spirit_shadow said:

sorry but I have to chime in, you are a beautiful person asante. you and some others on this site truly inspire me. In the realest way. You can do anything if you set your mind to it. just like I tell my girlfriend(who also has a form of body dysmorphia) that all you need is to focus on yourself then all the good people in your life(dont even think about the negative people). do not get discouraged. You have people who support you no matter what <3

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Morel Guy said:

If your intelligent enough you realize that sex is about nutting for a guy.  There's the theory of tantric, which seems off topic.

Tantra doesn't happen very often.  At least for me.  I just cannot handle a lot of stress and anything all too different is a lot of stress.  Perhaps one day I'll be numb enough in all the places that hurt, that I'll be able to feel again.  Which is a sincere hope of mine.

But if you are really intelligent, you won't need to have to do much with others.  Sex is a human need, because we lack tools.  We lack mental devices to deal with our nature.

That's why I'm not against porn.  But as far as relationships with other human beings and females I feel a bit uncomfortable about it.  It seems that sex is a shallow thing with deep needs and lasting impact.  Seems difficult to find someone that is going to put up with my complex mentality.

I just cannot be normal without busting a nut from time to time.  Having a woman control me seems like the thing I've been trying to get away from since day 1.

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Ulfrick said:

depends for me. for more casual "every day" style sex, I'd rather quick and efficient, especially with a partner you know so intimately that you both know what buttons to push to send the other over the edge. mostly cuz who the fuck has time for 2+ hour marathons on a regular basis.

now with a new partner where you are still both exploring each other. or for special occasions where you want to make it a treat for both... awww yeah, lets go for hours.

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Morel Guy said:

That is nice.  Pay it forward.  Go out and get a drink or a burger and leave a tip.

The lady probably thought you were helping her.  What was the free item?  Cause moving sucks!

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