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Can't stop thinkin bout him.
    #11820354 -

Worked with a guy, Parker, who was about 60.

Funniest guy ever, one of those "Lemme tell ya a story, kid" type of guys. Every day, always a story. Worked at our place because he loved doing his job and he had done it for so long. He knew all of his clients intimately - guess it happens when you know someone 40+ years - and he was just this laid back, chill guy. Didn't need the money. After a while he let his paychecks just sit on his desk. Owned a few boats, etc etc.

He fucking stroked out, died of a complication (staph?) a day or two later, was cremated quickly by his wife in a real 'shotgun funeral'.


I didn't fucking get to say goodbye, I didn't get to go to the wake since I didn't know, obviously I didn't get to see the ashes spread, it fucking sucks, I think about him every once in awhile and he was like a fucking role model, he'd be calling me a pussy right now and patting me on the back tellin me a story, kid...

:facepalm:


Haven't even talked to my therapist about this or cried. It's been 3 years. Son of a bitch.

Fuck my life.

:facepalm:


:heart: RIP Parker :heart:

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Re: Can't stop thinkin bout him. [Re: Adden]
    #11820358 -

Fuck I should've gone and seen him at the hospital, but I thought he was going to be OK, because he was Parker and shit like that doesn't happen to Parker. People said I didn't wanna see him but I wanted to see him :sad:

I'm sorry guys I just gotta let this out, I had never lost a "dad-esque" figure in my entire life. :sad:

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Re: Can't stop thinkin bout him. [Re: Adden]
    #11820359 -

RIP loss always sucks. I'm sorry dude


--------------------
OP is now RP!  Read about it here!


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Re: Can't stop thinkin bout him. [Re: Maverick]
    #11820363 -

Sad story bro. Sorry man.


--------------------
My trade list!🤯

Dreamcatchers by my girl

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Re: Can't stop thinkin bout him. [Re: drizzle7788]
    #11820367 -

:hug:

How was work, Mav?

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Re: Can't stop thinkin bout him. [Re: Adden]
    #11820368 -

3 years is a long time to grieve for someone you didnt know well enough to attend whatever funeral services he had. not to say that  being sad is unjustified, but remember all the good he did for you, the fact that you still think about him is evidence of his presence. People only die if you let them die.


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I close my eyes and seize it
I clench my fists and beat it
I light my torch and burn it
I am the beast I worship....

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Re: Can't stop thinkin bout him. [Re: Olympus Mons]
    #11820374 -

It was hardly announced that he died, very few people even knew. It was quite literally like the next day. Bam, cremated, thank-you-goodbye everyone. Even people that had gone said it was like an assembly line and very few things said before the doors shut.

We took his mother to the casino, took care of her in the Winter, very close with his family. I guess I could be angry at his wife for pushing everything through so fast but that was her decision. He was part of our family for over 20 years, so it's not like we didn't know him well enough...

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Re: Can't stop thinkin bout him. [Re: Adden]
    #11820378 -

I think I'm just on overload now that it's catching up to me. Sorry for the depressing posts guys.

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Re: Can't stop thinkin bout him. [Re: Adden]
    #11820392 -

Dystopia said:
It was hardly announced that he died, very few people even knew. It was quite literally like the next day. Bam, cremated, thank-you-goodbye everyone. Even people that had gone said it was like an assembly line and very few things said before the doors shut.

We took his mother to the casino, took care of her in the Winter, very close with his family. I guess I could be angry at his wife for pushing everything through so fast but that was her decision. He was part of our family for over 20 years, so it's not like we didn't know him well enough...


i see.


--------------------
I close my eyes and seize it
I clench my fists and beat it
I light my torch and burn it
I am the beast I worship....

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Re: Can't stop thinkin bout him. [Re: Adden]
    #11820394 -

I hope that you can work through this so that you will feel better. IMHO, grieving is a mandatory process that will happen whether we want it to or not.
If it is repressed, it will just resurface later and manifest itself in other and potentially more harmful ways.
So get busy dealing with the feelings and you will possibly avoid a lot of other stuff that is caused by the underlying feelings.
Talk about it, cry about it, whatever you need to do.
You will honor his memory more by dealing with it and being healthy than have it gnawing at you.
:heart:


--------------------
"Freedom is something that dies unless it's used." H.T.
I've come to believe that the heart is the filter of the enlightened mind. Epilson Lyrae

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Re: Can't stop thinkin bout him. [Re: Epilson Lyrae]
    #11822734 -

Olympus Mons said:
People only die if you let them die.


I love this. :heart: :thumbup: :heart:

gngsteroflove said:
Talk about it, cry about it, whatever you need to do.
You will honor his memory more by dealing with it and being healthy than have it gnawing at you.
:heart:


Wow, thank you so much.

This really made my day. Had a long one at work.

This side-swiped me really bad this morning.

Father told me yesterday how all the "old guys" are still gathering at the old business - boss owns the plaza - for lunch once in awhile to shoot the breeze. I almost asked how Parker was :facepalm:

Man, I've really not dealt with this well at all. Called the parents today and my mother, who's been a nurse 40+ years, said it wasn't one of those grieving "You don't want to see him"... it was one of the real ones... "didn't look like himself and was all cut up" you-don't-want-to-see...

I'm doing a bit better... all of your kind words and the support is :hug:

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Re: Can't stop thinkin bout him. [Re: Adden]
    #11822759 -

:thumbup::heart:


--------------------
"Freedom is something that dies unless it's used." H.T.
I've come to believe that the heart is the filter of the enlightened mind. Epilson Lyrae

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Re: Can't stop thinkin bout him. [Re: Adden]
    #11822845 -

Dystopia said:
:hug:

How was work, Mav?


:hug:
work is doing okay, I really just want to move into my apartment.

Hope you're feeling better!


--------------------
OP is now RP!  Read about it here!


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