Cutting to the point. I'm a very reserved individual who is weird, that said I know how to act and be fun... I'm in my mid-twenties now and I've never had a GF and its slightly getting to me tonight. I would love to trip consectuitive days to make the most of the weekend but it doesn't seem to work. Only once a week is great.
Now while tripping I make all types of facial spaziimngs and generally calm but having a great time. The other night about 30 or more girls were looking at me dancing, while I'm sitting having fun. I just didn't want to dance with them. There was no shyness but at the sametime I didn't want to be weirding them out. That said AGAIN there were so many hot girls who clearly wanted me to do something.
Anyways, I did nothing, so got no one. Then someone came up to me, just hitting me up so i thought, this guy was with her and then hanging out after the clubs closed. This dude starts saying 'your preying on drunk girls' and 'i'll follow you to your home'. I was calm but he clearly had a drunk rage. I didn't think their friends were bright given that they came up to me first, I didn't come onto them. If a girl is coming onto me, of course I'm going to reciporcrate respectfully. They just thought I was annoying, even though I wasn't doing anything to them.
So not having a great time. I really want to get a gf but given my original politically incorrect views I have learnt to accept it won't happen and shrooms have ampliefied my ability to let it go. I do not have hate anymore ever since tripping for the first time. Just some lonelyness, probably not even depression.
I don't feel great but we'll live to another day, or 'a dog has its day'. I just want some girl who I am attracted to, in the same music who wants to trip. But they all want to talk in big groups and I don't find it very interesting. I find it dull, that said I find it very interesting to look at them and smile.
Without being dramatic. overtime I really have lost my ability to want to connect with others, while tripping it helped reignite but at the same time I dont want to talk because tripping is too fun, and if I don't trip, well, theres no point at being at nightclubs if you're not on some substance.
I spent the whole day on the glowup after effects looking for girls to talk too. By jjust going outside and just seeing whats about, but all I see is people who're 'stuck in their heads' and aloof and I don't find them very attractive regardless if they're a 10 or not.
Edited by Anonymous (09/21/24 06:31 PM)
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