrimental to the child either way.

Fake it till they make it kinda thing.


When you bring it up don't make it seem like anything is wrong with her. Just make it seem like things could be better. As far as I know every parent wants things to be better for their kid in general.


--------------------
:hippie::mushroom2:Take it easy. if it's easy. take it twice:mushroom2::mushroom2:
:sporedrop:The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Shroomery:sporedrop:

**A LINK TO EVERTHING**


Edited by callmehippie (09/05/25 07:23 PM)

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Re: Cultivation confessional [Re: callmehippie]
    #29335640 -

callmehippie said:
I cried like a baby today. During our first ultrasound. I got to see my tiny little baby that's smaller than my pinky nail. With the little tiny flickering heartbeat.







Omg. It was so fucking hard. Last time we were in that very same room getting the ultrasound it was at month 4 and  we found out that our baby had died. The baby was there but the heartbeat wasn't.



I felt like I was going to pass out. And when I saw that little flickering heartbeat I just lost it.

8 more months and lots more ultrasounds to go. Fuck. Its terrifying.


Next week we get to hear the heartbeat.


I've never been more happy and scared at the same time in my entire life. I'm not sure we can take another loss.

My wife is so strong.

I don't know how she's doing it either.  All I know is we doing it together.


:letsgo::letsgo::letsgo::letsgo::congrats::congrats::congrats::happyclaps::happyclaps:


--------------------
The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The OFFICIAL Cultivation Off Topic Discussion

āœø-āœø-āœø

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Shroomery

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Re: Cultivation confessional [Re: BeefExtreme] * 1
    #29335643 -

Thanks bros


--------------------
:hippie::mushroom2:Take it easy. if it's easy. take it twice:mushroom2::mushroom2:
:sporedrop:The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Shroomery:sporedrop:

**A LINK TO EVERTHING**


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Re: Cultivation confessional [Re: callmehippie]
    #29335644 -

thank you for sharing bud


--------------------
The Cultivation Confessional Booth - The OFFICIAL Cultivation Off Topic Discussion

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The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Shroomery

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