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Original Sensible Seeds Shop: Feminized Cannabis Seeds

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Jack-off Device: Simultaneously Futuristic and Retro
    #14797613 -

They should mass produce these things and install them into prison cell walls. Regular ejaculations have been shown to be anxiolytic and reduces violent tendencies. Once the statistics come out that prove my device calms America's most dangerous criminals (you know, marijuana users and the like), I shall receive the Nobel Peace prize.

Maybe I'm just confused by my weird boner.



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Re: Jack-off Device: Simultaneously Futuristic and Retro [Re: The Whale]
    #14797628 -

:wtf:
I'm not putting my dick into anything that has pistons.


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:blindfury::fried::psychsplit::vaped:

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Re: Jack-off Device: Simultaneously Futuristic and Retro [Re: The Whale]
    #14797633 -

seems like hygiene would be an issue in your theory.

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Re: Jack-off Device: Simultaneously Futuristic and Retro [Re: biff]
    #14797636 -

biff said:
seems like hygiene would be an issue in your theory.


Prison duty often includes janitor work.


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Re: Jack-off Device: Simultaneously Futuristic and Retro [Re: The Whale] * 1
    #14797652 -

sounds like id be face fucking a deaf, dumb, and blind 30 year old cripple.
where do i buy this


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Hiring Writers - http://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php/Number/14785822

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Re: Jack-off Device: Simultaneously Futuristic and Retro [Re: ToastedTubby]
    #14797674 -

As long as it's making those sounds while I shove my junk it I'll for sure get off


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:penis: AMU Q&A Thread :penis:Come Chat About Stand up Comedians


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Re: Jack-off Device: Simultaneously Futuristic and Retro [Re: PeterPanda209]
    #14797698 -

Now we're talking.

I'm thinking of hiring a left-brained Asian fellow to work on the protege, whom I intend to pay only in rice noodles. Mass production will of course commence on good American soil. Since we've learned how to sublimate our sexual desires through the assembly line it's only appropriate that Yankee Doodle machines pump out dick pumps for prison pimps.


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Re: Jack-off Device: Simultaneously Futuristic and Retro [Re: ToastedTubby]
    #14797715 -

PeterPanda209 said:
As long as it's making those sounds while I shove my junk it I'll for sure get off


ToastedTubby said:
sounds like id be face fucking a deaf, dumb, and blind 30 year old cripple.
where do i buy this


:ahahaha::lolsy::awethumb:

Hilarious

But yeah, anything that has pistons or rack and pinion = no dick

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Re: Jack-off Device: Simultaneously Futuristic and Retro [Re: shLong]
    #14797808 -

this thread is full of win :thumbup:


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Re: Jack-off Device: Simultaneously Futuristic and Retro [Re: ToastedTubby]
    #14798092 -

ToastedTubby said:
sounds like id be face fucking a deaf, dumb, and blind 30 year old cripple.
where do i buy this


:lol: Oh dear.  Thats my first real LOL in a while.

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Re: Jack-off Device: Simultaneously Futuristic and Retro [Re: ToastedTubby]
    #14798109 -

:rofl2: :rofl2: this thread


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̸ۨ͜۞̷̛̗̗͉͇̰̅͒ͯͩ̆ͯ̑͘ ̶̖̭ͧ͛ͬ͑ͣͦ̍ͧ͐͟Dolphins of Dank۞̷̛̗̗͉͇̰̅͒ͯͩ̆

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Re: Jack-off Device: Simultaneously Futuristic and Retro [Re: propensity]
    #14798133 -

I would rather have this one, pop in a POV blow job DVD and put a wig on it,  :randy2:


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Re: Jack-off Device: Simultaneously Futuristic and Retro [Re: 4runner]
    #14798169 -

This idea has been used before, not in prisons but in the home, to calm the violent temperament of housewives condemned to menial labor and inadequate appreciation.

Female Hysteria - Nineteenth Century



:sadyes:


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Enlil said:
You really are the worst kind of person.


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Re: Jack-off Device: Simultaneously Futuristic and Retro [Re: Sophistic Radiance]
    #14798185 -

HAHhahHAHHAHHAhhahahahHAHHa

That video made made my day.


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Re: Jack-off Device: Simultaneously Futuristic and Retro [Re: PurpleKush]
    #14798191 -

PurpleKush said:
:wtf:
I'm not putting my dick into anything that has pistons.


:rofl: quote of the day


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Re: Jack-off Device: Simultaneously Futuristic and Retro [Re: realfuzzhead] * 4
    #14798889 -


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Re: Jack-off Device: Simultaneously Futuristic and Retro [Re: Yacub]
    #14798896 -

:lolsy:


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Enlil said:
You really are the worst kind of person.


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