Home | Community | Message Board

MagicBag Grow Bags
This site includes paid links. Please support our sponsors.


Welcome to the Shroomery Message Board! You are experiencing a small sample of what the site has to offer. Please login or register to post messages and view our exclusive members-only content. You'll gain access to additional forums, file attachments, board customizations, encrypted private messages, and much more!

North Spore Shop: Cultivation Supplies

Jump to first unread post Pages: 1
Its cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey
    #9566715 -

DID YOU KNOW THIS?

  It was necessary to keep a good supply of cannon balls near the cannon on old war ships. But how to prevent them from rolling about the deck was the problem. The best storage method devised was to stack them as a square based pyramid, with one ball on top, resting on four, resting on nine, which rested on sixteen.
  Thus, a supply of 30 cannon balls could be stacked in a small area right next to the cannon. There was only one problem -- how to prevent the bottom layer from sliding/rolling from under the others.
  The solution was a metal plate with 16 round indentations, called, for reasons unknown, a Monkey. But if this plate were made of iron, the iron balls would quickly rust to it. The solution to the rusting problem was to make them of brass - hence, Brass Monkeys.
  Few landlubbers realize that brass contracts  much more and much faster than iron when chilled. Consequently, when the temperature dropped too far, the brass indentations would shrink so much that the iron cannon balls would come right off the monkey.
  Thus, it was quite literally, cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey. And all this time, you thought that was just a vulgar expression, didn't you?


--------------------
Time is the Greatest Truth, Life is the Biggest Lie

BELIEVE


It's Gonna Get Fuckin' Ugly!

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Re: Its cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey [Re: Mad Merlyn]
    #9566730 -

Trivial shit like this I eat up.  I'm going to go rape my coworker's ears tomorrow with this gem. :smile:


--------------------
"I sat on the bus next to God once,
he told me about the true meaning of life...
then he gave me a pretzel..."

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Re: Its cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey [Re: License_to_Chill]
    #9566773 -

I got a ton of them:D


--------------------
Time is the Greatest Truth, Life is the Biggest Lie

BELIEVE


It's Gonna Get Fuckin' Ugly!

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Re: Its cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey [Re: License_to_Chill]
    #9566775 -

I was hoping for something sick and twisted.


--------------------

Song of the week, click Huey:



Song of the week list in journal.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Re: Its cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey [Re: Mad Merlyn]
    #9566817 -

That funky monkey!

Quote:
I got a ton of them



Well let's hear 'em!  I also have a knack for remembering this type of nonsense.


--------------------


I am become death, the destroyer of worlds.

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Re: Its cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey [Re: thedefone]
    #9566884 -

Away in the forum we go!

You gotta share too.


--------------------
Time is the Greatest Truth, Life is the Biggest Lie

BELIEVE


It's Gonna Get Fuckin' Ugly!

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Re: Its cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey [Re: Mad Merlyn]
    #9566895 -

Wiki said:
One theory, of sufficient popularity as to be an example of so-called folk etymology, is that a brass monkey is a brass tray used in naval ships during the Napoleonic Wars, for the storage of cannonballs, piled up in a pyramid. The theory goes that the tray would contract in cold weather, causing the balls to fall off. [7] This theory is discredited by the US. Department of the Navy[8] and the etymologist Michael Quinion and the OED's AskOxford website[9] for five main reasons:

  1. The Oxford English Dictionary does not record the term "monkey" or "brass monkey" being used in this way.
  2. The purported method of storage of cannonballs ("round shot") is simply false. Shot was not stored on deck continuously on the off-chance that the ship might go into battle. Indeed, decks were kept as clear as possible.
  3. Furthermore, such a method of storage would result in shot rolling around on deck and causing a hazard in high seas. Shot was stored on the gun or spar decks, in shot racks—longitudinal wooden planks with holes bored into them, known as shot garlands in the Royal Navy, into which round shot were inserted for ready use by the gun crew.
  4. Shot was not left exposed to the elements where it could rust. Such rust could lead to the ball not flying true or jamming in the barrel and exploding the gun. Indeed, gunners would attempt to remove as many imperfections as possible from the surfaces of balls.
  5. The physics do not stand up to scrutiny. All of the balls would contract equally, and the contraction of both balls and plate over the range of temperatures involved would not be particularly large. The effect claimed possibly could be reproduced under laboratory conditions with objects engineered to a high precision for this purpose, but it is unlikely it would ever have occurred in real life aboard a warship.




I always hate to bring reason into the face of a good story but its the same theory behind the origin of the middle finger. Tons of explanations and stories however most discredited.(my personal favorite is the archers taunting french soldiers with middle fingers indicating they can still "pluck you" - pluck eventually descends to fuck etc. Still really neat though.

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Re: Its cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey [Re: Irdamage]
    #9567637 -

The word "Fuck" actually came under I believe Henry VIII and was the acronym for the consensual fornicating inside of the kings kingdom.
The actual "license" you could call it was the License to Fornicate Under a Consensual King, and thus the word FUCK was born.

Cannot however back this up with anything found online that I can find, every time you type the word Fuck into a search engine all you get in return are Pornographic hits.


--------------------
Time is the Greatest Truth, Life is the Biggest Lie

BELIEVE


It's Gonna Get Fuckin' Ugly!

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Re: Its cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey [Re: Mad Merlyn]
    #9567668 -

Naw, it's far older than that and probably comes from old German.

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Re: Its cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey [Re: Le_Canard]
    #9567903 -



--------------------
Time is the Greatest Truth, Life is the Biggest Lie

BELIEVE


It's Gonna Get Fuckin' Ugly!

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Jump to top Pages: 1

North Spore Shop: Cultivation Supplies


Similar ThreadsPosterViewsRepliesLast post
* Damn It`s Cold...brrr brrr freezing
( 1 2 all )
OldSpice 2,602 23 11/24/03 06:15 PM
by Fritzs_caindealer
* Coldness Jaredo 972 7 11/23/03 02:04 AM
by RedNucleus
* Get 120MPG: Cryogenically freeze your car!
( 1 2 all )
DNKYD 1,903 22 06/02/05 12:16 AM
by felix
* It's cold in here... CherryBomM 632 7 11/23/04 08:24 AM
by beejay
* Brass-Eye: Drugs cybrbeast 2,399 3 05/03/06 05:52 AM
by cybrbeast
* I am thinking of buying a Ball Python or a Corn snake
( 1 2 3 all )
quarkyquasar 6,796 46 10/25/04 06:40 PM
by Kinderfeld
* The How Cold Is It Where You Live Thread......
( 1 2 all )
PawPaw 2,332 32 12/24/04 08:40 AM
by Adom
* BRRRR its cold out!!! baraka 684 13 12/20/04 07:56 AM
by OneMoreRobot3021

Extra information
You cannot start new topics / You cannot reply to topics
HTML is disabled / BBCode is enabled
Moderator: Entire Staff
1,296 topic views. 4 members, 53 guests and 116 web crawlers are browsing this forum.
[ Show Images Only | Sort by Score | Print Topic ]
Search this thread:

Copyright 1997-2026 Mind Media. Some rights reserved.

Generated in 0.026 seconds spending 0.006 seconds on 14 queries.