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Unfolding Nature Shop: Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order

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Sound of silence
    #10774307 -

Just a thought that popped into my head. How silent are you normally...? Can you be silent in a casual setting?

How long can you sit in silence with another person....say, in a car, or on your couch. Do you feel like you have to talk often, or are you comfortable with silence? Does it get more awkward the longer nothing goes said?

For me I'm perfectly fine not saying anything if there is music or a movie going on. If its just plain silence...I usually feel like I should start up a conversation or else it seems awkward. But when you think about it...why should it necessarily be awkward? Half the time when you start a conversation its usually not about anything important...baseball game the other day, movie you saw sometime, something you did yesterday. Plus your silent when your alone anyway and its not awkward...why should it be when someone else is there? Maybe the other person just wants to chill and think too.

Personally, I'm not that great of a conversation starter, but its a skill I'd like to work on. Most of the time I feel like people think it strange if you start talking about stuff like the human psyche, the universe, scientific concepts, existence, philosophy, etc. So I don't usually do it...but maybe i should.


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Word to your mom.

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Re: Sound of silence [Re: BrainChemistry]
    #10774315 -

It depends on the person I'm with.  If I'm not good friends with them silence seems awkward, but with some friends you just don't even have to exchange words, ja know? :macdre:


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No statements made in any post or message by myself should be construed to mean that I am now, or have ever been, participating in or considering participation in any activities in violation of any local, state, federal, or fashion police laws. All posts are works of fiction.

For well you know that its a fool who plays it cool
By making his world a little colder.

Under closer inspection I realised it was a funky ball of tits from outer space.


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Re: Sound of silence [Re: BrainChemistry]
    #10774325 -

I couldn't talk about any deep stuff to my friends except for maybe one or two.

Not that I'm a deep thinker but I do have deep thoughts from time to time.

I can get into philosophical rants when I'm at a certain level of drunk too.

I can sit in silence with people I'm comfortable pretty easily but with others I can just feel the tension,esp people I don't get on with or am not familiar with.


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Re: Sound of silence [Re: circularvortex]
    #10774351 -

circularvortex said:
It depends on the person I'm with.  If I'm not good friends with them silence seems awkward, but with some friends you just don't even have to exchange words, ja know? :macdre:


Yeah thats definitely true. I've taken some long road trips with a friend i've known for 6+ years and we will go hours in the car without saying anything sometimes. Although usually one of us is dozing off...and there is always music.

But i know what you mean. When you understand someone so well its not like you have to hear them talk all the time, you already comfortable with them.


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Word to your mom.

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Re: Sound of silence [Re: BrainChemistry]
    #10774364 -

I live with my friends, and unless I'm hanging out with them downstairs causing raucous laughter throughout the neighborhood, then I'm usually upstairs in the confines of my own room reading a good book or creating artwork....so otherwise pretty mute


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“I, as a responsible adult human being, will never concede the power to anyone to regulate my choice of what I put into my body, or where I go with my mind. From the skin inwards is my jurisdiction, is it not? I choose what may or may not cross that border. Here I am the customs agent. I am the coastguard. I am the sole legal and spiritual government of this territory, and only the laws I choose to enact within myself are applicable” - Alexander Shulgin

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Re: Sound of silence [Re: BrainChemistry]
    #10774372 -

I'm totally comfortable in silence. I always think its funny when I'm with somebody who's not, then they try to think of something to say.  Thats just me though.


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Push th' little daisies and make 'em come up.

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Re: Sound of silence [Re: LivioDoubleFang]
    #10774423 -

I refrain from talking unless there's something to talk about -- honestly, I wish more people would do the same.

I fucking hate it when someone starts telling you about something that happened to them, just to tell you something that happened to them: like "I was in the store and I was buying blah blah fuckin' blah and this woman fuckin' blah blah blah then I was like LOL!"
It traps me into listening to that shit, and then at the end the least awkward thing I can do is fake a laugh. FAKE a laugh! Call me crazy for thinking about this so much, but to me that's one of the most depressing things there is.
Faking laughter?
Laughter, real laughter, is wonderful -- spontaneous joy noises: unambiguous, pure communication of happiness. We shouldn't have to fake that. We shouldn't try to extract that out of other people, nor should we feel that we "owe" it to others. Every time I have to fake a laugh I die a little, for real. This is what we've come to?

IDK, forgive the rant. Anyway, I agree: there's nothing wrong with comfortable silence.


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Weedmaster P knows the truth.

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Re: Sound of silence [Re: BrainChemistry]
    #10774482 -

i am silent most of the time.  i usually wait to be approached or asked a question before i offer anything at all.

i have a strong dislike for inane conversation.. if it's not necessary to say, just don't say it.

a long time ago, i remember reading a snippet from some metaphysical/psychological text that suggested to not talk most of the time and just listen.. the universe will show you more when you are not constantly butting in.

..or something to that effect.

i am quite content in silence, and i wish more people were the same.


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:poison::poison:                                  :poison::poison::poison:                                  :poison::poison:

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Re: Sound of silence [Re: BrainChemistry]
    #10774496 -

BrainChemistry said:
Most of the time I feel like people think it strange if you start talking about stuff like the human psyche, the universe, scientific concepts, existence, philosophy, etc. So I don't usually do it...but maybe i should.


I know what you mean here. I say just go for it. Sometimes I come out with some deep, not your everyday type shit, and some people can't hang but I finish my thought anyways. I think it's kind of funny, and I enjoy bringing up thoughts to people that wouldn't think of them otherwise. It's good shit.

Like most have said, it depends on the person. With close friends nothing needs to be said sometimes. With new people sometimes it gets a little awkward, but that's just a flaw in one or both of your personalities I think.

Silence should be harnessed.


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“I have lived on the lip of insanity, wanting to know reasons, knocking on a door. It opens.
I've been knocking from the inside.” - Rumi

“The nitrogen in our DNA, the calcium in our teeth, the iron in our blood, the carbon in our apple pies were made in the interiors of collapsing stars. We are made of starstuff.” - Carl Sagan

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Re: Sound of silence [Re: Frost]
    #10774641 -

I have no fear of silence.

The Way of the Samurai said:
The most important way of expressing one self is to say nothing. If we wish to go on without speaking it is easy to do so. When we must by all means say something, we should speak reasonably using few words. We are abandoned by others and disgrace ourselves putting our words carelessly.


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Re: Sound of silence [Re: BrainChemistry]
    #10774746 -

BrainChemistry said:
Just a thought that popped into my head. How silent are you normally...? Can you be silent in a casual setting?

How long can you sit in silence with another person....say, in a car, or on your couch. Do you feel like you have to talk often, or are you comfortable with silence? Does it get more awkward the longer nothing goes said?

For me I'm perfectly fine not saying anything if there is music or a movie going on. If its just plain silence...I usually feel like I should start up a conversation or else it seems awkward. But when you think about it...why should it necessarily be awkward? Half the time when you start a conversation its usually not about anything important...baseball game the other day, movie you saw sometime, something you did yesterday. Plus your silent when your alone anyway and its not awkward...why should it be when someone else is there? Maybe the other person just wants to chill and think too.

Personally, I'm not that great of a conversation starter, but its a skill I'd like to work on. Most of the time I feel like people think it strange if you start talking about stuff like the human psyche, the universe, scientific concepts, existence, philosophy, etc. So I don't usually do it...but maybe i should.



Are you in my principles of management class at SMC?


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Re: Sound of silence [Re: Neuron]
    #10774775 -



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Re: Sound of silence [Re: BrainChemistry]
    #10774784 -

I have a problem where I am never silent, not even by myself.  I don't mean physically speaking, I mean that my mind is never silent.  It sucks, I'm in a funk right now.

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Re: Sound of silence [Re: NastyDHL]
    #10774905 -

I don't speak usually unless I have something at least half relevant to say. Because of this, people who know me casually in something like a work place setting always say I'm really quiet and it seems strange to them. This makes me somewhat annoyed, because most of their conversations have no substance and are just inane chit chat about nothing. More people need to learn to shut the hell up.

People behave like computers. They have certain idiosyncrasies that define their mode of communication, and they fall into these whenever they talk. So if they aren't really talking about anything (which is a lot of the time,) they are just running over the same ground over and over again. The same little comments, jests and jokes - all to ease the tension that comes from silence.

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Re: Sound of silence [Re: Neuron]
    #10775682 -

Neuron said:
Are you in my principles of management class at SMC?


Nah I live in colorado...but thats pretty hilarious about that topic in your class. How random is that huh?


Tranquil Toad said:
People behave like computers. They have certain idiosyncrasies that define their mode of communication, and they fall into these whenever they talk. So if they aren't really talking about anything (which is a lot of the time,) they are just running over the same ground over and over again. The same little comments, jests and jokes - all to ease the tension that comes from silence.


Thats definitely a good analogy and I know exactly what you are talking about. There always those people who just seem like they are on repeat. I guess it just shows that once you get into one mode of thinking, it sort of develops as part of your personality.

It can also be more than that....like there are people who ALWAYS feel like the have to control the conversation...or theres that person that ALWAYS make the sarcastic comment, or responds only in short brief comments.

Its interesting to wonder how much of your responses are just simply preprogrammed.....some people's probably are more than others. I know a few people who seriously can't say a single sentence without saying "dog" or "chill" or "homie" or "bro".


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Word to your mom.

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Re: Sound of silence [Re: BrainChemistry]
    #10775789 -

BrainChemistry said:
Its interesting to wonder how much of your responses are just simply preprogrammed.....some people's probably are more than others. I know a few people who seriously can't say a single sentence without saying "dog" or "chill" or "homie" or "bro".


Its good to watch your own speech and see when you are falling into these patterns. I know I do it, mostly unconsciously. I deliver pizza, and with pretty much every person I meet at the door I will lapse into pre-programmed rhetoric.

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Re: Sound of silence [Re: BrainChemistry]
    #10775803 -

People can't stand the fact that I barely say a word.
When I'm by myself I talk often, but around people I just can't do it.


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North to the future is our motto I'm still up north no future to follow
We do these things and we don't give a fuck, we fire up a blunt in the car bumping Cougnut.

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Re: Sound of silence [Re: Boutang]
    #10775977 -

Boutang said:
People can't stand the fact that I barely say a word.
When I'm by myself I talk often, but around people I just can't do it.


That sounds a lot like insanity, dude.


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Weedmaster P knows the truth.

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Re: Sound of silence [Re: laserpig]
    #10776146 -

I am often stoic and reserved but I am also very active and put myself out there pretty often to meet different/new people through school, capoeira, etc. Normally I'm extremely self reliant and prone to be a lone wolf, but occasionally it is very nice to call up my girlfriend or any other friend to just chill, smoke a bowl, catch up, whatever..

I've decided that being awkward or recognizing something as awkward silence is kind of a choice, if you feel that showing some shining beaming enthusiasm for picking other peoples brains is an important aspect of your humanity, feel free. If you have nothing to say, learn from that. Observe your surroundings. Sometimes though, it's more relaxing to not give a fuck. :shrug:

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Re: Sound of silence [Re: BrainChemistry]
    #10776300 -

LOL

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Unfolding Nature Shop: Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order

Community > The Pub
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