It sounds to me like he's on a power trip. If he doesn't want to have sex with you, why would he object to your pleasuring yourself? His snarky comments regarding your sex drive are not cool, either. Perhaps he feels defensive about not being "the man" in your sexual relationship?
If you do not want to end this relationship, I would recommend taking your power back. Your sexuality belongs to you, not to your boyfriend. If you want to pleasure yourself, do it! If he objects, tell him to FUCK OFF. Stop seeking sex from him, and let him come to you. Object to his snarky comments, but phrase it as "I don't like it" not "You better stop that."
Remove yourself from the dependent position by taking responsibility for your sex life. If he is not interested in participating in that sex life, so be it. Only you can decide whether you are OK with the conditions of your relationship.
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