While I've been looking into mushroom cultivation for quite some time now, and have actually ordered spores for the sake of growing my own shrooms, tonight is the first time I have actually tried them myself. About a month ago, I purchased 2 grams of dried cubes from a friend of sorts. I used a cap and a couple of stems to try and grow on agar, but to no avail. To celebrate ordering some pure spores, I decided to eat the remainder of my previous purchase: a bit more than a gram, MAYBE a gram and a half of dried shrooms.
Still tripping, four hours later. And I'm tripping hard. I'm honestly shocked by the potency of these things. I've done my research and I under no circumstances thought about a gram and a half would be giving me these results.
9:00 P.M. : I just arrived home, figured I'd eat my handful of shrooms and hop in the shower. I enjoyed what I convinced myself was a placebo high, and giggled to myself and hummed songs from when I was younger. I was having a really great time!
10:00 : still enjoying what I thought was a placebo, making some art :). in this time I was extremely social and sent lots of "!!!" and ":)" messages. It was fun! The world felt cute and amiable, I was peppy but looking forward to sleep.
11:00 : Feeling happy, not asleep yet. I kept checking snapchat to see who was up and what was going on. not a placebo anymore at all, definitely getting real kicks.
12:00 : oh god. what the fuck is going on. ive been trying to sleep but i cant. closed eye hallucinations are insane, overpowering. three dimensional and my hands feel separate from my consciousness. I watch them move, but i have no control over them. i get very anxious when i touch my hair, face, or body because they dont feel like my hands. when i look at them, they appear swollen and foreign, sometimes aged. for a long time my fingers were in my mouth, i've been putting lots of stuff in my mouth? I feel like a kid for sure. very emotional, vulnerable, somewhat afraid yet adoring of the world around me. i keep trying to ground myself but i cannot.
1:00 : i finally turned on a light, got up to go to the bathroom. although it was a short walk, i was amazed by the feeling of walking. everything appears green and yellow tinted and the walls keep changing. sounds seem foreign and amplified, my being still feels like its hanging out a bit behind my body. i feel like im maybe coming out of it (1:10) but then I am engulfed in the breathing of the room. with much resentment, i find myself talking to an object. something i had hoped this trip would not come to. Every now and then my feet move and i'm disgusted by this, but i cannot explain why. they seem very foreign maybe. my closed eye hallucinations seem like they are trying to teach me something. my hands and some energy search for a maternal instinct but find none and suddenly i am rising while everything else is falling. my hands squeeze my face and i would prefer they didnt. pain seems incredibly delocalized, unlike the sound of my keyboard, which is omnipresent. this has way too many commas, my apologies. going to try and sleep now. wish me fucking luck.