jjbigbuds said:

shLong said:

Yeah, duh...once you enter a multiple year realtionship meeting and befriending people of the other sex is forbidden.

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Yeah, I mean co-workers are one thing. I can't imagine coming home and being like, 'honey, I met this great gal today, she's super cool and fun--she's into fishing and I'm going to take her out on the boat this weekend--I think we may be long time buds."

The more I think about it, the more I can imagine sleeping on the couch.

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I was going to make the same point--"put the shoe on the other foot."  however, that being said, jealousy is bad and not fun. 
I was in a relationship w/a chick that was very gregarious and made friends of both sexes easily. I had no problem w/this. i was invited to hang w/them even. and i would not always go, since i did not share the same interests she had w/these friends. 
but as soon as i spoke to, looked at, was doing something w/a female... every single fucking time.

I made shit crystal fucking clear also, as soon as you feel interested in someone else just say so and i will be happy for you that you are pursuing your own happyness and will happilly step aside w/no friction.  and i do this because i don't want to be fucking your new boyfriend or sharing his splooge pot.  and i will show you the same respect.

amilibertine said:

"I got cheated on so now I prejudge all members of the opposite sex as pieces of shit that cheat, and as a result I'm going to go from one relationship to the next certain that the person I'm with is going to hurt me.  In this way I can prevent said hurt by being a controlling and jealous partner, because that's the only possible way to not get hurt...Except for all those times I've been hurt."




What can you say?  No one that thinks that way will ever be in a relationship with someone they can trust, simply because they don't trust anyone and go into a relationship certain of it's eventual downfall.  That kind of circular logic becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. 

You can think all women are unfaithful all you want, it doesn't make you right.  But if you're carrying the baggage from the last girl who cheated on you into your new relationships it's almost a mortal certainty that you will be hurt again.  A lot of people are scared to end an unhealthy relationship, so cheating becomes an easy way out because it enables them to let you down indirectly and allows them to have someone to try to avoid the pain of the relationships end. 

I feel sorry for anyone who thinks that they can stop someone from hurting them if only they control their partners every move.  That shit is fucking pathetic.

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amilibertine said:

At no time is a threat warranted. If you think that your partner is cheating ask them.  Judge for yourself.  No action you take can prevent someone from cheating, short of locking them in a cage.

You are right, a lot of people do this.  What the fuck does that prove?  A lot of people drink and drive, but that doesn't mean it is the right thing to do. 

I've had both extremes.  A marriage that ended in an affair, and an awesome relationship where I completely trust my girl.  Just because you haven't had one or the other doesn't mean your views are correct.

I don't know you or your story, but I do know your views on women are archaic.  Just because you are in a relationship doesn't mean that your partner is your property.  You have no right to tell them who they can and can't be around or what they can and can't do.  No one is disputing that people cheat.  That's a given.  But to think because your ex(s) cheated on you that somehow you have the right to threaten someone because you are insecure is just high school bullshit.  You don't own anyone, and you have no say in what someone else does.  If you can't deal with it it is YOUR problem, not theirs. 

Maybe instead of giving horrible, misogynistic advice to people you should take a look at what it is about yourself that attracts nothing but unfaithful women?

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Cool story bro.

amilibertine said:

"I got cheated on so now I prejudge all members of the opposite sex as pieces of shit that cheat, and as a result I'm going to go from one relationship to the next certain that the person I'm with is going to hurt me.  In this way I can prevent said hurt by being a controlling and jealous partner, because that's the only possible way to not get hurt...Except for all those times I've been hurt."




What can you say?  No one that thinks that way will ever be in a relationship with someone they can trust, simply because they don't trust anyone and go into a relationship certain of it's eventual downfall.  That kind of circular logic becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. 

You can think all women are unfaithful all you want, it doesn't make you right.  But if you're carrying the baggage from the last girl who cheated on you into your new relationships it's almost a mortal certainty that you will be hurt again.  A lot of people are scared to end an unhealthy relationship, so cheating becomes an easy way out because it enables them to let you down indirectly and allows them to have someone to try to avoid the pain of the relationships end. 

I feel sorry for anyone who thinks that they can stop someone from hurting them if only they control their partners every move.  That shit is fucking pathetic.

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+5 for you