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Ⓔ ϟ Ⓜ ϟ Ⓒ
    #16590729 -

good morning Pub. having a :drag: and heading up to the corner coffee shop for coffee. :goodmorning:
petty fights with the BF every morning is getting old. almost ruins my day. we have been so on the rocks lately and im starting to push back again :facepalm:

i feel like this today  :emo:



but mornings arent my best time of the day.

come have some coffee and a smoke and lets chat if your just waking up ((or still awake))

:bashful:


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Re: Ⓔ ϟ Ⓜ ϟ Ⓒ [Re: Mello Kitty]
    #16590737 -

Good morning ellen

I'm still in bed and I can't arsed to get up. I need to feed the cat, plant some poppies, clean the house (cause it smells like a cat) and buy groceries but fuck that. Ima stay in bed and post t on the shroomery instead.

That BF stuff of yours suck, I stopped seeing my GF for a couple of months now and I feel awesome. I miss the sex tho.


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Re: Ⓔ ϟ Ⓜ ϟ Ⓒ [Re: mellowparty]
    #16590779 -

What's up..no sleep yet for me.
Sounds like you guys should break up ellen, but thats just me.


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I need Jesus.

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Re: Ⓔ ϟ Ⓜ ϟ Ⓒ [Re: mellowparty]
    #16590802 -

i really have to give him some credit i mean he does take care of me. yea sure he works and brings home the money but i do everything else. all housework, cleaning, laundry, dishes, i do the food shopping, all of the cooking and all that fun stuff that he says he will never do. im an OcD clean freak too so when i say clean house, i mean Meth clean :lol: and that is work to on top of all my mental & addiction issues. so i get a bit bothered when he says that i do nothing all day.

o'well im over it. i normally never post relationship issues because i dont even like to read them myself but its whats going on soo :shrug:

anyone got any plans for today ? for me im just sitting at a coffee shop playing Pokémon and Lurking on shroomery until a certain store opens up.

no plans after. got the house clean spic & span and everything else done so thats outa the way. no food but out of money til i get paid at the end of the week i believe.

so i will probably just sit on the stoop with the rest of the GankstaZ 'til my B/F gets home. then im sure he will keep me in the house and not want to do anything and fall asleep in front of his playstation like every night.

sitting there watching someone play a game every evening all nite no wonder i wana be on the nod. but hey i have my Pokémon now

oh BtW on the subs again today, 2nd day clean from Heroin  :awethumb:


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Re: Ⓔ ϟ Ⓜ ϟ Ⓒ [Re: thoughts]
    #16590821 -



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Customize your Shroomery experience!
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.

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Re: Ⓔ ϟ Ⓜ ϟ Ⓒ [Re: Mello Kitty]
    #16590831 -

ellenallien said:
oh BtW on the subs again today, 2nd day clean from Heroin  :awethumb:


What about benzos?


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Re: Ⓔ ϟ Ⓜ ϟ Ⓒ [Re: Mello Kitty]
    #16590853 -

ellenallien said:
oh BtW on the subs again today, 2nd day clean from Heroin  :awethumb:



me 2, 5th day clean. How much you taking? Im taking 2-4mg and everyday gets better. No energy though, thats the worst part. My girl is on the methadone clinic and shes always running around and im stuck in bed with no energy. Good luck.


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Something there is mysteriously formed,
Existing before Heaven and Earth,
Silent, still, standing alone, unchanging,
All-pervading, unfailing,
I do not know its name; I call it tao.
If forced to give it a name, I call it
Great (ta). Being great, it flows out;
Flowing out means far-reaching;
Being far-reaching, it is said to return.

It's just a shot away..

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Re: Ⓔ ϟ Ⓜ ϟ Ⓒ [Re: Mello Kitty]
    #16590920 -

id suggest a hobby of some sort. the more you sit there watching him play his playstation and passing out is just gonna make you want to nod more and more.

stop that vicious cycle and get a hobby that doesnt involve him. make him realize that you arent there to wait on him hand and foot. nor are you gonna sit there being bored just to appease his sense of security. shake things up a bit.


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Re: Ⓔ ϟ Ⓜ ϟ Ⓒ [Re: dysphoria]
    #16590951 -

@TheMushroomJesus congratZ.. yea im having 2-4mgs a day //as needed// ((starting yesterday))

@dysphoria good advice.

i have tried to pull back the reigns before but the guilt from my past deeds, mostly lying about using, is what holds me back and makes me feel powerless towards him. but somethings got to give. i feel as tho i deserve to be treated better in that aspect. i mean, like i said he does take good care of me. but lately he's been such an A__hole to me and this is a time i need love & care. not petty arguments


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Re: Ⓔ ϟ Ⓜ ϟ Ⓒ [Re: Mello Kitty]
    #16590963 -

yes, you do deserve to be treated better...you need to tell him such though, tell him you've already made amends and come to terms with your lying to get a fix. sure, that pisses ppl off, it pissed off my wife to no end. and ive probably spent the better part of this last year trying to make up for it.

but eventually, it just becomes a source of contention and a way for him to instantly take you down a peg or two. he knows its a sensitive subject, and thus im sure he's not too reticent in reminding you of it.

enough is enough, ellen. tell him you're done putting up with it, that you know he cant be told that you're on the straight and narrow, and that you'll just have to show him, but remind him that you cant show him that you're on the straight and narrow if hes continually reminding you of the past and not allowing you nor himself to move past it.


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Re: Ⓔ ϟ Ⓜ ϟ Ⓒ [Re: Mello Kitty]
    #16590965 -

wow congrats on getting clean! just keep at it every single day, shit does get better. life does become pretty awesome. when i was on dope for 2 1/2 years, it took my brain over a month to actually reboot. I had to spend 3-4 weeks in my room, not leaving for days. But life got fucking awesome after that. I hate that I relapsed myself.

clown- I hear ya man, I hardly ever sleep at night any more. I am lucky to be asleep by 4am, usually crash about 10am and wake up at 2pm lol

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Re: Ⓔ ϟ Ⓜ ϟ Ⓒ [Re: KillerPicklez]
    #16590974 -

@dysphoria: you have great insight my friend

@KillerPicklez: thank u very much :hug:


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Re: Ⓔ ϟ Ⓜ ϟ Ⓒ [Re: Mello Kitty]
    #16590976 -

Relationships are really tough.  Even tougher when you add in addiction, recovery, and all the shit that comes with it.  My advice is to get a second PlayStation controller and join in the fun (or even if it's not fun, just to do something where there is some interaction instead of being bored to death).

Anyway, here's a tune that has put my day on a nice start.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CFsbAuX9P4w


"Ripple" - Grateful Dead (just in case the link doesn't work... still new here... and yeah, I'm one of those deadheads who tries to bring in the dead whenever possible, appropriate or not)

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Re: Ⓔ ϟ Ⓜ ϟ Ⓒ [Re: Mello Kitty]
    #16591051 -

why don't ya try planning something for him when he gets home or suprising him and saying something along hte lines of ' hey lets go here or lets go do this '. if you don't like him playing hte playstation then try to give him a better alternative of something you and him can go do. or get a movie or something you both enjoy.


also, get clean and stick with it nigga


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R.I.P. WoodRuss67, Todcasil, TheMerryIguana, The Rompus, Lord Senate.
[/url]

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Re: Ⓔ ϟ Ⓜ ϟ Ⓒ [Re: Soulidarity] * 1
    #16591081 -

Go for an adventure to get your mind off things! I want to try this idea sometime.

Take a piece of paper and cut it into a large circle. Using a marker divide the circle into 4 equal pieces. Poke a hole in the middle and fashion some sort of spinner (Think of twister).

Go out for a drive and every time you get near an intersection have some passenger spin the spinner to see if you go straight, left, right, or u-turn. Do that for an hour and see where you end up.

Of course i'll be riding my bike to work today because my car is rapidly entering its senior citizen years and needs to be taken to the shop to figure out why it's overheating so easily. :sad:


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ந=க=ரந=க=ரந=க=ரந=க=ரந=க=ரந=க=ரந=க=ரந=க=ர

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Re: Ⓔ ϟ Ⓜ ϟ Ⓒ [Re: Soulidarity]
    #16591171 -

Soulidarity said:
why don't ya try planning something for him when he gets home or suprising him and saying something along hte lines of ' hey lets go here or lets go do this '. if you don't like him playing hte playstation then try to give him a better alternative of something you and him can go do. or get a movie or something you both enjoy.


honestly he never wants to do ANYTHING except come home from work, sit on the couch, watch TV / Movies all nite, or play Ps3
which is all ok i kno work is stressfull and tiring but it's the same for the weekends. and thats fine if thats what he wants to do with all his time but he wants me there with him. i cant go anywhere when he is home, i cant have anyone over when he is home. i have issues and bordeom / lonliness are 2 of my worst triggers.


but anyway i didnt mean to make the focus on me an my b/s this is an E / M / C how's everyone else doing ? :deflect:


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Re: Ⓔ ϟ Ⓜ ϟ Ⓒ [Re: Mello Kitty]
    #16591188 -

well i dunno, ask him if he wants to go for a walk or something. or i dunno. there must be some sort of activity you both enjoy or place you can both go and spend time together.


i'm preparing for probably one of the biggest weekends of my whole year, excluding the new years eve saga. over the next 48-72 hours, i'm prob going to spend a solid 20 or so on a dancefloor :awedance:. i think if i make it through this weekend and am still sane/not in hospital then i will have done well.


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R.I.P. WoodRuss67, Todcasil, TheMerryIguana, The Rompus, Lord Senate.
[/url]

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Re: Ⓔ ϟ Ⓜ ϟ Ⓒ [Re: floatingwater]
    #16591193 -

floatingwater said:
Go for an adventure to get your mind off things! I want to try this idea sometime.

Take a piece of paper and cut it into a large circle. Using a marker divide the circle into 4 equal pieces. Poke a hole in the middle and fashion some sort of spinner (Think of twister).

Go out for a drive and every time you get near an intersection have some passenger spin the spinner to see if you go straight, left, right, or u-turn. Do that for an hour and see where you end up.

Of course i'll be riding my bike to work today because my car is rapidly entering its senior citizen years and needs to be taken to the shop to figure out why it's overheating so easily. :sad:


this is a Brilliant idea ! +5:mushroom2:

it would be even better if i could take this with me



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Re: Ⓔ ϟ Ⓜ ϟ Ⓒ [Re: Mello Kitty]
    #16591206 -

whats up guys ?



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Re: Ⓔ ϟ Ⓜ ϟ Ⓒ [Re: Mello Kitty]
    #16591239 -

I'm bored out of my mind. Reading a paper very slowly, doing laundry, just planted a buncha poppy seeds and watered my pet potato.

My cat gave me a kiss :inlove:

Exploring this guy's soundcloud http://soundcloud.com/floxytek





Fuck its soo boring around here. There is no one I can call and I gotta keep away from those pods (its getting more and more difficult).


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