Recently, I saw a documentary on one of CBC's independent film channels here in Canada. It was a documentary hastily put together by a Canadian journalist who brought his camera team to the United States to interview ex-soldiers who are now undergoing treatment for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) after returning from the second American attack on Iraq. Some of the information in this film was very, very disturbing. I figured I'd like to initiate some kind of dialog about it.
It was an interview with one soldier that was most upsetting. He lamented about how his commanding officer would play music over the headsets of his squadron during battle situations. The songs would be such aggressive tunes as "Let the Bodies Hit the Floor" by Drowning Pool," Marilyn Manson's "Fight Song", among others. He talked about how he was trained not only to accept killing as a necessary consequence of a justified war, but to enjoy killing "in the name of American supremacy". In tears, he confessed to the journalist that hatred for Islamic people had been installed into him and his fellow soldiers since they first left for Iraq last year, talking about how he was told to see Iraqi civilians and soldiers alike as "diseased dogs" instead of people. He confessed that he had killed dozens of Iraqis with his weapon, and had actually enjoyed watching them die. He and his fellow soldiers, he said, used to fire a few extra rounds into the bodies of dead Iraqis for entertainment.
This was a well built man, very large and muscular. His hair was short and black; he looked like a hardened military man. To see him on the screen shaking in tears was absolutely surreal. After talking about all the atrocities he committed, he moved on to talk about how he felt as though the war in Iraq, and the suffering happening as a result of the occupation, were both unjustified and unnecessary, calling it a "War of Racist Hatred".
There were also interviews with US Army generals stationed behind desks on American soil. They talked very smoothly about how war was indeed tragic and brutal, but sometimes necessary. After some jargon about total allegiance to the President, he reminded everybody that soldiers are trained to be desensitized to killing. "Our enemies are ruthless monsters", he said, "and a moment's hesitation means they kill you. In battle, It's them or you." The ethical implications of training soldiers to see human beings as "targets" to be "deleted" were greatly downplayed.
The soldier is now an in-patient at a psychiatric hospital, completely delibitated by feelings of guilt and remorse. In the documentary, doctors said that he moves back and forth between extreme denial and extreme delerium. Some days he acts naturally, claiming that he'd spent his time overseas in Europe on vacation, "to sample fine Italian wine". On other days, he has to be restrained from killing himself.
Wow. The thing that gets to me the most is that the person on my TV screen actually exists out there in the world. At the time of writing this post, he might be talking to doctors about some of the vintage he sampled during his visit to Rome, or he might be attempting to claw out his own throat. Either way, this man, who is no different from any other man anywhere in the world, is condemned to live out the rest of his life with the memories of killing others needlessly churning around in his brain. His life, and those of his entire family, will be forever impacted by that violence. To his parents and siblings, he may as well be dead. In a way, that might have been better. The man they knew before the invasion began may never be with them again, but is still alive and suffering.
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