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Shop: Myyco.com Golden Teacher Liquid Culture For Sale   Unfolding Nature Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order

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Post your retarded stoner epiphanies
    #4785262 -

You know, when youre blitzed out of your mind on the computer, and you think/say really stupid shit. Here are a few of mine, they are really lame and don't make sense, but that's the point. :o

zaphod90 (12:18:12 AM): dude
zaphod90 (12:18:16 AM): you know when deaf people try and talk
zaphod90 (12:18:20 AM): and their speech is garbled?
zaphod90 (12:18:26 AM): i bet thats how they actually osund in their brain..
zaphod90 (12:18:35 AM): its like a different font
zaphod90 (12:18:36 AM): lol
zaphod90 (12:18:42 AM): but for sounds and not text

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zaphod90 (11:24:16 PM): hey
zaphod90 (11:24:16 PM): hey
zaphod90 (11:24:25 PM): whats up
zaphod90 (11:24:25 PM): whats up
zaphod90 (11:25:02 PM): lol
zaphod90 (11:25:05 PM): oh shit bro
zaphod90 (11:25:15 PM): help!
zaphod90 (11:25:31 PM): lol
zaphod90 (11:25:31 PM): oh shit bro
zaphod90 (11:25:31 PM): help!
zaphod90 (11:25:37 PM): o sweet dood i thought you died
zaphod90 (11:25:37 PM): o sweet dood i thought you died


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"The worst mistake that you can make is to think you're alive when really you're asleep in life's waiting room."

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Re: Post your retarded stoner epiphanies [Re: Limelight]
    #4785275 -

its always fun talking to yourself...

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Re: Post your retarded stoner epiphanies [Re: Limelight]
    #4785713 -

[23:39] * ChanServ sets mode: +o Absolute^Zero
[23:39] <Absolute^Zero> fucking connection
[23:39] <oDin> AZ
[23:39] <Absolute^Zero> taco... my pc crashed while i was checking out your balls, mind sending me the link again?
[23:39] <Absolute^Zero> hey odin
[23:39] <oDin> wtf
[23:39] <Vampire999> ummmm
[23:39] <oDin> actually i dont want to know
[23:39] <Absolute^Zero> haha, not like it sounds
[23:39] <oDin> no no
[23:40] <oDin> no need to explian
[23:40] <Vampire999> no expliantion required
[23:40] <oDin> its the 21st century
[23:40] <Vampire999> you were just checking out some doods balls
[23:40] <adrug> taco's balls
[23:40] <vivid> no less
[23:40] <Absolute^Zero> right
[23:40] <oDin> toco taco
[23:40] <adrug> taco can do some crazy shit with his balls
[23:40] <adrug> check it out
[23:40] <Absolute^Zero> nevermind... found them


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Re: Post your retarded stoner epiphanies [Re: absolute zero]
    #4785730 -

hahaha wtf


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"The worst mistake that you can make is to think you're alive when really you're asleep in life's waiting room."

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Re: Post your retarded stoner epiphanies [Re: Limelight]
    #4785850 -

WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!


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Re: Post your retarded stoner epiphanies [Re: swiftrance]
    #4785878 -

Not really in text, but this just happened to me and I think you gotta be a stoner to understand....

So we just got done smoking some pretty good stuff, and I walked out on the balcony to go downstairs and do some laundry. All of a sudden, I see all horizontal lines in my vision. Like, 30 of them across across my vision. It reminded me of some visuals
i get on acid or especially that fucking AMT sometimes. I stopped and leaned against the wall for a minute and then realized it was just the light from each story of the building shining through the balcony bars....

Fuck....


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After one comes, through contact with it's administrators, no longer to cherish greatly the law as a remedy in abuses, then the bottle becomes a sovereign means of direct action.  If you cannot throw it at least you can always drink out of it.  - Ernest Hemingway

If it is life that you feel you are missing I can tell you where to find it.  In the law courts, in business, in government.  There is nothing occurring in the streets. Nothing but a dumbshow composed of the helpless and the impotent.    -Cormac MacCarthy

He who learns must suffer. And even in our sleep pain that cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart, and in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God.  - Aeschylus

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Re: Post your retarded stoner epiphanies [Re: Limelight]
    #4786334 -

I WUZ ALL LIEK OMG I CAN THINKER BETTA STRAIGHTZ.

The I got sober and read a book.

^_^


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Re: Post your retarded stoner epiphanies [Re: HELLA_TIGHT]
    #4786363 -

I got 2 things to share

well once after smoking the hell out of a water bong with pretty good bud, I was sitting on my friends couch and it was a beautifull day. The birds were chirping and nature was making all its sounds, and his door was open so I could hear them. It felt like all the birds and sounds of nature were right beside my ear, like I was sitting right next too a bird, but there was this white noise along with it, this fuzzy static. Then my friend who was tryin to hook up a game cube said something to me and it sounded really far away. That lasted for a long time, until I got up off the couch in fact.



another thing that I think is hallarious is..
We had bought some really nice nugs and went on a high ride and smoke like 4 fat bowls. When we got back we went to hang out infront of the dorm where everyone sits and smokes cigs. There was about 10 people out there smokin. We sat down on the bench and realized we didnt have a lighter. I dont smoke so I told my friend I was going in. He stayed out there. Later he told me..He started laughing outside and couldnt stop laughing, so he stood up and went to stand in a corner. He just stood there laughing, and people were like "is that kid crying" and he eventually just ran into the building laughing.

haha good times


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TRUMP 2020

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Re: Post your retarded stoner epiphanies [Re: XUL]
    #4786397 -

It would have been even more funny if he pissed in the corner while laughing like a mad man!


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Re: Post your retarded stoner epiphanies [Re: HELLA_TIGHT]
    #4786421 -

man this kid is no longer a tweaker, but man one time he had a party at his house.. and wow, he fuckin amazed me.

He was so stoned and so drunk, he got up off the couch and walked over to his kitchen and took a piss right smack on the floor. I was like... wat the fuck just happened here. :wink:


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TRUMP 2020

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Re: Post your retarded stoner epiphanies *DELETED* [Re: HELLA_TIGHT]
    #4786428 -

Post deleted by blinkidiot

Reason for deletion: Im sorry



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Re: Post your retarded stoner epiphanies [Re: blink]
    #4786452 -

hah


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Re: Post your retarded stoner epiphanies [Re: blink]
    #4786460 -

That reminds me of the time i was stoned and driving for the first time.I was driving and my friend riding shotgun. These two girls where getting in the back i thought they where already in so i took off and one of them just had one foot in the car and one on the ground so she pivoted and hit the wheel fender area then fell flat on her face :rofl2: I felt like crap and was apologizing but everyone was laughing there ass off.

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Re: Post your retarded stoner epiphanies [Re: buckwheat]
    #4786530 -

My roomate and me were wasted, and went out to my car to smoke in it.
Then we went back outside of the building to smoke a cigarrete. 
My RA was standing outside as my roomate proceeded to lean against
the brick wall while I was having a conversation with the RA. 
As we're bullshitting, my friend starts slowly sliding down the wall.
We all stop talking and just stare at his drunk/stoned ass unable to stop
himself from slowly sliding down the wall.  :confused:


Yeah it was uncomfortable, as this wasn't the coolest RA in the building :lol:

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Re: Post your retarded stoner epiphanies [Re: Limelight]
    #4786596 -

One time, I did something stupid...

I was stoned, waiting for my gf to come over, right? so, I jump in the shower, when all of a sudden, someone starts knocking on my door... Now, you see, the normal person would have checked the peephole, but I was obviously not in the right state of mind... Well, I just assumed that it was her and so I got out of the shower, went directly to the door, and just opened it up to let her in...

Turns out, it was my new neighbor and he saw my wang, and was just like "oh shit..."

We never spoke again  :grin:


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Re: Post your retarded stoner epiphanies [Re: absolute zero]
    #4786614 -

Once when we were younger. We got super stoned and made a whole jar of napalm using gasoline and Styrofoam.

Then we would twist it on the end of sticks and flail them around, fire spitting in every direction. At one point my shoe caught on fire for a second, lol. We FUCKED up the street and my friends driveway with sticky burnt napalm. To wrap it all up, we spread of the rest of it in a big circle in the road and lit it, so we had this huge ring of fire in the middle of the street. Then everyones like "dude you're not down to throw the rest of the gasoline on it!!!"

So I did.

BOOM. We had a bonfire in the street about 7 feet high for a few seconds.

Had to grab the garden hose to get that shit out :lol:

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Re: Post your retarded stoner epiphanies [Re: Trainwreck]
    #4786635 -

My bro was all "DUDE, YOU'RE GETTING A DELL!"


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Re: Post your retarded stoner epiphanies [Re: HELLA_TIGHT]
    #4786645 -

Strike 3, hella.

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Re: Post your retarded stoner epiphanies [Re: Trainwreck]
    #4786700 -

Me and my bro in law were sitting on his front porch saturday night, burnin some Bubba Kush,and some bubble hash,when I get a call from a buddy of ours. He's a Limo driver, and he asked if we wanted to take a ride in the double stretched limo. So we go, and he has to stop and get gas. My bro was messing with the radio, and finally figured out how to work it, when the village peoples YMCA song came on. He cranked it up real loud, and started dancing in the limo. Needless to say the music was real loud, and the limo was bouncing all around. We were laughing so hard because our buddy said everyone at station was looking at him because the limo was bouncing so much that he couldn't get the gas nozzle in the gas tank! Plus they probably thought it was a limo full of fags! Ya know what? We're not even gay!


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I'm a hole in time, in a time that's full of holes

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Re: Post your retarded stoner epiphanies [Re: phlegmbae]
    #4786874 -

One that blew my mind:

If there were a hole in a boat where the water expelling from it shot up high enough to spray OUT of the boat, back into the surrounding water...

would it be perpetual motion?


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Shop: Myyco.com Golden Teacher Liquid Culture For Sale   Unfolding Nature Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order

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