Heya Shroomytoons,
We've been a little quiet lately in lue of what happend to PF but were back on top of the spore biz again and decided to keep T.H.E. going until late spring 04'. Maybe longer.. just depends on what the gov. does next.
So the holidays are upon us once again and its time to spread some Christmas cheer around. Other then our annual Toys for Tots Spore Charity Drive....which is going on once again.
Santa Claus was out test driving his reindeers and was drinking a few to many micro beers when he crash landed on our roof. At first we thought it was a UFO as that has happened before... but then we saw it was Santa. That drunk red bastard actually squeezed his fat ass down our filthy chimmney.. (I didn't mind at first since he cleaned it out on his new red suit).
All was good until his drunk ass started stumbling around the house and breaking shit. My girlfriend was pissed when he broke here new imported ancient Egyptian King Tut vass. That was it... we decided to tackle the fat fucker and force fed him some mushroom choclates.
While in a stupid haze as the dreamy state of euphoraia hit Santa, we decided to pilfer his gift bag and see what he had brought us. Not one fucking exotic ancient ruin mushrooms statue from Mexico, or even so much as a rare spore of an unknown species for all the hard work we have done for mushroom community over the years. Not a single good micro beer worth swallowing..... just some cheap Keystone crap.
Not even a real piece of jewelry, or nice clothes, just some K-Mart Blue Light special left over clearance rack duds. Nothing nice for the house... just some lemon scented toilet paper, as if we want a lemon-e fresh ass!
Santa sat their laughing his silly, red, fat ass off at us as the mushrooms overwelmed him with love and beauty.... as we quickly surrounded him with a circumsicion knife and shotgun ......and our adopted son LITTLE JOHNNIE grabbed some hideen rocket fuel and was ready to torch Santa and start The Burning Man Festival '04 a little early. Santa saw our anger developing after looking at the cheap thrift store crap he brought us and quickly got on his new $3500 Verizon multi-network, multi-country, multi-languege, 4" plasma video screen cell phone and called some elves in for back up.
Those happy little elves had been busy all year growing some fine ass shrooms. They new they had to make us happy quick or Santa was going to be singing saprano real quick after we cut his fat nuts off.
They brought us a whole slew of fine, tasty, cosmo highway, hard hitting, synergy, free spirit mushrooms that rocked our world and some quality spore clouded spore syringes to boot. To many syringes for us to keep around so we decided to give them to you all free with your orders.
So it looks like everything turned out ok after all. Santa got blitzed on shrooms and he saw God. After we almost cap'd his ass and Little Johnnie threated to kill him, he's with the program now and giving out free spores and mushrooms for all those who seek the sacred gift. He wrote us a letter the other day telling us after he widdled a new sled, he took all those wood shaving and started his own ps. azurescen patch. And Mrs. Clause started spreading spores on all the rain deer dung in the backyard and now they have big happy North Pole Cubensis all over the yard. The Magic Elves are going to start their own North Pole spore business soon and they can finally make a decent living to buy them some sexy midget whores. Everyone is happy ....damn what a good Christmas this is going to be 
So where does that leave us... oh yeah.. back to
The Hawks Eye ....well all those spores the elves brought us from those kick ass mushrooms....our payoff to not slay Santa.... well they are yours now.
With every order from now until Dec. 26th we are giving one free spore syringe. Your choice of the p.c. Thailand Koh Samui Super Strain.. only the best cubensis we have ever seen...(pics and video coming soon ... or the p.c. T.H.E. Gulf Coast, the p.c. Ecuador or the orginal p.c. Thailand Koh Samui Classic, our best seller ever. Its your choice...all these kick ass strains that The Hawks Eye was the first to bring to the masses like so many other strains our now in a Holiday Gift package.
Also we have upped the freebies on the larger orders... what use to be buy 4 get 2 free is now 3 free... buy 5 get 4 free.. buy 7 get 5 free...and a whopping.. buy 10 get 10 free, our best deal ever!! Plus your December pick on top of all those freebies.
We have never given up spore syringes so cheap and it will only last another 3 weeks. So get the deals while you can
Oh yeah... back to Little Johnnie... you all know what a little rotten fuck that kid was ... he use to be a homeless kid in the neighborhood .........well we got tired of him pissing on our dogs for kicks..... so we kidnapped his ass and force fed him some mushroom choclates a couple years back. It changed him...he saw some freaky shit that was far more powerful then his devious mind could conjure up..... and realized what a small meaningless fuck in the world he really is. The kid was doing great for a while .... he saw the light... he became a good kid....we adopted him.....until SAnta screwed him over this December .... now Little Johnnie is running rampid again ...we found this letter from Little Johnnie so be aware ....he's on the terror again! He's no longer our responability...if you see him....catch him and give him some mushroom choclates so he can see the BIG PICTURE again. You can walk the streets safe again once he's tamed.
Happy Holidays Everyone
God Bless
Peace and Love
------From------
TheHawksEye.com
--------------------
-Peace-
High Quality MUSHROOM SPORES and CULTURES for microscopy at www.muShrooms.com
muShrooms.com is the new web site of
www.thehawkseye.com
Edited by Ryche Hawk (12/05/03 12:33 AM)
|
Threaded
Previous
Index
Next
Some of these posts are very old and might contain outdated information. You may wish to search for newer posts instead.
Ryche Hawk
jong21 
Edit 
Reply 
Ryche Hawk
1 2 3 all )
StinkyFart_Jr
tom
FungusFarmer
Una